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Shinobi Insider by Oni_Chan

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Chapter notes: -evil smile- I hope you enjoy this chapter, I sure did

Anyways, have fun
The camera flashes on and focuses on the four hosts in their chairs, though it suddenly shakes, before once again focusing.



Yabane and Imashime: You know who were are...

Girls: Losers...

Nikki: Anyways, lets invite our guest host first...


The camera turns towards the entrance as a girl with long brunette hair that's up in a side ponytail comes out, waving. She looks at the hosts and sits down next to Yabane.

Nikki: So, Kelsea-chan, you wanna introduce the topic today?

Kelsea: Why of course!

A shuffling sound is heard as Nikki walks backstage, throwing things aside until coming back out with a crumpled up envelope.

Kelsea: -takes envelope and opens it- ....The...the topic is...

Imashime: WOULD YOU TELL US ALREADY?! GOD! I have better things to do -looks at Yabane-

Yabane: o_o Take all the time you need...

Kelsea: Is Orochimaru a pedophile, from Vampire's Butterfly...

The camera moves to show Nikki stomping off stage in a made rage as she comes back with atomic bombs, pepper spray, and a chainsaw.

Oni: Okay...

Everyone scoots away from Nikki as her evil laugh echoes through the entire studio.

Imashime: Our guests are Orochimaru, Uchiha Sasuke, and Yakushi Kabuto...Oh no....

The camera flashed back to the entrance of the studio where the three nin came out, annoyed looks on their faces as they glared daggers into the audience. A loud thump is heard as Imashime is pushed out of his seat.


Orochimaru takes his seat next to the hostess, who automatically clings to his arm, as the others sit in the available seats. Another thump is heard as Yabane is pushed out of his chair, and pulled back in it, once Imashime has sat down.

Kelsea: So, Orochimaru-sama, are you a pedophile?

Orochimaru:...Are you?

Kelsea: No

Orochimaru: There you just answered the question.

Kelsea: Bastard...

Imashime: So, Sasuke, Kabuto, has Orochimaru raped either one of you?

Sasuke: OF COURSE NOT! He supports SasuNaru, the only reason he took me to his lair was to make me strong, so I can stay seme.

Kabuto: I wi...I mean, no, my dear Kelsea-chan...

Cameras turn to face solely on Kelsea, as she glares daggers into Kabuto, as if daring him to finish that sentence.

Kelsea: So, Nikki-sama, what do you think about his?


The sound of a chainsaw being revved up is heard coming from behind Nikki's seat, as an evil smirk is placed upon her face.

Oni:...Kohai, are you okay?

Nikki: NO!

Sasuke: You know, I've wondered, why do people always make the bad guy a pedophile, and besides, do you think I'd let myself get molested? My ass is for no one.

Imashime: ...How about Naruto-chan?

Sasuke: His ass is mine, difference.

Imashime: I want Yabane's ass....


Nikki: Anyways...Orochi-kun...Orochi-kun...what are you doing?

The camera focuses on the raven haired jinchuuriki as he writes down plans...involving blood, lots and lots of blood.

Orochimaru: I'm perfectly fine....

Nikki: Um...Okay, if you say so, Orochi-kun

Oni: I have a question of my own! Why is Kelsea acting so pissy right now?

Kelsea: Kabu-kun is mine...

Kabuto: Apparently...all Shiinto's ha...

He is cut off as Nikki appears behind him, whacking him on the head with a baseball bat.

Oni: KOHAI! Why'd you do that?

Nikki: Sempai, because it's time to end the show...

Oni: Okay...but did you really NEED to do that?

Nikki:...Would you rather it be you?

Oni: thank you....


Oni: ONI!

The cameras search around for Imashime and Yabane...who seem to have disappeared.

Nikki: Damnit...-grabs camcorder- Their at it again...

Orochimaru: Orochimaru signing off.

Sasuke: Uchiha Sasuke...I'M GOING TO KILL YOU ANIKI

Nikki drags Orochimaru off stage, Sasuke and Oni behind, leaving the knocked out form of Kabuto to the angry Kelsea.

Nikki and Oni: UNTIL NEXT TIME
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