I find your stories quite amusing. Though I would think you should add some narrator dialouge to keep a balance between the character dialouge and the narrator dialouge. And also it's to keep the readers from getting confused with time and setting. Because you decide to change a setting to some where else and you don't have the narration dialouge to prove it no one will know. Let's face it not adding narration dialouge is like reading naruto without naruto all wrong. Also I think that you should recheck your work because I see few minor typos. Other than that this stry is very very awesome no doubt you should write more. Keep it up!
Hunter

Author's Response: Dont worry, we will fix that in a while XD We where realy bored and roleplaying at the time...and it was like realy early in the morning. Glad you enjoy our storries ^_^