Reviews For The Angel Society
Name: theez (Signed) · Date: 25/08/11 - 07:51 pm · For: The Chosen
Darn! Too late! Man I wanted to add a character! Oh well. Great job! I really enjoyed this, can't wait to see what happens!
Name: Rainbow Fire (Signed) · Date: 22/08/11 - 08:46 am · For: Descendant of the Snake
Ooh, Amanda was very well done. I could practically feel her bloodthirst. You did an excellent job with her, good work. And now you leave the readers in suspense with the ending, and I can't wait to see what happens with Kenshin. Keep up the good work!
Name: Fantasy Madeline (Signed) · Date: 17/08/11 - 08:35 pm · For: The Chosen
WOW! I love Amanda Shi! Excellent work, I love my character, you did a terrific job on her. Can't wait for more! 10/10!
Name: silverwolf1213 (Signed) · Date: 17/08/11 - 07:48 pm · For: Descendant of the Snake
Well, first with the character thing, you can just use her as a General as is. I believe she (Akako, I think? I'm honestly too tired and lazy to check) was the light vs dark character. If you don't want that, you can change it. Other than that, I guess you can keep her the same. Unless that doesn't work for you at all, in which case, please tell me so I can properly change her.
Okay, now onto the chapter.
I loved it. You did a great job with Amanda's bloodthirsty personality. I know it's up to Fantasy Madeline to decide, but I personally think she was really good.
Oh wow, I really wonder what will happen to Kenshin... O_O
This was awesome, even if it was short. I loved it! Great job. Keep up the fantastic work!
Author's Response: She's just fine the way she is. And I'm glad I got her personality to be bloodthirsty like I meant to. As for Kenshin, you'll have to wait and see.
Name: Starless__Night (Signed) · Date: 17/08/11 - 02:41 pm · For: The Generals
Name: Yoru Saito
Gender: Male
Ancestor: not the descendant but from the same clan as Kimimaro.
Age: 23
Weakness: Not a fan of heights and has trouble thinking of things on the spot. Usually he just does what his body feels like doing.
Specialty: Taijutsu
Personality: He's calm no matter what the situation. Sometime his calmness annoys people, though. He enjoys being in quiet places, and he rarely talks. He can be a really good friend to have, though, and will protect your back even if he wants to slit your throat.
Appearance: (disclaimer: not mine)
If it doesn't show, here's the link:
http://fc04.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2010/294/6/5/kaguya_dimitria___by_gunjester-d317pu0.jpg
Tattoo Info: Basically it's a slightly large tear drop at the edge of his eye.
History: He was raised by the Taijutsu king, making him very loyal to him/her. He's grown up fighting and learning to kill with his abilities. Because of who he was raised by, he very rarely hesitates before killing, not getting the chance to ever makes bonds or anything to create light within him.
Chakra Nature: None
Unlocked Kekkei Genkai: the bone kekkei genkai
Unlocked Special Abilities: He can fracture ones entire bone with a simply touch if he adds chakra to it.
Name: Rainbow Fire (Signed) · Date: 05/08/11 - 09:29 am · For: Sixteenth Birthdays
Rikuto was great, don't worry. You wrote him as if you created him.
This chapter was a great intro to the sad idea of sixteenth birthdays. It was sad to see how a birthday can be so tragic for the teens. I think you wrote it very well.
And Rikuto's vision was pretty awesome, as it brings back the idea of the plot. I liked it, it was a really good insert.
Well done. I hope to see this continued, as it is a very good story with a great plot and idea. Nice job with this chapter! Keep up the good work!
Author's Response: Phew. That's good. I did him just right then. And yeah, this was a sadder one of the chapters. Probably the saddest. And I tried to make it not fully sad by throwing in that vision.
Name: Rainbow Fire (Signed) · Date: 05/08/11 - 09:04 am · For: Signs of the Awakening
Wow. Suspenseful. The little part in the beginning had me curious about how this story will play out. And then Kyoshi's encounter with this omniscient force was incredible. It was sad to hear about her tragic home life, but the way you wrote it was actually filled with a twisted kind of hope that really captured my attention. I think this story really has amazing potential. Now I'm off to read more!
Name: krina (Signed) · Date: 19/06/11 - 07:16 pm · For: The Chosen
I decided to change the picture since I don't like that pic. (disclaimer: doesn't belong to me)
http://i302.photobucket.com/albums/nn113/GenieNoodle-x/Random%20Anime/Boys/dyj.jpg
Author's Response: Okay.
Name: shadow4000 (Signed) · Date: 16/06/11 - 11:14 am · For: Sixteenth Birthdays
wow!
nice! =D
felt sad for both the kids, otherwise the story was awesome!!! =)
keep up da good job :)
Author's Response: Yeah, that was what the chapter was meant for. Had to make you feel sympathy for the characters. I'm glad that in your point of view I did amazing. =D
Name: cvhoneybee (Signed) · Date: 16/06/11 - 10:01 am · For: Sixteenth Birthdays
Fantastic job!
I'm so glad that Sadao was in this chapter, I was really excited to see my character into it. And you did great with him, he was great in this chapter.
Good interaction with the characters. And the emotion gives it a nice touch.
Update again soon =D
Author's Response: Phew. I was worried I'd get his personality wrong, but according to you, I didn't. I'm glad I did him right. And I'm also glad I got the emotion down right (okay, I'll admit, most of that was Sasaui's doing, but the crappie writing I sent her must have helped her a little). It sucks being the one who doesn't write best *head drops in shame*rnrnOkay, I'm done moping. I'll try to update soon, but that all depends on Sasaui. I really need to get a good writer who doesn't have to do her own story then work on mine. But I'm a patient person. I just hope the people who like this are to because Sasaui can be slow sometimes..... If she reads this, I'm probably going to get evil eyes......
Name: silverwolf1213 (Signed) · Date: 16/06/11 - 08:09 am · For: Sixteenth Birthdays
Wow! This was incredible! The entire scene with Sorano and her family was heartbreaking, and the emotion in this part had me on the edge of my seat. Nice work.
And you did great with Rikuto! His personaltiy was spot on, and his reaction when meeting Sorano was perfect. Great work with his character, you did awesome!
Haha, sky and earth. I didn't even think of that when I made his name, but that was great insight!
This was an excellent chapter! I loved the entire thing.... except when it ended *pouts* But I was impressed the entire time, nice work! Keep up the great work with this, this chapter was amazing!
Author's Response: Yeah. I had to make that part sad since it always is when a family has their daughter taken from them. Just thinking about how cruel I am for doing that to the poor kids makes me want to hit myself, but that's how the story must go. Okay, that may have been a hyperbole, but oh well. Thanks a lot for the review! I'm sorry about it ending. But I'm glad I got Rikuto right.
Name: Fantasy Madeline (Signed) · Date: 16/06/11 - 07:39 am · For: The Chosen
@ shadow-I give my consent.
Name: shadow4000 (Signed) · Date: 15/06/11 - 09:30 pm · For: The Chosen
eternal youth jutsu here as well??
urm than no uncle, just ancestor.....
=) sorry for not taking that in mind =P
@madeline i know their personalities dnt match, plus she like snake, hmm... her whole world is snakes, the fact that he has a phobia towards reptiles, especially snakes i putting it for the same reason
it cnt b like this.... he always sees her kinda alone, he thinks others leave her that way not knowing she WANTS to b alone
he starts interfering in her life HOPING(just hoping) to change something in her... that's hw he falls for her... she reacts rudely
but he is patient n isn't angered easily....
plus that she has a snake makes him freak out always(making a hilarious scene)
all this if sky-chan n Madeline doesn't mind =D
Author's Response: First off, okay, Shadow. Second, how'd my story become the spot for communicating?
Name: krina (Signed) · Date: 15/06/11 - 06:08 pm · For: The Generals
Name: Kumo Aburame
Gender: Male
Ancestor: Let's go with Shino!
Age: 23
Weakness: He's terrified of fire and his ears are sensitive to loud sounds.
Specialty: Ninjutsu
Personality: Quiet and sticks to himself. The only time he talks is when he needs to or is asked a question. People can hear him talking to his bugs sometimes.
Appearance: (disclaimer: I don't own this)
http://fc04.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2010/334/b/e/tamo__full_profile_by_atemuzuko-d33yvs0.jpg
Tattoo info: On the back of his right hand. It looks like a spider
History: He was a loner from birth, always sticking to the forest outside his house to examine bugs. Even as a child bugs seemed to always be around him. He even played with the most poisonous bugs and they didn't bug him (hah, they didn't bug him).
Chakra nature: Does bug count?
Kekkei Genkai: The ability to control bugs
Special Abilities: Bug related jutsu. He likes spiders the best and make himself spider-like like the guy from the sound ninja four whose name I cannot recall right now.
Other: None
Name: Fantasy Madeline (Signed) · Date: 15/06/11 - 05:50 pm · For: The Chosen
@ Shadow-
You wanted to know if Amanda and your characters could be in a relationship. Here is your answer. It would have to be a progressive relationsihp, taking a while to develop. Would your character's persona match though? You have to understand that Amanda likes death and pain. She likes seeing the blood of others, and screams are like music to her. She loves her super deadly snake, more than anything. She is like a female Orochimaru who specializes in genjutsu and torture. She is basically evil, and would your character want to be with someone like that? Think about that.
Name: Demon Fox (Signed) · Date: 15/06/11 - 03:50 pm · For: The Chosen
Silverwolf1213, my sister, told me about this joint story idea that she STOLE from the Inuyasha Fan Fiction website and how it was a great success over here. So I just HAD to read all of the joint stories. I'm glad I did. Yours is great! I like all the characters so far. I can't wait for more. Nice job! Keep it up. Update soon!
Author's Response: Well, I think stole is a little harsh. And I've seen them at Fanfiction.net as well, so I guess it's just a thing that goes around. Anyway, thanks for saying that. I would update more, but Sasaui's going to work on her story for a little bit and then work on mine again. Having her rewrite my chapters makes it so hard to update
Name: shadow4000 (Signed) · Date: 15/06/11 - 12:15 am · For: The Generals
Name: Umiko Hoshikage
Gender: Female
Ancestor (optional): Kisame Hoshikage
Age: 17
Weakness: Genjutsu & lightening
Specialty : Kenjutsu
Personality: Umiko loves to fight... usually preferring to crush every part of the remains of her victims......
just like her uncle kisame..... Umiko is a deadly swordsman...
despite her aggressive nature, she is very perspective in battle and is seemingly aware of the dangers she might face n can quickly react.....
Appearance (pictures accepted): she has shark-like looks complete with a pale blue skin, small white round eyes, gill-like markings on d neck n sharp triangular teeth...long white hair with a blue shade(urm... i'd suggest u do her hair n clothes)
Tattoo Info (design and location here): a shark's jaw tatoo on the right side of her neck.....
History: She is Kisame Hoshigake's Niece.... She was very Closely attached to him... he himself trained her...he was like a role model to her.... but when he died.. it tore her apart... she couldn't bear it... She Planned revenge.... She fouund his sword The Samehada.... She couldn't understand how to take revenge... She hated everyboddy.. every Shinobi as Kisame was her only Family!!! She wants revenge... she hangs on to Kisame's Sword The Samehada n mastered it... it is the only thing she has which belongs to her uncle....
Chakra Nature: Water
Kekkei Genkai: can absorb opponents chakra wen in water
Special Abilities: turns more muscular n shark-like wen absorbed too much chakra (unlocked later on)
weapon: Samehada- the same one Kisame used.....She took it after he killed himself
Other (optional): she can summon Sharks....
is it ok?
Author's Response: Everything but one thing. This is 215 years after Naruto Shippuden. Do you want her to have an Eternal Youth jutsu or something? Other than that, she's great. I'm glad I helped you understand!rnrn-Sky-chan
Name: shadow4000 (Signed) · Date: 15/06/11 - 12:00 am · For: The Chosen
oh alright!
got it now! ^.^
Name: shadow4000 (Signed) · Date: 14/06/11 - 01:25 am · For: The Chosen
Oh no probs ^.^
m kinda starting to understand.....
urm....hopefully :P
oh nvm all will b sorted out as the story proceeds
n yeah plz add the tiger
Author's Response: So, are you going to make a General? To help explain more, it's like Template #2 like Sasaui and Krina did.
Name: Fantasy Madeline (Signed) · Date: 13/06/11 - 06:25 pm · For: The Chosen
Oh, sorry. I did not see the age rule. I will change the age to 16 then.
Author's Response: Okay. Sorry if I seemed pushy.
Name: Fantasy Madeline (Signed) · Date: 13/06/11 - 07:59 am · For: The Chosen
You did a nice job on this chapter. You allude to a future plotline well, and added a fair amount of foreshadowing. You used both at the right time and place too. You did a nice job with the child abuse allusion, and i really look foreward to seeing how you handle my character's evilness. Until your next post, bye!
Author's Response: Thanks a lot for the review. I'm glad you think I did a good job. I'll try to make Amanda as evil as possible, but I can't promise I'll do as well as Silverwolf did with your evil character. I'll try my best, though.
Name: silverwolf1213 (Signed) · Date: 13/06/11 - 03:36 am · For: Signs of the Awakening
Excellent work! You got Kyoshi perfectly! I couldn't have written that scene better myself, well done! I loved the beginning as well, it was so intense and mysterious. This was a great chapter, it is such a good way to start the story. Good job, keep up the great work! I'm very excited for more!
Author's Response: *sighs in relief* Good. I was terrified it sucked. As you can see, Sasaui and I sorta have low self-confidence (even if she'll never admit that). Thanks for making my confidence lift some. I'm glad I did Kyoshi well. I decided to start it out with her since I had to start with a general and she was the first one I got. That, and I thought she'd be the perfect one to be given the mark. I'll try to be this great in the future.
Name: shadow4000 (Signed) · Date: 13/06/11 - 01:30 am · For: The Chosen
generals???
urm... ok i am confused...
i already gave this character... but i put him in again... i thought that was wat we were supposed 2 do.... :P
so wat are these generals actually??
Author's Response: Generals is the second kind of ocs I need. So basically I'm asking for bad guys now.
Name: shadow4000 (Signed) · Date: 13/06/11 - 12:15 am · For: The Chosen
Name: Kazuki Ushiro
Gender: Male
Ancestor (optional): Mei Terumi
Age: 18
Weakness: Genjutsu
Has a phobia towards reptiles
Specialty: ninjutsu
Personality: Light-hearted, fun loving Happy-go-lucky, slightly perv, friendly, talkative, brave(afraid of nothing with the exception of reptiles, especially snakes), will do anything for people he loves....
Appearance (pictures accepted):Black Messy spikes, bright green eyes, fair skin, black tank top(torn sleeves) , cargo pants, a bright yellow stone for a locket..
Tattoo Info (design and location here): the tatoo is on his right arm on his triceps....it forms a tiger's image
History:He used to live with his family n little sister..... living a normal, boring life, until He left his house to go on an adventure along with his pet tiger(shadow)..... where He fought many ninja, shinobi, rogues, wild animals..... improving his skills.....
Chakra Nature: fire & wind
Kekkei Genkai: can turn himself into wind...... but it absorbs lots of his chakra...... so He very rarely uses it
Special Abilities: super speed...agility, he can create a devastating blazing tornado.....(both are unlocked l8tr)
Other (optional):He has a pet Tiger as mentioned above^^ his name is Shadow...(u can change the name if u like...)
Author's Response: Sorry for the confusion. You can give me an actual general if you want and I'll use them. And do you want your chosen Kazuki, not the one you got confused with above, character to have a Tiger?
Name: cvhoneybee (Signed) · Date: 12/06/11 - 10:47 pm · For: Signs of the Awakening
Good first chapter and I'm really happy it has started. You're doing great, I swear!
I did see one mistake though, towards the end you put the word fill when I believe you meant to put feel. Just thought I would point that out.
Anyways update soon! I want to see my characters in action =D
Author's Response: Phew. Yet another relief. My confidence is slowly rising more. And, as I said, I was writing this around 12:30. I was exhausted and just wanted to get it done to go to sleep. And your character should be in around two chapters. At least that's my goal. I'll try to get there soon.