SasUKE, Dobe? (Happy B-Day Sasuke-Bastard)



“Oh god, that is great!”



“Brilliant!”



“I’m totally gonna wet myself!”



That annoying laughter. It just wouldn’t. Shut. The fuck. UP!




“Naruto.”




Said blonde managed a pant that roughly sounded like a ‘what?’ through his mindless cackling.



“Shut up.”




Naruto chortled some more, some snorts mingling with his laughs. “I’m sorry (“No you’re not.”) Man, but your name is-”



“Not at all what it seems,” Sasuke quipped, effectively cutting off the blubbering idiot. He wasn’t really sure why he had accepted the blonde’s invite in the first place. Sure, Naruto threw the party for him, but he didn’t necessarily have to go, did he?



Well, apparently he did. For he was lounging on a deep gray couch with the annoying Uzumaki boy, who had done nothing for the past half hour but make a mockery of Uchiha SasUKE’s name. Humph.



Somewhere in the middle of Naruto’s ranting of how Sasuke would end up uke in any relationship he made, due to his name, said Uchiha had managed to tune out all the other party guests.



Faintly in the background, a clock chimed, alerting everyone that a new day had started. When would these people leave, anyway? Didn’t parties normally end at 10, not midnight?



“Yeah, well what does your name mean, smart ass?” Naruto’s voice, dripping with sarcasm, pulled him from his thoughts.



Sasuke sniffed. “I was named after Sarutobi Sasuke, if you must know.” (1)



Naruto stared.



And stared.



And stared some more.



“Well, who the fuck is that?”



Sasuke was tempted to grab the beer bottle out of the blonde’s hand and smash it over someone’s head. Primarily Naruto’s, but he wasn’t sure if he would mind doing that to himself at the moment, either.



The Uchiha huffed indignantly, ripping his gaze from the tanned face and towards the couch’s upholstery. “I’m not going to be explaining such trivial matters to you all night, dobe.”



Silence.



And more silence.



And even more silence.



“So…you’re name means uke?”



A vein twitched above Sasuke’s right eye, he knew it did. “It does not mean ‘uke’ you idiot. And if anything, I would be ‘seme’ in a relationship. Anyone who thinks otherwise will be dealt with and tossed into your ramen-filled cabinet.” (2)



Even though Sasuke was looking the other way, he could still see a Cheshire grin pulling at Naruto’s lips. “Are you sure your not made out to be an uke?” Sasuke subconsciously blocked the rants he knew would be coming, by focusing his attention on something else. Unfortunately, that something else happened to be Naruto’s bright orange t-shirt that was slowly slipping down and revealing a very delectable collar…hmm…Sasuke was tempted to start sucking on it then and there, but everyone else was right there in the house, so…



Maybe later.



“…’Cuz, I mean, I can sure as hell see you on a bed, nude, with your wrists tied above your head in black lace, face flushed and a “Fuck Me; I’m Uke!” expression planted on your face!”



…What…the…fuck?



“Naruto, have you been reading Kakashi’s books again?”



“Che, where have you been? I get them directly from Ero-Sennin.” It was meant to be a joke, he was sure, but something made Sasuke think otherwise.



“Seriously though,” Naruto continued, going back to what he was saying before. “I can totally picture this. Uchiha Sasuke, cum splattered all about your stomach-oh, your shirt’s piled near your chest by the way, cuz no one bothered to take it off; cum leaking out of your mouth and - ahhh, what the HELL!.?”



Naruto writhed uncomfortably, almost dropping his beer bottle as he set it on the wooden floor beside the couch, as long fingers made quick work of slithering down his pants and boxers.



He almost moaned out loud as Sasuke’s cool fingers brushed across his heated cock, arousal spiking up his spine while his fingers hooked themselves at the edge of the couch, digging into the rugged fabric. “Fuck…”



Sasuke, who had somehow gotten to be almost on top of him without being noticed, nibbled at the outer shell of Naruto’s ear. “That imagination of yours is causing me some problems…as well as yourself, it would seem.”



Naruto did his best to glare, which he found to be hard--difficult with someone grasping and fingering your erection. “What the hell are you doing!” It was supposed to come out as a whisper, but it turned into a high pitched squeak when a finger snubbed his tip.



“Damn it, Sasuke; do you realize what you’re doing? Where we-” His voice set off into a scratchy croak.



Sasuke sucked above his collar bone, sinking his teeth into the flesh he found there and then sucking again. He pulled back at the end of his ministrations to blow evenly on the reddening neck, loving how the boy next to him shivered at the mixed textures.



It was almost funny, how no one noticed. The heartthrob of Konoha, leaning over Uzumaki Naruto with one hand in his pants and the other latched onto his neck.



Naruto did his best to bite back a groan, but a small mewl slipped past his lips when he felt the fingers tighten their vice grip and pump him in time with the sucking and smacking noises that vibrated against his neck.



When he thought he was gaining control over himself again, something unexpected happened-there was a very hard object grinding eagerly against his right knee. That only hardened him further, as he managed soft thrusts against the invading hand.



“Nnng…N-not here…’Suke…” He managed, hoping that the raven-haired boy would be able to translate it. Sasuke did just that; to him, it clearly read: ‘Fuck me; bedroom. NOW.’



SasSEME?



“Damn it, my ass hurts…” Naruto whined, rolling over so he was on his stomach; the blankets still draped across his backside.



Sasuke sighed, propping himself next to the blonde on his elbows. “Your ass hurts?”



Naruto glared at him half-heartedly. “Fuck, yes, my ass hurts.”



The brunette glared back. “You had it easy all night; I had the hard part, idiot.”



The blonde snorted. “Yeah, right.”



Sasuke’s eye twitched. “My ass took the most damage, I don’t care what you say.” (3)



…



So…



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Who was SEME and who was UKE?



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……..



No one. Everyone saw the tousled couple trying to go upstairs while jerking each other off. The girls beat up Naruto and the guys proclaimed rape and beat the shit out of Sasuke. Poor SasuNaru!



-



Moon:



(1) He really was. But that’s not what this is here for. I added the ‘if you must know’ because….I don’t know why, but it seemed right XD.



(2) In a round-about way, he threatened Naru-chan’s precious ramen.



(3) I liked typing that line. (Snickers)

SasUKE, Dobe?



“Hey, Sasuke…!”



Said Uchiha cocked a brow as he swallowed a small serving of his miso ramen. “What is it, dobe?”



Naruto unhealthily slurped at his ramen, not bothering with the use of the provided chopsticks. “Can we go back to my place after this?” (“And don’t call me that, you bastard!”)



The sentence came out with such ease that it almost prevented the dirty thoughts from entering Sasuke’s naughty little mind. Almost. (Inner Sasu-Perv: YES!) “Sure.”



“Yosh!” He could hear the grin in Naruto’s words, even though his face was hidden by the white ramen bowl and splattered broth.



Maybe his birthday wouldn’t be so bad, after all.



SasuNaru is smex! Err…Love, yeah…SasuNaru is LOVE! (Isn’t that a doujin group ((Shot again for interrupting.))?)



“So…” Naruto started awkwardly, rubbing at the back of his neck nervously and eyeing Sasuke out of the corner of his eye.



A long, smooth brow rose for the second time that night. “So…?”



Sasuke walked alongside Naruto, his hands stuffed in his pockets and his shoulders addressed evenly. Stoic, indeed.



His blackened eyes searched for Naruto’s, and he had to admit how surprised he was when he found the blonde looking at the pebbled road with a fine pink line highlighting his tanned cheeks. That sure was a difference from last night’s…forwardness.



Sasuke shuffled a bit as he walked. That had become a touchy subject that he shoved on the backburner of his mind. (His Inner Sasu-Perv dwelled on it, though.) He didn’t know what to make of Naruto’s words. He did know one thing for sure though: Naruto definitely wasn’t as innocent and oblivious as he made himself to be.



The raven-haired boy suddenly shuddered, but he wasn’t sure if it was from the cold of the evening air that bit at his bare arms or the excitement produced by the mental image of Naruto…in the same way Naruto said he pictured the Uchiha to be (cough previous chapter cough).



“Ah, Sasuke…”



He bit his lip. If only the blonde said that in different circumstances…



He looked up from his feet (when had he looked down?) to meet the face of Naruto, staring at him curiously with a blush covering the Kyubi whiskers. “Hn?”



“Are you coming-” It almost sounded as if Naruto was about to trail off, but choked on whatever it was he tried to manage as soft lips firmly sealed his mouth.



Sasuke, who hadn’t quite noticed at first that they had reached Naruto’s place, jostled Naruto against his apartment door and proceeded to nibble along the shorter boys neck line; dipping his head down as his hands fumbled for Naruto’s shaky ones in the darkness of the night.



Naruto didn’t know what to make of the situation at first; his mind was fuzzy and his skin felt tingly in the places Sasuke was touching him. He wanted to make something come out of his throat, a word of protest of being on the bottom so far, probably, but nothing but a strangled moan came up.



Oh, fuck it. If being uke meant feeling like this, then he could deal with it.



Sasuke smirked against the collarbone he had been pleasuring when Naruto’s hands gripped clumsily at his hair and a soft mewl met his ears. The question that followed the pleasing sound only further amused him.



“What are you doing, bastard? Right where everyone can see…” The voice was almost a whole pitch higher than what it should be, practically a squeak.



The Uchiha chuckled, the sound reverberating to Naruto as it scaled along the tan skin. “What? I don’t get to show you off?”



He may be a bastard, but he was kind enough to not chortle again when the skin on the Kyubi vessel’s neck reddened at the retort.



Somehow, in only a few seconds, Sasuke had managed to gently push Naruto away from the unlocked door, open it and shove the other inside.



“Wha--” Naruto stumbled backwards over his crossing feet, grabbing at Sasuke’s sleeve in the process, effectively tugging the taller ninja inside the apartment as well



The room was darker than it was outside, but it certainly wasn’t colder. Or maybe Naruto’s body temperature had just risen when he was quickly heaved against the door again-this time, the inside of it.



Sasuke lowered his head to Naruto’s ear, the blonde hair tickling his nose as he did so, and whispered to him when their bodies were flush against each other. “Better, dobe?”



Naruto growled lowly, but Sasuke betted it wasn’t so much from anger than it was their intimate situation. “Bastard, just get on with it.”



The Uchiha crushed his mouth against Naruto’s and grabbed the thin wrists, pinning the lithe arms above the other’s tousled hair.



A feral rumble slipped past Sasuke’s lips as he felt a direct pressure being forced onto his groin. He jerked his hips forward, meeting Naruto when the other continued to writhe beneath him and buck.



Naruto’s eyes were clouded over with lust, and his vision was still fuzzy, and it seemed to only be getting fuzzier!



His eyes widened before lulling back into their half-closed position when he felt something warm and wet probe at his lips. Opening his mouth, he welcomed the invading muscle and only ground harder against the pale hips returning his force.



Sasuke wanted nothing more than to rip off their clothes and fuck Naruto into the door right then and there, but Naruto’s mouth was so addicting, and that grinding against the fabric pulling around his erection was just so nice…



In between their sloppy, inexperienced kisses, Naruto managed to moan out ‘bed’, or something. It must’ve been somewhat close to that, seeing as how Sasuke nodded and tried pulling Naruto with him as he walked backwards through Naruto’s apartment, trying to reach the bed.



Naruto, who was still holding the kiss nearly fell over when his feet hit a soda can from the previous night. That was the last time he threw a party at his place. Next time, they’d trash the Uchiha mansion.



He wasn’t quite sure when it happened, but somewhere near the end of Naruto’s drabbles, his back had met the soft mattress.



Sasuke swiftly removed their shoes and crawled over Naruto until he was straddling the latter.



He bent down, catching Naruto’s mouth with his own as his fingers groped the hem of Naruto’s shirt, tugging it up.



Naruto gasped for air when the kiss was broken for his shirt to be pulled over his head, but snapped his eyes shut again when that teasing mouth returned so quickly that their teeth clacked together for a brief moment.



He bit his lower lip to stop from whining when Sasuke’s mouth left his. Damn tease.




Sasuke slid down Naruto’s body a bit, grinning uncharacteristically for a second when Naruto moaned as his ass slid against the blonde’s cock through their clothing.



When his feat reached the floor, he wasted no time in removing his off-white shorts and navy blue boxers underneath; acting far too quickly for Naruto to steal a glimpse of anything.



However, Naruto wasn’t at a complete loss.



“Gya!” Naruto was certain his eyes had rolled into the back of his head. Sasuke had slipped over him so quickly that he hadn’t even noticed it happened.



Sasuke smirked, despite his reddening cheeks. He straddled Naruto’s hips and leaned back with his hands gripping the sheets between Naruto’s legs. Legs stretched, giving the other a clear view of his arousal, he slowly began a shallow grinding motion with his ass against Naruto’s clothed groin.



“Aaagh…what…what the hell are you doing!” Naruto tried so hard to not squeak, but, damn, if that wasn’t a major turn on then he didn’t know what was.



Inner Sasu-Perv drooled.



Sasuke’s smirk widened. ‘If he likes this, then I wonder…’



A sly hand reached forward from behind Sasuke’s back to finger Naruto’s bare chest, gliding over the pert nipples he found there, before traveling lower.



“Nng!” Naruto was about to toss his head back when that hand cupped his groin, but he saw red when the hand left and he heard a moan come from the boy on top of him.



He looked up, and what he saw almost made him cum.



Sasuke was still straddling him, still thrusting, but now…



Those pale fingers were curled about Sasuke’s hardened head, flitting over the tip as pre-cum leaked out. His sac was being pushed against Naruto’s arousal as Sasuke’s grinding intensified.



Fucking tease!



Sasuke’s hand was so close to Naruto’s clothed groin…but he just wouldn’t go any closer to it!



“Say it, dobe,” Came a silky, unexpected voice.



Naruto gawked at the other boy for a few good seconds. There was Sasuke, thrusting into Naruto’s hips and touching himself, and yet, there was that cocky smirk!



He gritted his teeth. “No.” He might’ve accepted being uke, but he sure as hell wouldn’t give into that bastard so easily! Even if Sasuke happened to be a very hot, horny and drool-worthy bastard…nope. Naruto could last.



A low, conceding moan sent shivers through his body, and when that pre-cum smothered hand fisted him through his pants, his resolve crumbled. “Shit…Sasuke! God, fuck me already!”



The arrogance was evident in the Uchiha’s voice. “I knew you’d 'cum' around, dobe.”



Naruto mewled softly when he felt feathery kisses being placed around his abdomen while those clever hands undid his fly and practically ripped off the boxers underneath at the same time.




The thought that there was no lube did come across both of their minds…but, hell, they were both too horny to really acknowledge that fact.



“Hah!” A strangled gasp emitted from Naruto’s throat as he threw his head back when he felt a long finger part his ass cheeks and circle his entrance before dipping inside.



Sasuke took advantage of the moment and sucked on Naruto’s neck, leaving hickeys wherever possible. His finger probed shamelessly, wiggling about and picking at the tender flesh.



He slipped another finger in as well, gently moving in and out when Naruto began to rock against the invading digits. A small scissoring motion earned a startled groan from the blonde, which Sasuke rewarded with a pleasant nip underneath the tan jaw.



It was a really strange sensation; having something go literally up your ass, Naruto thought. But he didn’t have much time to debate when something much large pushed at him.



He was about to look down, but was stopped when it suddenly shoved in. It hurt, but it felt so good at the same time.



Naruto gripped at the sheets beside him, screwing his eyes shut. Sasuke grunted heavily, his hands securing the hips beneath him.



He really did want to wait for Naruto’s signal to continue, but that dobe was just so tight…



Sasuke didn’t have to wait long, though, for only moments later did he feel muscles clamping around his swollen cock and a swift movement against his hips.



He smirked, and abruptly flipped Naruto over, pinning him on his stomach with his ass, still encasing his erection, high in the air.



Naruto was clearly about to protest, but a swift thrust from Sasuke had any words bubbling in his mind dying in his throat. Moans and mewls were the only coherent form of communication to him now.



Sasuke leaned over Naruto, one arm supporting him above the other at their sides while the other snuck under the blonde’s chest to grip the ignored arousal.



Naruto hissed when Sasuke’s imperturbable fingers fisted his heated flesh, pumping his shaft and playing with his sac as his erection slid against the sheets beneath them.



Sasuke’s shirt was starting to ride a bit high on his stomach, but he ignored that as he continued his thrusts, continuously picking up the pace and trying desperately to reach deeper when Naruto begged him to so.



He leaned forward, swiping his tongue about the back of Naruto’s neck, loving how the other momentarily bristled at the unexpected touch.



The bed creaked beneath their movement as Naruto dipped his stomach lower and pushed back every time Sasuke shoved back in. The pain was gone, and there was a fiery build churning in his stomach.



“Hah…Sasuke…I’m gonna c-” He howled the Uchiha’s name as his sentence was cut off by his orgasm.



Sasuke managed to grunt out the dobe’s name as he released his load into the other.



They stayed like that for a few minutes, exhausted and worn, too tired to move. Until, finally, when Sasuke finished observing how his cum was trickling down Naruto’s thigh, he pulled out and rolled onto the sheets.



SasSEME!



“Sasuke, my ass hurts!” Naruto whined as he rolled over to glare at Sasuke.



The other simply smirked. “Poor you.”



Naruto stuck his tongue out, but then slowly smiled. “You know, you do kind of look like the uke!”



Sasuke glared. The sad part was, it was true. His shirt was fluffed above his chest, and there was cum splotched in random places about his body. It didn’t help that Naruto was cuddling him all night long, while said moron was covered in his own release.



“Shut up.”



Naruto smiled.



“Happy birthday, Sasuke-bastard!”



UCHIHA SASUKE IS SEME, BIATCH!