The Book of Hondo by shadesmaclean
Summary: 10th Anniversary Edition! Now with 13% more typos! Bored in study hall, they started their own religion, and this one was commissioned to write its sacred text, in exchange for becoming their First Apostle. And so it came to pass, the most demented religious book ever written, an epic tale about nothing. (This book containeth more than thy USDA Recommended Daily Allowance of Irony, Unrefined Satire, and Vitamin X, and may cause random side-effects for those who take themselves, or their religion, too seriously.)
Categories: Non-Naruto Fiction, Non-Naruto Fiction > Original stories, Non-Naruto Fiction > Poems Characters: OC
Genres: Action/Adventure, Fantasy, Humor, Parody, Poetry, Sci-Fi, Supernatural
Warnings: Death, Sexual Themes
Challenges: None
Series: None
Chapters: 129 Completed: Yes Word count: 101461 Read: 61649 Published: 07/08/13 Updated: 16/04/14
Flav 13 by shadesmaclean
Author's Notes:
Ode to Flatulence
’Tis the foul stench that wafts upon the breeze,
A silent-butt-deadly in the morning:
The smell that doth brown and wilt all the trees,
Shouldst come with a Surgeon General’s Warning.
Or a twenty-one bun salute to something that died,
And telleth thee— don’t shoot! don’t light a match!
So thou knoweth someone hath let one fly;
Gas shall come to pass from out of one’s ass,
And so one can tell that all is not well:
Is it a shift of wit or a whiff of shit?
A healthy man canst not make that kind of smell;
’Tis death to all who get a whiff of it.
And a common truth for all ye who belt it:
That he who smelt it’s the one who dealt it.

Dost tha Colonel’s special blend
Of herbs and spices give thee gas?
Thou be levitatin’ when thou’rt meditatin’
With such a mighty wind to pass.
Every time thou hear’st me, thou shalt agree:
Nothin’ floats a brotha like tha K-F-C!

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End Notes:
(Scoot getteth off a good one!)

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This story archived at http://www.narutofic.org/viewstory.php?sid=11125