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Asleep by Acerbitas

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Chapter notes: Written for tao_empress' birthday on livejournal.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Her breath stopped, held delicately like it was caught within a spider’s web. The blood stains had dried against white cloth, countless men and women’s lives tainting Sasuke’s shuddering chest. But all she could see was Lee’s blood, and all she could think was that this devil was mocking her. Dried blood, no longer important to him, a whisper of one more body smashed at his feet. But her chest was wide open, and Lee’s soul gushed from her innards.

They placed his body gently on the table, almost as if he was a hero, chakra bindings shimmering around his arms, ankles, neck, and chest. She felt no sympathy as she gazed down at his lax face, only a heartbeat, a dark and cruel chime. She was still living in this anguished existence, trapped in an endless cycle of death. Haggard, she waited. And everyday they would come, and she would try to stop the blood that would never stop flowing. Their healers were gone, their masters were gone, and what was left was falling like flies. Tenten could still see Sakura’s determined face as she poured her chakra into Naruto’s body. She could still see Naruto as he awoke, grin crumbling as he stared at Sakura’s lifeless shell.

She had not had the chance to trade her life for the man she loved, and now his killer lay sleeping beside her. They wanted her to save him. Lips parched, she whispered the obvious question. “Why is he here?” Her voice was rough and broken. “And why haven’t you killed him?”

They didn’t answer her, because they knew she knew. She also knew she could slit his throat and laugh at all of them as the blood bubbled up from his neck. She knew she could let the insanity out, and let her mind free. Even if the madness brought a disjointed paradise, it would be better than this horrifying reality. But she simply slipped the gauze over her fingers, face blank, and began to work. She was and had always been strong. Those that were not were already gone or buried.

You killed him, she told him voicelessly as she ripped his shirt open, revealing several vicious wounds. And now I’m healing the wounds he gave you. Do you remember him? He used to have a beautiful smile. But that was a long time ago. When we were young, and you made people happy. I thought you were attractive, but you probably knew that, in a vague sort of way. All of us girls did. We were young, and we thought life was beautiful.

But life isn’t beautiful, is it? She yanked the white strips open and examined the first wound, making sure it was not infected or dirty. You thought your life sucked, so you decided to fix that, didn’t you? You didn’t know it wouldn’t just hurt Naruto and Sakura, did you? Well it did. I don’t look at you as beautiful anymore, Uchiha Sasuke. All I see is death, and death is my life. So you see, Sasuke, you are actually my life. One time that would have made me happy.

“Will he survive?”

She nearly jumped at the voice, her hands freezing on top of Sasuke’s chest. “…Yes,” she told the Kazekage, not looking up. “He will be fine. I just wish I had more equipment.” Formalities were over and done with. He may have been the leader of the Sand, he may have been haphazardly been awarded the title of temporary Hokage, but right how all he needed was a simple answer, and she had given him one. Now, she wanted him to leave her alone.

“Good. We can extract all the correct information from him. Do you know how important this is?” Even Gaara’s low monotone sounded threadbare. “Do not screw up.”

“I won’t,” she replied, movements robotic, binding the wound tight and secure. “He should wake up soon.”

“What shall you do when he does?” It was not a question about orders, or procedures. His green eyes were opaque as she looked up to stare into them.

“I shall..inform you.” She ripped a package of disinfectant open roughly. “That’s all.”

“He killed Lee, didn’t he?” That one was not even a question. Gaara’s voice was like rough paper, almost as if the sand that surrounded him had slipped into his speech. He shifted, folding his arms and planting his feet like he wanted to be sure he wasn’t going to lose his balance.

She shut her eyes and gritted her teeth, the barrage of questions feeling almost like a physical attack. “Yes, he did.” She twisted her tongue, reflexively trying to remove the feeling of parchment that went all the way down her throat.

Eyes dancing along Sasuke’s body, Gaara asked softly, “Can you forgive him?” He frowned over the ninja before tugging a matted black lock away from his eyes. “You were very close to…Lee.”

She swallowed, the bitter taste in her mouth persisting. “Why do you want to know this?” This invasion was terrifying her; it was almost like Gaara was attempting to rape her, steal her last reserves and force her onto the floor. Her body was tingling, even though he was merely standing there, unmoving, hands tightly wound around his chest.

Gaara shrugged uncomfortably. “If you don’t think about it much anymore, I shall not bother you further. I guess if that is so, I have my answer.” His gaze traveled over the makeshift hospital. “Excuse my personal questions.”

“The Chuunin exam.”

Gaara froze, half-turned around. There was a pregnant pause. “…Yes.” He managed a nod, mouth twisting downward. “Then. A lot of things happened. Things I regret.”

“You didn’t kill him.” She was evading the question, and she knew it. Sighing raggedly, she totally removed Sasuke’s shirt, ripping it out from under him. “In fact, you made him stronger.”

Gaara shook his head, shoulders coiled and tense. “I could have killed him. I even…wanted to kill him.” The kazekage held an awkward hand out for the shirt. “I can take that.”

She handed him the shirt automatically, fingers pressing against a fierce bruise on Sasuke’s side. “You had a monster inside of you.” Motioning with a bloodstained finger, she pointed. “Just throw it over there in that pile. They’ll clean it up.”

The ruined garment flopped onto a pile of discarded rags and slipped to the floor. It settled itself, its dishonored history lost amongst a thousand others. “I believe Sasuke has one too.” Gaara’s hands gripped the table with a tense force.

She put a hand to Sasuke’s head, feeling his temperature reflexively. He was cold—but not too cold. She didn’t know whether to be relieved, or furious. “He’s killed so many people.”

Shutting his eyes, Gaara turned his face away from her. “So have I. I don’t even remember them all.” He pulled self-conscious hands away from the table. “But I remember Lee.”

“You stopped.” A final attempt at evasion. “You have guided us.”

“What if he stops?” Gaara’s voice was laden with ancient pain.

“It doesn’t matter.”

“So then.” A fake smile broke his face apart. “I am unforgivable.”

“You know that’s not true.” Pressing a wrist to her head, Tenten let out an exhausted sigh. “Look: I’m really busy.” Exhaustion fought her eyelids, and her entire body rose against her. She couldn’t quite remember when she had last slept. “As I said, I’ll tell you when he wakes up.”

Gaara ignored the hint, picking up a swab and clearing away the blood from Sasuke’s forehead. “Will you answer my question again? The right way?”

“Which question?” Her body was a statue.

“His capture will end this war. The fighting is going to cease, and you will be able to go home.” His eyes were bound to hers, and fire glimmered behind them. “What are you going to do when he wakes up?”

Tenten gazed down on Sasuke’s slumbering form, only half-finished with tugging a jar cap loose. Fake innocence slithered over his face, a subtle poison. “I don’t know.”
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