Homophobia affects people in the worse ways, so much hate for something no one can change, Full summary inside (yes it is a Naruto fic).......I just put random characters down thats not all that will be in here ^^
A series of one-shots. You don't have to read each chapter because they don't go together. Don't read if you are looking for smut or something happy.
General Fiction Characters:
Gaara, Sakura Haruno, Hinata Hyuuga, Jiraiya, Orochimaru, Temari, Tenten, Ino Yamanaka
1. Introduction! by ForyourLove
2. First Oneshot by ForyourLove
3. Second Oneshot by ForyourLove
4. Third Oneshot by ForyourLove
5. Fourth Oneshot by ForyourLove
6. Fifth Oneshot by ForyourLove
7. Sixth Oneshot by ForyourLove
8. Seveth Oneshot by ForyourLove
9. Eighth Oneshot by ForyourLove
10. Nineth Oneshot by ForyourLove
11. Tenth Oneshot by ForyourLove
12. Eleventh Oneshot by ForyourLove
13. Twelfth Oneshot by ForyourLove
14. Thirteenth Oneshot by ForyourLove
Introduction! by ForyourLove
I thought that it would be nice to do a one-shot for each one of these problems listed below. Though I am willing to write a one-shot for all of them if I have to I would LOVE if anyone else would like to pick one and do a one-shot themself.
In fact that would be AWESOME if others would be willing to get involved with this, if not then I will continue on my own with or without reviews or help because I feel its something that should be written.
*I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian. (Done)
*I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
*I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights(Done)
*We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.(Done)
*I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room. (Done)
*I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
*I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again. (Done)
*I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.(Done)
*We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.(Done)
*I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
*I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman. (Done)
*I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
*I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
*I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.(Done)
*I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
*I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual. (Done)
*I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.
*I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.(Done)
*I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. (Done)
*I am the person who is afraid of telling her loving Christian parents she loves another female.(Done)
First Oneshot by ForyourLove
A long yawn breezed through her lips as her shoulder's rolled back to release some of the tension that had been building up in her shapely frame. After a moment reality set back in as she shook the grogginess from her mind and propped her chin on her open palm and stared with wide eyes, to keep from falling back asleep.
A lazy leer pulled up the side of her mouth as she raised a neatly kept brow, a small girl with long brunette hair had just ran into the class. Her cheeks were flush, eyes wide, and mouth parted slightly as she panted to catch her breathe.
The teacher turned slightly from the chalkboard and sighed, "Tenten, you're late...is there any good reason for this?" Placing her hands on her hips as she stood straight and took in one deep breath the girl shook her head then exhaled before finally speaking.
"No Mr. Umino...I'm sorry, I just got here late. I'm sorry." Her light brown eyes looked to the teacher's with a sincere apology as he sighed and waved her back.
"Its alright Tenten, I can understand just take your seat." The teen nodded with a bright smile now on her face as she turned and headed for her seat.
For the remainer of class no one really said anything as they stared ahead, half the class attentive and taking notes while asking questions wilst the other half looked half dead with drool leaking out of the corners of their mouths, eyes heavy and fogged over. When finally the bell rang Temari slowly pulled out of her seat and sauntered over to the girl's desk whom had been late to class. "Hey." The blonde let the words roll from her tongue with a seductive purr.
Tenten looked up with a small smile as she pulled her bag out from under the desk and packed it with her books, "Hello Temari. Whats up?" she asked politely after finally packing her bags and making it half way through the door with the blonde trailing her closely.
Walking down the hall a light blush decorated the brunette's cheek as Temari's arm hooked with hers. "Nothing much my little fighter, just thinking about you." Quickly Tenten recovered as she jerked her arm away from the slightly taller female and hissed.
"What if someone saw us Temari? You know my family would freak...I can't afford to...um...come out now."
The blonde's eyes narrowed as her hands came up to her hips as she stopped behind the brunette that was opening her locker. Tenten felt the eyes boaring into the back of her skull as she finally opened her locker and started pulling books out while placing another one in. "Temari, I'm sorry I just..." She was cut off as a half growl came from behind her.
"You just aren't ready to fully commit is all. You don't want to be with me so you wont tell your,"
"Damnit Temari! We've been through this before." The brunette was half desparate as she slammed her locker and turned to her girlfriend, thankful the hall was clearing since the bell would ring in one minute. "I want to tell my family...but if I did you know I would be shamed, or worse. I can't take that now and I don't want our relationship to be anymore strained then it is now with all our sneaking around."
Green eyes glared at her through thick silky bangs as the other's mouth parted, "I understand Tenten...I just don't want to have to hide anymore, I don't see why you can't understand that. It wont be all that bad. I started with my mom...they tend to be more understanding. Tenten...I can't be with you anymore...not until we can actually be together."
Temari turned and walked away, fists clenched at her sides as she stomped off to her next class knowing she would be a bit late. Tenten stared at the retreating back as tears swelled in her eyes, she felt like the rest of her turned to an unstable blob of mush as she trembled a bit, tears swelling relentlessly behind her lids causing larges tears to brim over and stream down her heated cheeks.
Her mind scrambled for words, for thoughts, anything solid that would keep her there but nothing came as she stared down the empty hall, slowly she felt her heart crumble in her chest, each piece of it echoing through her now hollow shell as it crashed onto her hopes and dreams now destroyed.
It seemed like an eternity of minutes had clicked by as she stood frozen in the hallway, mind in a silent shock, until she callopsed onto herself and fell into a heap of flesh that hundled into a small ball. Not long after her self-defeat she had been found and taken immediatly to the nurses office. She said nothing the whole time she was kept in the counsilers office after it was determined she wasn't physically ailled. When finally the office had given up her mother had arrived, her face etched with worry and confusion.
"Tenten sweety whats wrong? You can tell me baby." Her mother cooed as she brought her disillustioned daughter into her strong embrace. Sobs crept through the drained teen as her arms hung limply at her sides, she didn't know what to do or say she just wanted to be home in her bed to think, to be alone.
"Please take me home mom. I just want to sleep." the only words to wheeze through her chapping lips as her elbow came up so her arm could wipe away the glossy tears that stained her cheeks.
Her mother nodded with a half knowing smile as she wrapped her arm around her daughter's shoulders and kept her close as they walked from the building. As they walked to the car her mother's freehand came up and fingers lovingly brushed away the long bangs that were falling in her daughter's vision, "You can tell me anything Tenten....I will help you with anything. Just don't be afraid." She smiled as she spoke letting her fingers rest for a brief moment cupping her daughter's cheek before falling back to her side as she helped Tenten into the car.
The ride was silent, opting to keep the radio off in case Tenten felt compaled to tell her anything during the drive and didnt' want it to be a distraction. Staring out the window as the world past by in a blurr Tenten felt part of her mind brighten as she took to heart what her mother had said as they left the school. "Anything?" the teen asked as she slowly turned to face her mother, with a grief-filled hopeful expression.
"Anything what dear?" her mother asked with a raised eyebrow, half relieved her daughter was starting to speak.
"Anything, I can tell you anything?" her eyes gleamed with need as she leaned closer to her mom and reached out so that her hand was resting on her mother's thigh, loosly gripping the long skirt. A reasurring smile took her mother's lips with a soft glow illuminating her features.
"Of course sweetheart! Anything." She took good measure in turning to nod then turned back to the road.
Tenten's lower lip was sucked in as she slowly knawed on it, 'She will understand...she is my mother, she said she would help with anything...mother loves me so I shouldn't be so worried. She will protect me no matter what.' Taking a deep breathe as she reassured herself Tenten nodded. Her mind almost clear and solid on this thought.
"Mom I'm lesbian." she stated firmly, making sure her mother heard her the first time so she wouldn't have to repeat herself. Before the shock registered on her mother's face Tenten continued, "I've had a girlfriend for about two years now and I love her...she left me today because we couldn't be open and I'm tired of lieing to everyone." she fell silent after that as her fingers pulled tighter on the skirt.
It looked like a torent of emotions swirled in her mothers wide eyes as her knuckled turned an ill shade of white as they gripped the wheel tighter. "Mom?" Tenten's voice was desparate as she leaned closer and pleaded, "Mom please....say something." tears again found their home trailing down her swollen eyes and leaked down her chin.
Another heavy minute passed when suddenly a hand shot over and smacked her cheek then quickly pulled back and ripped her daughter's hand from her thigh as she glared dead ahead. Tenten cradled her stinging cheek as she stared in shock and disbelief, her jaw quivered as ghosts of words tumbled from her lips, tears now raining down.
The car came to a grinding hault outside their house and quickly her mother left the car not even turning back to her child as she stormed into her house and slammed the door shut behind her. Tenten sat their shaking, mind completely blown away. It took a while but she finally climbed out of the car and quickly shuffled to her house and ripped the door open, thankful it wasn't locked.
With soft trembling steps she walked toward the source of her mother's voice.
"No I don't care...............yes now.........its important..........no I wont talk about it over the phone just get home now I don't know how to deal with this myself." With that said the teen heard the phone click then something slam against a nearby wall. She jumped back as her heart stopped its repeated slamming. Not knowing what to do the brunette just stood there frozen in the hall as she heard her mother pace back and forth muttering to herself.
'What did I do?...Why is this happening?', "I'm sorry." the words fell from her lips without her realizing, quickly after the door to her father's home office tore open and her mother glared down at her.
"You are sorry?! SORRY TENTEN?! What exactly are you sorry for? The fact that you just embarassed me at your school for your little drama show? The fact that you are a....a.....a lesbian," the word hissed from her lips as she took another step forward, "Or maybe the fact that now we are shamed and if anyone knows of you no one in this house will be able to live it down. Do you know what this will do to your fathers career?"
Tenten's head shook as she rasped a no. "Of course you don't! You are such a child thinking of only what you want!" The girl flinched thinking her mother's hand was about to connect with her cheek once more but when nothing happened her eyes slowly fluttered open, then blinked as she looked up.
Her mother's fingers were cupping her own face as she sobbed to herself. Tenten took a step forward in a move to comfort her mother but was taken back again when her mother stomped off still sobbing, "Don't you touch me."
'I'm so sorry....I don't know how to change it....I didn't want to be this way....I didn't mean for it to be like this....momma please understand....momma please help me......don't leave me alone. Please.' her eyelids batted wildly, trying to blink back the tears as she choked on her sobs.
Not too much time had pasted when she heard another car's door slam in their driveway, then the front door opened. She stood motionless as she heard her mother confront her father. She stared at the wall ahead of her in the other direction of the voices. The muffled whispers soon became shouting as her mother finally told her father the horrible secret.
"Where is she?!!" his voice bellowed soon after followed by quick banging, which could only be the stomping of his feet. Tenten whipped around as she felt her father nearing. Her body convulsed as fear pulsed through her body. "Daddy I'm sorry!" A harsh crack could be heard as an open hand crashed against her cheek.
"You can not call me that, I am not the father of a child like you. I want you out of my house now! You don't belong here, you don't live here, you will not put a black mark on my life that keeps me from reaching higher.....you aren't worth it."
His words ripped through her as the tears could no longer flow, her body stopped all trembling. Nothing reacted as she stood there in the hall, father only inches from her face as he hissed. Everything was blank, the tears and sobs no longer enough to express how she was feeling, or not feeling, at that moment. It seemed all time had stopped for that second.
"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE NOW YOU WHORE CHILD! Don't you dare come back, I don't care what happens to you from here on out." With that he stepped aside and pointed to the door. When the teen didn't move his eyes flared with rage, his arm snapping out and fingers dug into her arm as he ripped her from her spot and started dragging her down the hall.
Her mind snapped together for a moment as she looked up in horror, "Daddy please! Daddy don't do this! I'm sorry I'll change I don't mean to be, I can stop please daddy I love you please I don't know what to do. DADDY PLEASE I LOVE YOU LET ME-," She felt her head crack into the pavement as she was thrown out of her house.
With wide eyes she looked up to the closed door. She leaped up and ran to the windon, palms slamming into the glass as she screeched, "Please, please, please, please, please, mommy! Daddy let me in I'm sorry I promise I can change." Her eyes caught with her mothers for a moment and her banging stopped as she pleaded silently, "Momma." The whisper fell from her lips as she watched the woman turn and walk away, a scrowl firm on her face.
Tenten's arms went numb as she stared into the window, slowly they fell to her sides as she hiccupped. "I don't know what to do." her voice was weak and shaky.
Quickly night came, she was still standing there staring in the window, face blank and drawn. All signs of life taken away leaving a ghost figure standing there staring in. The cold night air pressed against her skin and played with her hair as it circled, trying to bring her back, trying to bring a smile to her face. Finally even the wind gave up on the teen as she stood frozen in the light of the half moon and two nearby street lamps.
Her eyes flicked to the left as she caught sight of movement, slowly her mother walked toward the door...for a moment hope almost crept into her scattered thoughts....until her eyes rested on the bags in her mother's hands. The door opened with a gentle creak, the screen door was pushed open. Tenten turned with jerking movements, as if her body had turned into metal that was formed together with misshappen parts. Small eyes looked up into her mothers as a frail whisper parted from her lips, "Please."
The bags hit the ground causing a small stir in the dirt, "Leave now Tenten...before your father takes you somewhere for you.....trust me......that would be far worse." The door shut with a slam and her mother quickly stormed through the living room back to the other side of the house.
A single tear caressed her cheek as she stared at the bags. "Alone?" she wheezed before bending over slowly and pulling her backpack over her shoulders then gripping the duffle bag with her right hand and turning.
She walked down the sidewalk, eyes zoned out as her breathing came in raggid pants. She tried to think of places she could go, how she could live now, how she could reach the goals she had set long ago if her life is now all thrown off course.
With a good three hours walk from her parents house to where she found herself Tenten finally sank onto a bench. She sat there sitting alone with the stars beaming and moon smiling. She found no comfort in their attempts to strengthen her.
'I don't know what I did....I can't change who I am.
--I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.--
And yes pretty much all of them will end sad of course, thats how it happens in real life.
You can imagine what happens afterwords, how life can get better afterwords, but thats not what I'm addressing now ^__^
Oh and you might be asking 'Why Tenten?' well I'll tell you. I could sell her better for this part because there can't be to much hate toward her seeing how she isn't really seen much. If it was Sakura or Ino there would be a lot of HELL YEAHS and such and Hinata...well that is obvious *chuckles*
Well hope you enjoyed...tell me what you think! Later!
Second Oneshot by ForyourLove
Well everyone enjoy Cassandra Incognito's chapter ^_^
Jiraya screamed into his arms, clenching his fists tightly praying to whatever god that listened that his friend, nay his lover, nay the love of his life made it through the night. Within the first few agonizing moments of finding Orochimaru sprawled out on the floor Jiraya had flown into action. Phoning an ambulance, preparing a bag to take with them to the hospital, and returning to the raven haired man’s side, and holding his hand until the ambulance arrived.
Oro had smiled so sweetly, an almost unimaginable change from his usual cold personality. It was in that moment that Jiraya knew something was terribly wrong, kissing the man’s cheeks he allowed tears to flow freely for the first time in over forty years of his life. He held onto him tightly whispering into his ear ‘I love you’, and reassuring his lover that the ambulance would be there soon. He promised to be there with him the entire time, to support him in any way that he could. Oro had just nodded his head in acceptance, his breathe coming heavier and heavier.
When the paramedics finally arrived they had pushed Jiraya aside, bringing Orochimaru to the gurney, strapping him in and driving away. Jiraya ran to his car, tightening his seat belt as he followed behind them. Making it to the hospital he arrived just in time to see his lover being rushed into emergency. He shot towards the front desk, asking what room he was being put in.
“Who are you looking for?”
“His name is Orochimaru.”
“What’s your relation to the patient?”
The nurse looked up from her page, a look of disgust playing across her face. Jiraya firmly stood his ground. He had survived over 40 years of persecution for his preferences, 27 of which he had spent with his lover Oro. He wasn’t about to let one prissy know it all nurse tell him what was right and what was wrong.
“I’m sorry sir but we only allow members of the family in to see the patient.”
“That’s bullshit! I am his family!” Jiraya shouted.
Other patients and individuals waiting within the room turned their heads to watch the situation unfold. Eyebrows were raised while staff members began to become antsy.
“I’m sorry sir, but unless the two of you are married, or related by blood there’s no way I can allow you in to see him.”
“I’ll marry him the second that the country allows it, but there’s no way that you’re not going to allow me in there to see the man I love, the man I have spent 27 years of my life with!” Jiraya said, his voice quivering with withheld emotions.
“Sir I’m going to have to ask you to sit down and keep quiet or you’ll be escorted from the building.”
“Just… just tell me when you hear anything.”
Clenching his hands into fists, digging his nails into the palms of his hands to create crescent marks. Jiraya gritted his teeth and forcefully sat down in a chair near the desk. He placed his face into his hands shifting the fingers up to grab a hold of his hair, tugging roughly, and letting out a keening whimper, filled with agony.
He sat for what seemed like hours, waiting anxiously for word of what had happened. Every white jacket, every nurse every single face he saw made his heart clench painfully. Wondering if they would tell him that Oro had taken a turn for the worse, or hoping that they would tell him he had pulled through just fine. Through everything they had been through in all those 27 years, the fights, the betrayals, the make-up sex, and the laughter, they had been through it all together, because they loved one another. ‘I can’t wait anymore… I have to see him.’ Jiraya thought.
The man got to his feet, and walked over to the nurse. Jiraya calmed taking a deep breath. “Please. Just please tell me where he is, I can’t leave him alone like this, he needs me.” His voice quaked while he pleaded.
The nurse looked up into the man’s eyes, seeing the pain, and love displayed so vulnerably. Sighing she nodded her head, “What did you say his name was again?” She whispered.
A grateful smile spread across Jiraya lips, “Orochimaru Otokagure.”
“He should be in room 318, it’s on the third floor. Good luck.”
“Thank you so much. Thank you, thank you.” He said waving as he made his way down the hall.
Running as fast as his feet could take him, Jiraya finally made it to room 318. Taking a deep breath he opened the door, only to find a nurse straitening the sheets on the bed.
Jiraya’s brow furrowed in confusion. “Can I help you?” The nurse asked sweetly.
“No, well, sorry, I think I’m in the wrong room.” Jiraya answered backing up and heading for the door.
“What room are you looking for?”
“Well you’ve got the right one. Who are you looking for?”
“His name is Orochimaru and-“
The look that crossed the nurse’s face stopped Jiraya mid sentence as his heat clenched painfully. The look of sympathy in her eyes sent terror running through his veins.
“I’m sorry sir, they should have told you at the front desk but, well, he passed away an hour ago sir.”
“No. No he didn’t. I’m sorry I just got the wrong room, I’ll just go find the right one now.” Jiraya said shaking his head and opening the door.
“Sir please wait! I’m sorry but the man you are looking for is dead.” She said sympathetically while placing a hand on his shoulder.
Jiraya opened the door, looking at the number etched on the surface… 318. He rushed back into the room. ‘It’s a joke, its all a big joke. Orochimaru has been known for playing cruel little jokes on me. That’s it, it’s all a joke.’ He thought.
“Ha, ha. Very funny Oro. Now get your ass out here so I can kick it.” He growled. “Come on I know your hiding somewhere, or you’re probably taping this. Now your little game is over, come on out.” He said walking over to the bed.
“Sir. This is no joke. Orochimaru Otokagure passed away approximately 65 minutes ago.”
“Why, but I wasn’t here… how?”
“He had a heart attack, he made it to the hospital just fine, and we managed to revive him for an hour, but he relapsed. The second one killed him. I’m so sorry sir, was he your friend?”
Clutching the sheets Jiraya looked down, envisioning Orochimaru waking up, having survived the heart attack looking for him to be there. Searching for him frantically, thinking that he had abandoned him, that he had left him to die all alone. Orochimaru had died… he had died alone. He knew in that moment Oro didn’t die from a heart attack, it was heart break.
With his back turned to the nurse tears streaming down his cheeks Jiraya answered, “Yes. He was my friend. My best friend.”
- I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.-
Third Oneshot by ForyourLove
This chapter was done by LathianZeal
I think I have lost my language.
Whatever I’ve said, I deny.
I think I have lost my way.
Whatever was missing is gone.
I let my Focus Shift.
He stood in the doorway of the room, hands clamped tightly onto the frame to keep himself from becoming unbalanced and falling forward. His eyes stared past the nurse, locked onto the form on the bed, as if urging it to rise, throw off the monitoring equipment and the sheets and proclaim it all a joke. But Naruto knew better. No, he would have never voluntarily shaved his head for anything. Naruto turned a questioning look to the nurse in the room, and it nearly broke her heart.
“I’m sorry. The truth is, we just don’t know.” The nurse said without prompting or preamble.
“We’ve done all that can be done to deal with the damage, but his intracranial pressure is still dangerously high. If it doesn’t come down soon, it could cause permanent damage. That’s our primary concern, but a myriad of other problems could develop.” She continued, casting the blonde boy a delicate look. The entire hospital staff had sworn to do no harm, and anyone could see how the boy was hurting over the fate of his friend.
A shuddering sigh, one that spoke of inconsolable misery and resignation followed. “I understand. Please contact me if anything changes.”
“Of course.” The nurse agreed readily. “You’re welcome to stay here if you like.”
Naruto squared his stance away and released the doorframe, then turned. The last the nurse saw of him that night were his blond locks dancing back and forth under the fluorescent hallway lighting as he shook his head, before he turned and walked away.
The nurse looked at the form lying insensate on the bed. She made the appropriate notations on the chart, replacing it on the holder at the foot of the bed when she was through. She left the room and dimmed the lights, closing the door behind her as she went.
Her walk to the locker room was quick, and her visit there was equally brief. She hadn’t been home for twenty-eight hours now, and all she could look forward to was sleep. On her way out, she informed the night attendant that the patient’s condition in room 417 was unchanged. The attendant jotted it down, then bid the nurse farewell as she exited through the sliding doors. The attendant had taken hasty notes for other doctors before especially when said patients were in the ICU. That all changed when he looked down and saw the name of the patient on the list of people the director wanted immediate notification about if they were ever admitted. He scrambled for the phone and punched the automatic dial for the director’s home phone. It rang for a heart-stopping minute before a sleepy voice picked up and grumbled a greeting.
The night attendant said only one thing. “Ma’am. Hyuuga Neji was admitted tonight.”
He could feel the nervous energy pulling at him, nipping at him just underneath his skin. Everything around him was unnaturally bright, especially sharp and clear, and he knew without checking that his eyes had changed. His jaw shifted to accommodate his lengthened canines. He felt them settle against his gums like they’d always belonged there, and his heart thrummed in his chest. His throat worked and the metallic taste of adrenaline washed over his mind, his sense of taste heightened considerably.
Normally Naruto would be afraid of himself. This was a part of him that he kept under lock and key. He wasn’t sure if it was a direct result of the Kyuubi, or if he’d always had a darker side, and it merely took advantage of the kitsune sealed within him to manifest itself physically.
His head cocked back and he examined the sky. The moon hung low in the sky, fat, brilliantly opalescent and ringed with translucent clouds of vapor. His nostrils flared, and just like that, he was gone into the oppressive gloom of Konohagakure.
Normally Naruto would be afraid of himself. But tonight he and his inner monster were in full agreement. His monster wanted blood, and he himself was all too happy to oblige.
And his personal demon gave him the power to get it.
“He’s going into V-Tach!” One of the nurses announced.
“Not responding to de-fib.”
The door opened and Tsunade entered. “Push lidocane hydrochloride and epinephrine, then shock him again.”
A nurse scrambled to get the medication administered and dropped the syringe in her haste. Tsunade calmly scooped it up and pressed it home into the injection port in Neji’s I.V. before discarding it into a convenient sharps bin. All of the nurses could recognize the look on their boss’s face. Anyone who didn’t do their job as competently as possible would be relieved of their post immediately. And they knew Tsunade would make certain they’d never work in medicine in this or any other country, ever again.
Tsunade stepped in over the nurse manning the defibrillator and pressed it down. It squelched in the gel, and Tsunade called for everyone to step away. The resulting shock resounded with a thud in the chest cavity of her patient, and her ears were filled with the steady beeping of the heart monitors.
“Sinus rhythm re-established.” One of the nurses said. Tsunade nodded and left the room.
Honestly, she expected to find Naruto here, watching over Neji. She’d known about them as an item for a while. The blonde couldn’t hide anything from her that she didn’t want to know.
And right now she wanted to know where that damned boy had gotten to!
Said blonde in question watched a gang of toughs malinger about in an alleyway, passing something back and forth. Something that smelled repulsive to him, but at the same time, drew him here. As he watched, the gang laughed as one and one of its members toppled backwards, shoved down by the rest. Naruto got a clear look at the object they were passing around, and in the next second he dropped into their midst and scattered them like a bomb.
It had been Neji’s hitai-ate. In that instant, Naruto threw his dream of being Rokudaime out the proverbial window. And in the next, he threw one of the straggling gangers through a physical window with an elbow to the solar plexus. The glass tinkled pleasantly, and Naruto growled in harmony with the Kyuubi as he scooped Neji’s hitai-ate up and bounded off into the night to chase the fleeing men through the streets of the labyrinthine city.
The reports were still piling up. Tsunade refused to even look at them. Shizune brought them in, stacked them neatly with the rest on her desk, then left.
‘Really, the only reason I haven’t burned the damned things is that they’re not all here yet.’ Tsunade thought. She’d waited for Naruto all night outside Neji’s room, certain that he’d come back at some point.
So, knowing Naruto as well as she did, it really should have been no surprise that she’d found the blonde covered in blood and draped over a chair in Neji’s room, sleeping the sleep of the dead. With nothing to do about it, she’d ordered Naruto cleaned and put into a bed, then retired to her office to get roaring drunk and sleep for a few hours.
Apparently Tsunade had not known how tired she was, because it seemed like she’d barely sat down before sleep had claimed her. Shizune had found her in the morning, facedown in a spreading puddle of drool on her desk that had ruined her ink blotter.
With her, Shizune had brought several reports from ninja who’d discovered body parts scattered across town, and as the morning expired into the afternoon, more reports began to surface. Naturally, Naruto was responsible.
’Just what am I going to do with him?’ Tsunade lamented. She understood why he’d done it. These people had potentially taken his most precious person from him. That was something he could not abide, something that his nindo would not let go without repaying it in kind. And he had.
“You know, I wonder if he even realizes he’s just given up his life-long dream for him.” Shizune pondered as she dumped another armful of scrolls onto the desk.
Tsunade just shook her head and examined her hands like they could tell her the answers if she looked hard enough.
It was three weeks before Neji awoke. Naruto had been awake for two and a half. During that time, the blonde had resolved himself to his new life. There had been no way of knowing how badly Neji was damaged, if he was even Neji anymore, let alone if he’d ever awaken.
Naruto hadn’t been there when his lover had come around. He’d been in the cafeteria shoveling down a tasteless plate of hospital cuisine because Tsunade said if he didn’t eat, she’d made sure he received his nutrition in the form of suppositories. And while Naruto might’ve been happy to drop trou for Neji, there was no way he was doing it for Tsunade-obaachan. With that in mind he’d trudged out of the room he’d held vigil in just often enough to eat twice a day, and use the restroom.
Neji’s eyes opened onto a white-washed ceiling, and he groaned in pain as the light shot into his eyes and tried to hollow out his skull in tune with the beating of his heart. His eyes screwed shut, and he could feel the tears leaking from under his lids in response to the pain. Slowly, the burning subsided, and he was able to open his eyes. The ceiling was still there.
Neji took a moment to organize his thoughts, using his considerable training to ignore the substantial pain he was in. The last thing he remembered was heading towards Naruto’s place with a couple rental films. He’d touched down from a rooftop in an alley behind the run-down apartment complex, and started for the stairs. Then, nothing.
It was about then that the door opened, and Neji’s head felt like it wanted to tear itself asunder to escape the sudden aural assault it fell prey to.
“OBAACHAN! OBAACHAN!” Naruto shouted, standing rooted to the spot in the doorway, yelling his head off. “HE’S AWAKE!”
It was a somber three days later that Tsunade delivered her final diagnosis, as well as her pronouncement for Naruto’s actions.
“The muscle atrophy from the time you spent in bed, as well as the courses of treatment that were necessary to save your life all compounded the damage that had already been done to your legs. I’m sorry Hyuuga, but you’ll never be a ninja after all this. If you’re lucky, you’ll eventually walk again, but your career as shinobi ends here.”
Neji absorbed the news quietly. Something in his gut already told him that his entire life had been turned upside down. It was just a matter of waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Tsunade turned to Naruto, her face grim. “Naruto, your privileges and status as a ninja are officially revoked. You are to surrender all equipment with an inventory list within a week’s time to my office, and then submit to an inspection of your home and person. Furthermore, you are banned from the usage of any and all ninja techniques. Any violation of this rule will be punishable at the sole discretion of the Council.”
The Hokage’s fašade cracked, and her frown deepened. “I’m sorry Naruto, but you’ll never be Rokudaime now. The Council has my back against the wall. I can’t protect you anymore.”
Naruto nodded, his face solemn, but otherwise unreadable. He looked to Tsunade after a long minute.
“When can you release Neji?” was all he asked.
“Now. All the papers have been signed. He’s due back here once a week on Fridays for physical therapy with me.” Tsunade answered. “Neji, can I assume you’ve already spoken to your family?” Tsunade asked quietly.
Neji nodded. “They don’t want me anymore, Hokage-sama. They consider it a blight on the Hyuuga name that I was defeated in such a way. It is a dishonor to the clan.”
Naruto huffed. “Fuck them. So I won’t be able to change the Hyuuga clan. So you won’t be able to help me. There’s only one Hyuuga I’m interested in now, and I’ve got him all to myself.” Naruto proclaimed. “So, how about it? Move in with me?”
Neji beamed. “I’d like that.”
Tsunade smiled as a tear trickled down her cheek. Naruto always had the ability to find the good in any situation. All it ever took was a shift in focus.
-I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.-
Fourth Oneshot by ForyourLove
This chapter was done by me, sorry ^^.
Thank you all for your reviews!
His eyes searched the room as his pencil tapped impatiently on the desk, 'Why isn't that damn teacher here yet' Just as his thoughts started to mull over the possibilities a wade of paper smacked him in the back of the head, "Hey fagot you daydreaming about that Uchiha's ass or something?" the voice was smooth and deep, that voice could only belong to Neji Hyuuga.
Gaara's eyes narrowed as his fingers tightened around his pencil, head lowing so that his sea foam eyes boar into the plastic shell of his desk. He didn't dare respond, he didn't want to have to fight Neji and his whole gang of friends once more so he had learned to ignore and avoid them all until this one class, 4th hour...what seemed to be the longest class of the day.
Slowly his eyes shut as his foot tapped even with the beat of his heart. "Shut the hell up about my ass Hyuuga." The young Uchiha growled. As he turned with a smirk Gaara's heart caught in his chest for a moment as his breathe hitched, 'Damn it I wish they would just shut up.' Gaara's inner voice roared as the pencil snapped in half, small pieces of wood embedding into his skin as his grip tightened still.
A chuckle came from the reclined Hyuuga as he sneered, "Whats the matter Gaara? Wishing that pencil was up your ass instead?" The red head's eyes snapped open as he quickly bolted out of his seat and surged toward the cold bastard but before he could even reach strong arms wrapped around him holding his arms. Hot breathe panted over his burning ear as a deep soothing voice whispered, "Calm down Gaara, don't let them get to you."
A series of 'Aww's, 'Ooo's, and 'Ewww get a room!' sounded from the room full of teenagers at the scene. Gaara ripped himself free of the grasp and whipped around and glared at the blonde, "Shut the fuck up Uzumaki and keep your noise in your own business." Gaara hissed before heading toward the door.
His steps graceful and almost unheard while his breathing came in heavy pants, almost like hisses. His fingers gripped the handle but ripped back when it turned on its own. His eyes flicked up to the curious gaze of his teacher but before the teacher could ask any questions Gaara stormed past him and down the hall.
Folding his book the teacher simply sighed and looked around the class shaking his head.
Gaara was fuming, fists clenching and unclenching at his sides as his narrowed eyes glared straight forward. He would make a quick stop at his locker pick up a few books then just go home and punch a few walls. Thoughts flew through his mind as his quick steps echoed back to his ears mixed with the soft noises coming from behind closed classroom doors.
It hadn't been Gaara's plan to come out while in school still, especially not in the manner he had but it wasn't something he could change. Living everyday afterwords had kept getting worse until the point that just to relieve some of his pain and the hate that had been building up he had taken up his old habit that left his body riddled with scars of all shapes and sizes all over his body.
His body froze as he finally came to his locker. "Fucking bastards." he seethed as he shut his eyes and stomped over to the locker. He opened his eyes but only enough to focus on the lock as his fingers spun the combination until it clicked. Filling his black messenger bag with his needed books and ignoring the white gel stuff that oozed down the locker door and and dripped off to plop with a squishy sound to the floor.
"They think this is funny, I don't even know what this shit is! And I am not paying to have the spray paint removed either." He slammed it shut and stomped off not even giving the neatly painted words another glance. The walk home would be about twenty minutes and hopefully in that time he figured he could calm down.
A harsh autumn breeze whipped around him as he continued forward, toward his house. Any hope of calming quickly vanished once memories of the past started flooding his vision.
"Hey Gaara." the voice was soft and friendly as a warm arm wrapped around his shoulder and lean body pressed against his as the red head stood in front of his gym locker half nude, wearing nothing but shorts and socks at that point.
"Hello Neji." Gaara's voice was soft and far off as he twisted the cap back on his deodorant and bent over to grab his shirt. Of course they were the only two left in the changing rooms since neither one had a class after words so they could take their time.
"So Gaara..." Cool fingers brushed over Gaara's side as the other teen leaned closer, watching a small blush burn across Gaara's cheeks.
"Hn?" was all the red head could muster before turning to face Neji.
Faster then Gaara could register his body was slammed against the locker and another lean toned body was pressed firm against him. Unable to contain himself Gaara moaned as arms wrapped around him and Neji's face came closer. "You do like me don't you Gaara? I heard a little......tale going around school, about just how much you like me.....Do you watch me Gaara?"
Swallowing the thick thump that suddenly formed in his throat, causing Neji to smirk at the sound Gaara simply nodded. He couldn't think, couldn't breathe, the one he had wanted for so long had him pressed against a locker and was practically breathing down his neck asking him all the question he had hoped were never brought up. His mind was practically screaming.
"What was that Gaara....I couldn't hear you....Do. You. Want. Me?" Neji's nose was so close to the others that he brushed his lightly over the others as he let out a soft plume of breathe that tingled Gaara's skin.
"Yes." Gaara whispered, finally starting to get a hold of himself.
"You sick bastard."
Gaara blinked as suddenly Neji flung himself away and was glaring at him in disgust, " Like I'm going to be with some sick freak like you. What the fuck is the matter with you? *smirk* Just wait until I'm done with you, I'll make you wish you were never born. I am not going to live with people calling me a fagot just because you have some sick obsession with me."
The memory stung and forced bitter tears to rain down his cheeks as he continued forward, now stomping up the lawn to his house. He stormed inside, ignoring the howls from his dogs as he marched upstairs.
He slammed the door shut and flung himself on his bed. Burying his head in his pillow his fist slammed into the mattress. Thoughts of the slow approaching day of graduation tried desperately to bring some happy feelings to the teen, giving him hope that it would all end soon and he could move on.
Then, thoughts of after school, in the so called real life. Would anything really be different? The children that torment him have to have learned it from someone, obviously their parents...the ones that would be running his life.
Everything around him crashed and at that moment all seemed lost, everything was hopeless. He was a void that could never be filled, he would be stomped on and ridiculed for the rest of his life...there would be no help, no hope, no happiness for him.
His eyes narrowed as it finally dawned on him, a way to end it all and finally be free.
Slowly raising from the bed his feet pressed into the carpet, a surreal feeling overwhelming him. It felt as if his body was no longer his, like it was floating and tingling but thats all he could feel. His eyes blinked as he walked toward his closet.
A strange half smile formed on the corner of his mouth as he gripped the edge of the door. Gently pushing it open he looked up and extended his arm up to grab a hold of a white extension cord. Once it was free he turned and walked forward.
No thoughts or feelings swelled in his mind as the soft plop of his feet echoed in his ears. Aware of every single movement and flexing of his muscles Gaara pulled his desk chair underneath his light fixture and stepped up onto it, steadying his weight and then proceeded to tied the cord around the top of his ceiling fan and gave the cord a few rough jerks. The fixture didn't even jiggle.
With a strange smirk the teen nodded and he continued to wrap the cord around his neck. The cold material pressed into his skin causing goosebumps to ripple over his chest and arms. With a series of strong knots the teen tied off the cord.
He looked out the window and watched a few cars pass by, a few small children too young to even be in school play around in their front yards, their cheerful laughter echoing in through the empty shell of his mind.
Without a batt of his eyelashes his legs kicked the chair out from beneath himself.
--I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear--
I know Gaara was a weird choice but I just couldn't help but writing him in...sorry it was lacking in details and such I wrote it kinda fast so that would explain its crappiness >< Next one I write if I have to write one will be better.
Also I figured ending where I did was a good choice, no? I didn't want to get into that too much because you all know how people die ^^
Fifth Oneshot by ForyourLove
This chapter was writer by Crimson Vixen
Tears Of Blood
I really hate living a lie. No really I do. My best friend comes over every once and a while and for that I’m fine but…I can’t tell my parents what we really do behind my closed bedroom door. I’m afraid that they will shun me…kick me out of their home. I Love them and I know they love me…but will they stop loving me if they find out I’m a lesbian? Would they disown their own flesh and blood because I prefer women over men? Sakura says that they will love me no matter what…but I don’t think so. Sakura is my Friend I was telling you about. I can’t tell them…it’s just not possible. After a vigorous bout of lovemaking one day (Vigorous because my parents weren’t home), Sakura confronts me and demands that I let my parents know or we couldn’t be together.
I feel like I have died inside after she tells me this.
So one day after my parents come home from church I tell them. I really did die inside after they told me to get the hell out of their house.
Sakura…I couldn’t speak to her anymore…my friends at school all abandoned me…
So, this is my farewell letter, though I doubt anyone would want to read it…
I love you mom, I love you dad. I just wish you could have seen me for who I really was…And Sakura…I’m so sorry, I loved you with everything that was in me.
You’re loving daughter, and Lover always,
Sakura stood angrily at the pulpit after she read the letter her lover had left her. She gazed through sorrowful and angry tears at the whole congregation.
“You can’t fucking help who you love!” She shouted as she slammed her hand down causing most of the people in the church to jump.
“She fucking killed herself because you wouldn’t except the fact that your daughter was a lesbian! How does that make you feel? I hope it makes you feel Abso-fucking-lutely wonderful!” They threw her out without even a backwards glance. Sakura sat on the cold concrete and cried her eyes out.
“Sakura?” Jaded emerald eyes glanced up shocked to see her best (boy) friend Sasuke Uchiha. It wasn’t common knowledge, just between him and her that he was in love with his best friend Naruto. His parents were Christians and didn’t know he was gay.
“Don’t kill yourself if they find out Sasuke.” She mumbled through tears as she clang onto the raven. Sasuke fought back tears because he knew he could never tell his parents.
They would surely do the same thing they did to Itachi…God rest his soul.
But then again, where was God when Itachi went insane? Where was God when Itachi killed his lover before taking his own life? What Fucking God indeed.
I am the person who is afraid of telling her loving Christian parents she loves another female.
Sixth Oneshot by ForyourLove
This chapter is written by me...
I am sad no one reviews oh well can't expect much from TONFA
One night, it all happened in one night and it was so quick I hardly had time to breathe as I watched all I ever loved being ripped away from me.
So cold, I felt my blood practically freeze in my veins as I sat with my daughter shivering in my lap, both my arms wrapped around her as I hid my face in her hair. Her little fingers clung with a deathlike grip to my shirt. I felt something warm ram into my leg and caused my balance to shift.
Without looking I knew exactly what it was. My left arm flung out then quickly wrapped around my son's back as I pulled him closer. "Momma!" his voice was small and weak as his body shuddered and his arms pulled tight around my waist.
I pulled up running my finger's through my daughter's hair as I attempted to smile weakly before turning to my son who finally rose his head after my fingers gently gripped his chin and forced him to look at me.
"Momma loves you both so much babies." A hiccup croaked through my parted lips as tears rained down my chin making the skin uncomfortable and almost clammy.
"We love you to mommy! Don't leave us please!!!" My daughters voice, strong and determined, yet fragile and unsure at the same time. Her fists pull at my shirt as her face buries into my stomach again. I can barely stand as I sob my apologizes and listen to them flood the small room we stand in.
I get down to my knees and pull them both into my embrace. We stand there for what feels like hours before the door opens and a deep voice vibrates through my whole being, "Kids....its time to go...say goodbye to your...mother."
They scream and cling to me tighter as my face rests on their joined shoulders. "Momma will always be with you.....I'll always be with you my precious babies. Don't forget that....I'll always be with you whether they let us be together or not...I love you both more then my heart can bare...We will be together again some day!"
I kiss their cheeks as two people rip them from my arms. My body is shaking as I watch them being dragged from the room screaming and kicking, calling my name. I fling myself toward them crying their names in return, but before I can reach the door two arms weave with mine and pull me back.
A warm cheek nuzzles my own as the grip loosens, "Sakura......there is nothing we can do. Its been decided. Neji has custody.....for now we have to let them go...but we will keep fighting to get them back."
Ino's voice is soft and sure as I whip around and bury my face in her neck as I collapse into her.
Standing on the outskirts of the school grounds I watch a head of dark brunette hair weave in and out of the play equipment, her face is glowing as a smile brightens her face and laughter rings through her lips. Tears swell in my eyes as my fingers cup my mouth to keep cries from escaping my lips.
My soul cries out my agony as I watch her steps falter and suddenly she is sprawled out over the hard pavement. Her cry reaches my ears and instinctively I surge forward with my arms reaching out toward her, but I catch myself.
I freeze, my jaw quivering as unchecked tears cascade shamelessly down my cheeks, my hands trembling at my sides. I can't even comfort her...I can't, by law, even see her.
My love for a person that happens to be the same sex as me is what lost me my custody of my precious children.
For a long time I tried to contemplate why....why I am unfit to take care of my own children just because I happen to love another woman...I'm still the same woman that raised them to be strong and healthy. None of it makes sense....someone told me to leave Ino and it would all be ok...but how can that be so?
I would still love her and leaving her wouldn't mean that anything has changed in me...so what good would it do to leave her when I love her. It isn't something that is in my control I love who I love and that shouldn't be what looses me my children.
The sound of a bell breaks my thoughts as its harsh urgency echoes in my ears. I look up and see my daughter being helped to the double doors by a few friends. When finally she disappears from my sight my head hangs as my hands cup my face, I sob relentlessly into my hands as I turn and walk back to my car.
When I finally round around to the passenger side and sit I feel an arm wrap around my shoulder as soft cooing comes from my lover. Instantly I lean forward and bury my face in her chest as I wrap my arms around her.
Her fingers rub circles over my back, "We will get them back...I promise." I nod into her flesh as continue to sob.
She is the only good thing I have left and I will cling to her with all my life...she says the same thing everyday...every time I cry and I know she means well but I know so long as I love her I can not get my children back.
I would feel empty no matter which road I choose....and its too late to turn back now. All I want is for someone to tell me why is loving someone the same sex as me the thing that deems me unfit.
--I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.--
Seveth Oneshot by ForyourLove
This chapter was written by UzumakiFluff *thinks thats her penname*
Well enjoy :D
He blinked at the phone in pure bewilderment, his mouth a gape, the distant sound of the dial tone ringing in his ears. Sitting there in his boxers, with the penny saver in hand looking at the “apartments for rent” section.
Lee had his heart set on the little one bedroom apartment, and here was his loving boyfriend of a year, Neji, sitting there in sheer awe.
“She……Hung up on me??” In his mind he thought he had said all the right things and set up the perfect deal, that was until…
“So is this apartment for you and your special person in your life,” the sweet young voice asked on the other line. A smile on his face he simply laughed and nodded as if the lady could see him at the moment.
“Yea…Lee is going to be very excited about this….He’s had his heart set on the little apartment and living in that neighborhood.”
Apparently the word ‘he’ made the world stand still and cut the woman’s vocal cords, the silence was almost deafening.
“Hello,” Neji inquired of the lady, which was returned with no answer, “Ma’am did I say something wrong??”
At that a click was heard on the other line, and the dial tone came into play….Great how was he supposed to explain to Lee that he just let the apartment of their dreams slip away so easily??
Neji groaned out rather annoyed laid back on his bed, Lee was going to show up in one hour hoping to see the apartment that he wanted to live in. Neji should have known that it was too good to be true the perfect apartment, in the perfect neighborhood, for his perfect boyfriend.
Who would have thought that the owner would be such a homophobe, or even prejudice against homosexuals, of course Neji could have said that it was for him and his best friend. It wouldn’t have been a lie, just a little bending of the truth just to be sure that the apartment was safely their’s and then reveal the true nature of the relationship.
He heard the key in the door turn, and Neji jumped from the bed in a haste. Worry written on his face as the bowl-haired young man walked into the room, bright smile on his face. ‘Lee’s back earlier than I thought, ‘ Neji spoke in his head as he looked over at the clock, that read 5:00 pm, the time Lee said he would be back.
‘Or I was too lost in thought to notice the time slipping by,’ he thought as a scowl came to his face, mostly because he still had no reason or answer for not getting the perfect apartment for his Lee. He heard the sound of bag being placed on the floor and footsteps coming over to the bedroom. The door opened suddenly to reveal the green-clad, bowl-haired young man with a big smile on his face.
“NEJI,” he called out as he bound towards the bed and his lover, landing right next to him and grabbing his arm. “Come see the things I bought for our new place,” He insisted with a bright smile on his face, not noticing the scowl that wouldn’t leave Neji’s face, or maybe he thought something like that was a permanent fixture for as long as he knew Neji.
Although when Neji didn’t make a move from the comfy bed he looked back a bit worried. “Neji?”
“Hmm,” was the only response that came from the despondent Hyuuga, who was just watching the fan rotate around with scowl etched on his face. He didn’t bother looking at Lee or even follow where the man would lead.
“Is there something wrong,” Lee asked a bit worried at the behavior of his love, moving on top of him and looking deep in his eyes.
“She hung up on me….when I mentioned that it was for you,” Neji said sadly and rather distantly, his focus still on the fan. “I really didn’t expect it…considering how pleasantly the conversation was going…we were joking and having a couple of good laughs….and then….”
Lee laid down next to his lover and looked over at him, clutching his hand, “That doesn’t matter.”
The response startled Neji and he looked over at Lee with the same bewildered look he gave the phone when the lady had hung up on him. “But you had your heart set on…”
“Living with you.…It doesn’t matter where….Just as long as your there,” Lee explained calmly, as he gripped Neji’s hand tightly and Neji did the same in turn. “Hell if you let me…we can stay here and redecorate….I just want to be with you…”
“Doesn’t it bother you?”
“Why,” I know there are people like that out there….there will always be.”
“But she….with her actions said that as long as we were gay…”
“I know…but that is her problem….if she doesn’t accept people for being themselves she will never rent that apartment and keep up the mortgage…and the bank will foreclose…leaving her with nothing…and us…we will still have each other.”
Neji laughed out softly looking over at Lee, “and you know this how??”
“I just do…but,” Lee jumped up and turned around to look at his lover, “Come on…You just gotta see what I bought!!!”
--We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men--
Eighth Oneshot by ForyourLove
This chapter was written by the one and only atenademon So please give her the praise she deserves ^^
I stay hidden behind a car. It rains and I’m cold. My soul is already frozen and so is my heart. I feel how the wet clothes are sticking to my tired and exhausted body. My blonde hair which is covered by the hood of my jacket is also wet and spreads pathetically its long locks over my shoulders.
I have the impression that I’m pathetic too. Pathetic because I stay hidden behind this car, stalking him and waiting for him to come down from his apartment and see me. I bet he is curious how I found out that he returned from his trip. Not even I know how I did, it was purely coincidence, but I did so I came back to the place where he lives, where I used to visit him everyday and sometimes at night when he would call me, asking for my presence.
Do I still need to tell that after all these months, even if I promised myself that I would let it go, the scar wound opened? Do I still have to mention that now a crater had been formed in my soul? If only he could fill it…
If only he could see me the way I see him and that only if… he didn’t forget about me like I didn’t, or better said how I couldn’t forget about him. All these years since childhood I cared enormous about him even if he had his own life, leaving me behind in the shadows.
The curse of love, the sweet one... I love but I don’t have what it takes to admit it how intensely it is, how passionate or how lustful may it be.
I’m afraid, but this fear comes from the intensity of my feelings? Am I afraid not to be swallowed by the sea of feelings, of unspoken desires and unshared ones?
How can I say that? I already have been swallowed by that sea, I even drowned myself in it and no matter how much I try I won’t be able to get out of it.
I have been already in the heaven of love but I visited the hell of desperation. When he wasn’t near me, desperation always took over and I couldn’t do anything to stop it, to calm myself.
I lived in that desperation because of him No, I don’t blame him for that, in fact I blame myself for my cowardice not being able to say what I was thinking... feeling.
I lived and I still do live a love which costs me everything even if I regret that it hasn’t been an ephemeral love from the beginning.
The truth is that a misery called impossible love struck me, and I didn’t have a choice. All I could do was to burn, to love and to hope that I would survive this plague, thinking that at one moment I would be able to regain my senses and control of the heart. But deep inside me I knew that this wasn’t possible.
And I still hate myself for this, for my incapability of saying what I feel. All I could do was to watch him grow up with me, going to school, passing grades, the things that a usual kid would do. I always have been there when he smiled, when he laughed and when he was happy. Nothing made me happy more than seeing him happy. His smile was my happiness, my strength and my will. That’s why I stood with him even if he pushed me away.
He lost his parents in a car crash, but in the same time he lost even his smile. He became cold, pushing people away from him, they gave upon him but I didn’t, I remained beside him, with him. The smile never showed up and I clanged up to him to see that smile again, to feel that happiness vibrating inside him.
In the end all I could do was to be his shoulder to cry. I still remember those long tired nights when he would call me asking me to come visit him because he couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t sleep back then too, I always consumed my last piece of energy by staying up late thinking if he was fine.
Every time I was with him, my heart skipped beats and the need to tell him my feelings didn’t give me peace at all. But yet, the cowardice and the fear of being rejected were there too so I stood silently with him in his bed with his head rested on my shoulder and listening to his cries and to his regrets.
In a way, people became curious of why was I staying with him up so late or why from all the persons in the world, he accepted me to be his closest friend. There were some arguments about us being something different, something unacceptable for the world. He didn’t understand but I knew what they were thinking because I was the one who listened to their threats, to their complaints that I would ruin the great future which would lie ahead of him. I was still a kid and I couldn’t understand even myself what were those feelings. But they made me understand by making those assumptions about me as being a monster and by threatening me with death.
I could only accept their plans because of fear. But I accepted with my mind, my heart didn’t even listen to that promise, it didn’t even care about what were they thinking.
Years passed and he matured even more, he wouldn’t cry, he would just take care of his job, work and plans for the future. I watched him from the shadows, always trying to hold back my emotions around him, still thinking about the promise. I watched how he would spend his time with women. At least the others wouldn’t threat me anymore that I ruined him. I always thought secretly and believed that he was only mine but when I was seeing him with a woman, my opposite, my heart would hurt and I would scold myself, I would demand myself to let it go, for myself but for him too. But I couldn’t, all of this made the impossible love grow more.
My heart would hurt even more seeing him devastated when he would break up with a woman. His smile would disappear for a while but mine wouldn’t, because that meant I still had a chance to tell him the truth. Now that he didn’t belong to anybody I could tell him and make him belong to me. Thinking at this I could only realize how selfish I could be and how foolish I could be. I was thinking more about my happiness than about his. This meant that I would admit out loud what I was, I would mention that I belonged to a different ‘race’ of human. I would admit that I was attracted to men, the same gender as mine. And this- I couldn’t do it, not only for me but for him too. I just couldn’t stain his image by saying that his best male friend loved him. So I failed again for the uncountable time of my life.
I was happy for him that he moved on and that I still got a chance to see his smile, even if his smile belonged to another woman this time. But as he grew in my eyes, he grew more inside my heart and the desperation of telling him what I wanted since childhood to tell grew also. Every time I saw him I tried to start my first sentence of my long-time confession but I couldn’t end it very well, it took me too much time and too much energy just to say three little words. But more because I was still afraid of those threats.
I always thought of him as a perfect person who I had to manage carefully with, afraid that he would get broken or ruined. Saying those things would definitely ruin him- this, I just couldn’t allow. So I always let him laugh at my red face and at my stuttering saying that I should really get a girl or I would be considered one. And of course all I could do was to laugh at his joke and hear his name being called by his woman asking for his attention, attention which he would gladly give. An attention which I will never receive from him. A one of love.
One year ago, he came to me and told me about a business trip and that he had to go. Back then, he told me that this trip would last over a year or more and probably he wouldn’t return too soon. My heart broke then, I could only watch his face contortioned with sadness and regret that he had to leave his home, woman and friends behind. It was unbearable, life without him would mean death to me. I tried again to tell him but I failed as he told me that he had to leave or he would lose the plane.
I could only nod and wish him good trip and good luck with his work outside our country. Before he left through the door of my apartment he sent me one more last look and I saw something in his eyes, something indescribable for me. I think I saw pain as the one which he went through when his parents died. I couldn’t say or do anything because of my fear of ruining the both of us so he disappeared from my view and from my life without receiving another word from me.
From my life but not from my heart.
And when I thought that nothing would make me the same, he entered again in my life.
I waited two hours for him to show up. It is raining hard, lightnings cover the whole sky, distant loud thunders can be heard from time to time and I stay hidden behind this car just waiting for him, the love of my life. I can even be taken as a car thief because I didn’t move from my spot for quite some time. Why am I hiding? I’m hiding because I’m not sure how he will react. My hands start to shake uncontrollably. I stare at them carefully and I notice that they are cold and red.
Then, he shows up. He is more handsome than the last time I saw him. The same heavy walk, shoulders a little leaned forward, face serious, nothing changed here.
I watch how he comes straight at me, I can see him through the window of the car after which I stay hidden. Did he see me?
My heart rises up to my throat in excitement, I feel the need to hug him, to yell what I feel, to yell out loud that I love him. For the first time in many years, I feel courage, something very strange for me to feel, but in the same time, this courage gives me a deep feeling of strength and ability to do anything- even telling him what was lying in my heart.
He seems surprised but nevertheless he smiles at me in the same way he always did. The smile of my life, the smile which would make me happy anytime
I almost cry in joy but the rain hides my tears. I watch how he raises the hand and how he closes his umbrella. The same old blue umbrella which he burrowed from me a long time ago. But my heart explodes and I can only let out a gasp as my eyes fell on the golden circle around his ring finger. He belongs to someone else now, the wedding ring tells me this. Every thing collapses, the strength, the courage from a few minutes ago disappear as if they have never existed before. Only fear, regret and remorse are there, like they always were, keeping me weak and at their command. Keeping me away from being my true self, away from my true existence.
I can’t say anything and he approaches me. With each step he makes I feel heartbroken. I feel devastated and betrayed.
Seeing his confused face, I smile and I lean my head down. I feel his scent, the same smell from back then. I cried after him and I still will cry after him. I loved him and I will still love him. I will never love someone the way I love him. I still dream about him, the boy with raven hair and cold eyes. My whole existence and life is tied up by his name. How can I break the chain which stops me from living? How can I break the shackles which hurt my soul? How can I set myself free, to love again?
I raise my gaze and look at him and at his smile. Maybe he doesn’t see me the way I want him to see me. I feel how my heart yells frozen and terrified by his beauty. He doesn’t see me. Me, the only one who loved him and will love him for the rest of his life. Me, the only boy who saw his tears and who shared his loneliness.
But it’s my fault that he doesn’t see me. I chose to listen to the threats, to my mind instead of my heart, of my soul which kept yelling his name. I chose to be like the others wanted me to be even if they weren’t sure of what I was. They couldn’t understand that I had a life, that I was still a human being. But I listened to them, and that only brought sadness and grief to my life. Fortunately, I managed to survive, he was with me and that kept me alive, he would just exist and that would be enough for my reason to live.
I cry but I still can’t take my eyes off of his face, off of his smile. God bless the rain drops which camouflage my emotions or else he would have noticed me. Why am I crying? Even the rain betrayed me. I haven’t cried in a very long time but yet, the rain made me feel the salty taste of sorrowful tears of the sad past.
I open my mouth, my lips slowly trembling and I want to say finally the reason of my visit here. I will tell him what I needed to tell him. But I stop, I can’t continue, memories from a distant past keep ravishing my mind along with his beautiful smile of happiness and I can’t think straight. I can’t put my words correctly.
“C-Congratulations.” That’s all what I can say.
--I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.--
Nineth Oneshot by ForyourLove
This chapter was written by me!
Yeah I know *gets a volley of BOOs*
I feel the tears soaking through the thick cotton of my pajama shirt as my fingers clutch tightly to cloth that wraps around his body, his sobbing causes his body to convulse against my own. Shutting my eyes tightly I shift my legs until they are no longer pinned between us in an awkward place that causes me to ache.
I pull him closer, his cheek rests on the top of my chest, his forehead pressed against the bottom of my neck. My other arm comes up from rubbing small circles on his back, my fingers comb through his hair in a repeated motion to sooth him.
A hiccup catches in his throat and sends him into a small coughing fit. When finally the oxygen returns to his lungs he turns and buries his nose in my flesh as his fingernails dig into my arms. "Temari," his voice is stressed and weak as it croaks through his lips, "Why?"
He pauses to take a breath and wrap his arms around me to pull me closer, nails still trying to find some baring...as if he were to hold on to me tight enough his troubles will fade away.
I can't breathe, it feels like my brain is screaming...I can just barely hold back my own tears and sobs as I rest my cheek upon his thick brunette locks. My fingers trail up and down his side as I make soft sounds, like to sooth an infant.
"Why does it hurt so much....why can't I just love him....why do other people even care what or who I love? I thought love was love.....why does it feel like my heart can not beat anymore. Everytime I step outside I feel as if the world is glaring at me, like its not so silently judging me. I don't know if I can take it anymore." Kankuro's eyes are clamped shut, trying to surpress the rage of tears that build up behind.
I rock back and forth, holding him tight with both arms and shake my head. His hair rubs against the bottom of my chin as I shake my head. What do I say? What can I say?....I don't know the answers, I don't know how he feels, everything he is asking is good a question, that I too wish I had the answers to. My heart feels like its constricted in my chest and my body starts to tremble.
Why does my brother have to hide himself from the world and only confide in me? Why does he have to feel so alone and lost? Why can't I find the answers....why can't I help him? Why can't he love who he loves and the world just not give a damn? Why do we even have to ask why.
It feels like my brain is shutting off, over loaded, but I know I can't leave him out here by himself when he is already so alone. I search through my brain for something to say to at least stop his body from trembling so harshly.
"I'm so sorry, Kanky."
Hollow, those words feel so hollow to me...they are used so much its like they no longer have a meaning...they are just fillers so you don't have to face something truly terrible. Fuck why can't I help him, why can't I know what he needs to hear?
I can't change the world and make it better.
"So sorry." Again those words flood through my lips in an unconscious wave, am I sorry that I can't say anything else? Is that what those hollow words are trying to say?
No longer can I hold it back. I feel the tears burn down my cheeks as my trembling fingers weave through his hair and another fists his shirt once more.
I feel a small tingle of warmth on my upper arm, slowly my eyes peel open and look. Through the slits of my window blinds the morning sun starts to shine through.
That to is hollow, it offers nothing to us but bitter warmth and false happiness. It smiles with no real feelings, its trying to numb us to the pain and make us hide. For a moment I almost fall to its call but I find myself quickly and snap my eyes shut and bury my face in his neck.
--I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights--
Yup well I hope you all enjoyed enough to review?
Tenth Oneshot by ForyourLove
*sighs and fidgets* Its been so long since I have written for this series....This oneshot wasn't very good I don't think...I could have added something to it...I dunno...should have made it more emotional or something instead of being so dry...but oh well *shrugs*
Hope you "enjoy"
LET THE ANGST-FEST CONTINUE!
Thank you Akina for inspiring this and helping me come up ideas~ and cracking a whip to make me write @_@
It's so loud in this metal box I can barely even hear my own raggid breathes, its like the sound is pulsing through me in place of my heartbeat, which I can no longer feel either. Is that because it truely has stopped...or is it just so loud in here I can't sense anything. I shut my eyes and shake my head.
Zabuza where are you? I can't feel you near me...whats going on again? Why is it so loud?
A sharp pain shoots through me, my finger's grip whatever is below me as a pained gasp floods through my lips...lost the the sounds of the wailing from all around. "Hold on ma'm! We'll be at the hospital in about eight minutes!" My hazy eyes fling open in alarm as I feel a hand press into my chest. My head rolls to the side and I take in the sight of a man leaning over me, blood lining his gloves and parts of his long sleeves.
Tears stream from my eyes. "Zabuza." I cry harshly as my mind takes back control of my body and I start to remember what is going on, start to really feel the pain.
"Zabuza will meet you at the hosiptal ma'm. Don't you worry." There it is again, ma'm....its almost comforting yet somewhat bitter to my ears. A sloppy smile etches my face as my head lulls back to the other side. I managed to save him, my precious Zabuza, by letting the bullet take me instead. It is a decision I would make any day no matter what.
I must live, for him....I must stay by his side to protect and watch over my precious Zabuza. My time hasn't come to an end yet.
Feeling something heavy and wet pull from my body I look down and see a blood soaked cloth being thrown back as another takes its place, but not before more blood gushes forth. The concerned look on the man's face as he tries to save me is comforting as my eyes slid shut.
My body already feels like a burning carcuss but I know I can make it and I'm not going to give up. A vague ripping sound echoes through the small metal box as we take a sharp turn left and the tires of the ambulence hit some kinda pothole. I feel my shirt being gently taken apart, for what I assume is to give better view of the wound.
"Oh fuck no." a disgusted growl from the man saving me enters my throbbing ears. What does that mean? Slowly, with what feels like the rest of my strength, my eyes flutter open and with groggy vision I see the horrid sneer curling up his lips. His eyes, which had just been filled with compassion and determination, now look to me as if a I were some waste that had landed on his new shoes.
He stands up and backs away from me. Finally, after all this time, I feel my heart slam against my chest and my muscles stiffen. What is he doing?! Tears over run my face as words attempt to crawl out of my throat to call to him.
Please, oh please don't leave me here like this. I feel blood start to wash over my sides, a slow tingling flows through my body. Its like its all going into a painfull sleep. My weary eyes watch with flowing tears as my chest heaves with the attempt to make pleas.
My finger's twitch in my attempt to reach out to him. I watch as he walks toward the front of the ambulance, his eyes still boaring into me. A sob cracks from my throat, mingled with the only word I can manage to form, "Please,..." Again my eyes fall shut, my mind tries to force on my body...tries to stop the blood from leaving me.
Zabuza's face flashes in my minds eye, once more a heartwrenching sob echoes through the space around me.
"What the hell is going on?!" I hear a voice from the front, different from the man who abandoned me.
"I'm not working on that abomination back there. Let it die." the harshness of the voice bites into me.
It.....that.....abomination...?.....Oh...thats right. Me. He is talking about me. My body trembles, or at least I'm assuming it does as my vision beings to tremble as the creaking of the stretcher below me rips through the air.
"What the fuck are you talking about?! GET BACK THERE AND SAVE THAT GIRL!"
I hear a snort, the sounds of the wailing siren is now but a dull roar as I have gotten used to the sound.
"That ain't no girl. Thats a he-she. A fucking freak, there is no way I'm saving it. It deserves to die."
Tears stream down my cheeks as my lips quiver. No...I'm not a freak...please....don't leave me...I must get back to Zabuza, he will be lost without me...wont he? Yes....I must hold on.
"Its not up to you to decide whether someone lives or dies just because you don't like their life chooses, get fucking back there and keep working on him!"
Yes, oh thank all the stars in heaven, a new sense of hope washes over me. I hear the dripping of what can only be my blood as its scent starts to assault my nostrils. I can't have lost that much blood right? I can barely feel my body anymore, where is that man? Isn't he coming back now?
"Fuck you Johnson, I ain't touching it." The slow almost sluggish beating of my heart freezes. No
"Fine then asshole, you drive and I'll go back there!!"
"I told you I'm not helping you save that thing."
"YOU FUCKING PRICK! You can't let him die!"
"Then I suggest you drive faster."
I can no longer hold my eyes open, how long have I been here? He said eight minutes till we got there...but wasn't that yesterday?...no that can't be right....Time has fallen from me, haven't I been here ages. How long must I feel myself dying? I'm not ready yet. Sitting here listening to them argue over my life causes a feeling of uselessness to raise up in me, I haven't felt this way in so long it aches.
How is it that I have to lay here and wait to to be rescued, what have I ever done wrong? I've only loved one man, I've done all I could to make that man happy, and I'm not done yet. I can't just lay here and die.
Why...why.....why is he doing this? I refuse to apologize, I refuse to say who I am is wrong.
My body shifts on the blood stained sheets below as I hear the screech of tires on pavement, he really is going faster. A morbid smile slowly creeps across my face. That poor man, driving this thing, I'm probably causing him more stress then he should have to endure. I vaguely hear his deep rumbling voice continue to roar out profanities and curses to his partner.
Everything is dulling, now its like my whole is made up of nothing but a soft throbbing. I'm fading, but I can't...not yet.
My last breath wheezes through my lips as my arms slid down to fall uselessly to my sides.
"Sir! Listen to me! That man could have lived! My partner abandoned Haku, right when he started to hemrage. He left the man to die alone. He wouldn't even take over driving so I could go back. Sir, he killed that man!" Johnson cried out as he slammed his fists on the desk before him.
His partner stood a few feet away from him, arms crossed over his chest while glaring at the legs of the desk. A soft growling sound filled the room as the man Johnson was reporting to took into concideration what was just said. "Anderson you are suspended for a week without pay. Don't let something like this happen again, not having your ambulance completely stocked could loose you your job next time. As well as you Johnson for not checking the supplies."
The man's eyes narrowed as he looked to Johnson, said man's eyes widened in disbelief, "Sir you can't be...serious. This wasn't a case of not stocking up properly. Anderson just left that man to die!" The cheif growled as he leaned back in his chest.
"Are you calling me a liar, Johnson? I can have you fired in a heartbeat. I will wash your sheet clean, I will make it impossible for you to get back into the medical profession ever again if you utter a word of this to anyone else. Besides," he cupped his hands together and grinned up at Johnson," Who is going to believe you, a rookie 25 year old with a history of criminal past over me, a well respected chief of 37 years?"
Johnson shuddered in disbelief. They were going to get away with it?
"We're sorry Mr. Momochi...but Haku didn't make it. There was just too much damage to be repaired, there wasn't anything we could do for....him." The tall dark haired man just stares forward at her, like an ice statue frozen in place...his fingers fisted at his sides.
Its a mistake, he thinks...Haku can't die...not yet...not without him.
"Where is he?" the gruff voice of the man hisses through the room.
The doctor bows her head before nodding gently, "I can take you to see his body now. Just follow me."
One would expect the sound of creaking metal to sound through the halls as Zabuza takes rigid steps forward, his body barely listening to his commands.
They make it to the room without incident, the dark haired man makes it to Haku's side...on a cold metal slab.
His arm extends toward the motionless sheet that is laying overtop the love of his life, shaky fingers grip the cloth and slowly, lovingly pull it down over the face of his Haku. "Haku." the breathless sound of his lover's name tumbles from his lips as his finger's trail down that tear soaked face.
Desperation rushes through his body, he gently shakes the body, "Haku!...Not yet...not yet."
The doctor at the door walks over slowly and places her hand on his shoulder, "I'm sorry Mr. Momochi...he is dead...there was nothing we could do."
Zabuza throws his arm back and knocks the woman away from him as he pulls Haku into his arms and rests his chin on the limp shoulder as suppressed tears start to leak out. This shouldn't have happened... this just isn't right. The men that took Haku away said he'd should be fine...didn't they? They wouldn't let him join Haku on the ambulance because they needed the extra room to get around.
"Haku!" he cried as he carefully lowered the lifeless brunette down to the slab and looked to his face with loving tenderness he only expressed around the young man.
--I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual--
Hm...sadly I know this happens D: It doesn't seem very believable but that's just because I fail at writing.
If you didn't get what happened Oo...for some reason. The guy took off Haku's shirt and saw Haku stuffed his shirt and realized Haku wasn't really female...but I was hoping that was pretty obvious.
I didn't know how to end it D: and I suck at writing Zabuza in character ;-; Hope it was decent!
Eleventh Oneshot by ForyourLove
YAY! This chapter was written by Xoteem from AFF
Thank you so much for writing this ^__^
Hope everyone enjoys Xoteem's oneshot!
"Hurry up, Kiba! We're going to be late! Again!"
"Yeah, yeah let me put some pants on." Shino smiled at the visual of his lover half naked rummaging for a pair of pants to wear to their new church. He was confident that what had happened at the church they went to last week wouldn't happen again. Not all Christians were as close minded as everyone thought. Couldn't be. Kiba fell out of their bedroom, dressed finally, pulling on his shoes.
"You can brush your hair in the car. Let's go!"
"Shino, hon, let's not get too excited."
"I told you, last week was a fluke. In the car, now!" As they drove across town, Kiba reflected on what happened last Sunday when they arrived at First Baptist. They had walked up to the doors to find the preacher had locked them from the inside. Shino pleasantly asked to be let in and was met with an adamant no and a shooing gesture. They had left, Shino had nearly cried on the way home. Now they were pulling up to a brick church called United Methodist. They got out of the car and joined hands for the walk to the doors. They got five feet from the doors when 3 large muscular men stepped outside to block them.
"We don't want your kind here. Scram."
"We're only here to worship, like you." Shino said nicely. The largest of the three men stepped forward and cracked his knuckles.
"Don't make me beat it into you. We. Don't. Want. Your. Kind. Here."
"Shino, let's just go. There's lots of churches in this town." They turned and walked back to their car.
The following Sunday, Bethany Covenant was mysteriously full to capacity.
The Sunday after that, Saint Joseph's had a gas leak and had to cancel all services, so sorry.
The next Sunday, at Trinity Lutheran, they actually got to sit down and hear part of the sermon, which they didn't enjoy due to everyone staring at them. When the preacher asked them congregation to rise and pray for the sodomites in their midst, they left.
The Sunday after that fiasco, Mount Zion Methodist was locked and the lobby was deserted, though the parking lot was full.
The next Sunday found Shino as a lump under the covers. Kiba shook him.
"Babe, wake up. We're gonna be late." He heard a mumble. "What?"
"I said, I don't care anymore. They don't want us there." Shino started sobbing. "All I wanted to do was go to church." Kiba curled himself around Shino and cursed all the narrow minded people who had caused this heartbreak in the most wonderful person he knew.
--I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind--
Um...I guess this doesn't meet the requirements for word length so um....
TIME FOR SARA'S RAMBLING TIME!
I don't know how many words this was before so I guess I'm gonna ramble until I KNOW its enough XD
This is the only time today where I don't have IMs open so I could just copy and paste stuff from there...thats really sad to me ;-; *only talking to one person* There are other people online...but I don't wanta talk to any of them...
I'm only talking to my friend...she doesn't have an account here but she has one on fanfiction.net and she co-authors Icha Icha Incident with me, Cassandra Incognito....today her and another writer friend weren't very amused when I kept making fun of canadians...(they both are canadian's obviously) but I was only doing it for pure humor.
I really want to go home but I can't *sighs* Long story I'm not telling any of you because NO ONE CARES even if you do, I'd have to shoot you if I tell you where I am ~_^
Right now I really want a Ring Pop...I don't know why I just do...I'm 19 and want a ring pop so badly I'd probably rob a little kid if they walked past me right now with one...which is HIGHLY unlikely so I'll live.
XD I just remembered...everytime my friend Akina signs on the band "Dying Fetus" starts to play...any song its never just one song its just that band comes on whenever she does...I find that hilirous.
Ok if this doesn't meet the requirements I'm strangling me someone.
Twelfth Oneshot by ForyourLove
This chapter was written by Hanyou-elf!!
Hope everyone enjoys!
Affection is for the Weak
Sasuke smiled at the teenager who walked in. He was a handsome young man, a son he should and was proud of. Growing up in a single parent household was never easy. But growing up with Sasuke as his father had to prove hard. But Fugaku was well adjusted, intelligent, and he'd learned to handle his father's unusual behavior.
Sasuke loved his son more than anyone else. He would never admit it to the younger Uchiha, but he truly did. Sasuke loved few people, and those he did love were protected by his powerful name. Sasuke's wife, Fugaku's mother, had died. She left them alone and Sasuke was left alone to raise their son. But it was okay. He was strong enough to handle it.
“Dad,” Fugaku asked softly, dropping heavily onto the couch.
Sasuke looked at his son again. Worry filled him as he took in Fugaku's appearance. His handsome face looked tired, worn. He was exhausted. His very presence gave off the vibe of sadness, of mourning. It was something he hadn't seen in years, since Hinata had died.
“What's wrong?” Sasuke asked gently. He laid down the papers he'd been holding and shifted on the couch to look at his son.
Sasuke watched as Fugaku's face practically crumpled. Tears poured from his dark eyes. He wanted to wrap his arms around his son's weeping form, but he couldn't. He couldn't. He could not let Fugaku see his desire to protect his son. He closed his eyes against the sight and ran a hand through his dark hair. His only son was breaking and Sasuke couldn't do anything.
“He's dead, dad.” Fugaku grabbed a pillow from the couch and he wrapped his arms around it. Sasuke could see the need for comforting, the need to be held, but he couldn't give it. He could not hug his son. The younger Uchiha buried his face in the pillow and cried freely. “I couldn't... I wasn't there.”
“You're... boyfriend?” Sasuke asked slowly, hesitating to say that word. He couldn't understand Fugaku's willingness and eagerness to pursue a relationship with another man, but he wouldn't stop his son either. After all, he understood what it was like to want something you couldn't have. The desperation and the devastation when it was forced out of your life. Sasuke understood that.
“He's dead,” Fugaku sobbed softly into the pillow.
Sasuke wished for the strength to reach out to his son and pull him against his chest. He wanted to hold him and comfort him, but he couldn't. He could still hear his father's voice in his ear.
Sasuke sat before his parents with his head bowed. He knew they both thought he should be ashamed of himself, but he just couldn't be. He was only fifteen years old, he couldn't help being curious. Especially when it was somebody like Naruto.
“Do you realize how disgusting it is to be caught like that with a boy?” his father roared. Black eyes were narrowed in anger, his hands fisted at his side as he paced angrily. “It makes you a faggot. A fairy, a ponce, a girly-boy, a wuss, a bitch. It makes you gay.” he finished with a soft snarl. His mother, usually so kind and gentle, said nothing.
Sasuke didn't get a chance to react before a fist hit him. He fell over from the impact of the punch, surprise and shock coursing through him. He didn't get a chance to recover before his father attacked him. Sasuke could only curl in on himself as the punches rained down around him.
When his father was finished, Sasuke was shivering, crying. He couldn't think straight. He felt broken, beyond repair. And it was all because his father had caught him giving Naruto a blow job.
Sasuke grunted as his father grabbed a handful of hair and lifted his head. In a breathy snarl, he told Sasuke very softly, very menacingly: “You do not show another man affection. You do not kiss him. You do not hug him. You do not hold his hand. And you most certainly do not suck another man's dick!”
His head was released and Sasuke fell back to the floor he'd been laying on. Before darkness took him, he saw his mother, sitting stoically, approvingly.
Sasuke bowed his head, closing his dark eyes painfully. His father had beat it into him. Sasuke was never allowed to be close to another man. He'd been thrown into sports and reminded that he wasn't allowed to do anything but passingly touch another man.
And he'd never seen Naruto again.
When he'd met Hinata, he relearned how to be human again. He stopped being the sports oriented asshole his father had made him into. And when Fugaku was born, Hinata made him swear that no matter what their son did or wanted, Sasuke would love him regardless. Sasuke would never go back on that promise.
When Fugaku had brought a man home, when he'd told Sasuke that he was dating him, the elder Uchiha had smiled as much as he could, he'd nodded and accepted it. His son was happy with his hand in another man's hand. And Sasuke wasn't going to take that away from him. But right now, he almost wish he had. If he had protected Fugaku from this relationship, then he wouldn't have to deal with the pain his son was in today.
“Fugaku,” Sasuke murmured softly. He reached over and gently touched his son's hand, allowing himself to show no more affection for the younger man. “It'll be okay,” he promised softly.
“He's gone dad,” he whimpered. “Will... will you hold me, please?” he asked desperately.
Sasuke loved the fact that he'd been able to raise a child that was so completely different from the expected behavior of the Uchiha bloodline, somebody who was actually really human. Fugaku carried on their bloodline, and he was caring. He liked to be around other people, liked to be social, liked to be around people. And he was secretly fond of the fact that he'd been able to allow his son to pursue his relationship with the other boy, especially without the fears that his father would attack him for allowing such a weakness to show.
“I can't,” Sasuke whispered. It was too hard to hold him. If his son had been born a daughter, he would have held her. But Fugaku was a man. He'd been born a man, and he had to act like a man. He couldn't allow the younger Uchiha to know how much he wanted to hold him, to know how much he wanted to comfort him, but couldn't.
Fugaku knew that no matter what, his father loved him. But he also knew that no matter what, Sasuke would never openly show that to him. So he would have to settle for the hand on his own hand. He would have to settle for the soft words that had left his mouth. He would have to be okay with the fact that Sasuke would never be able to be for Fugaku what Hinata would have been able to be. What somebody else would have been for him.
Fugaku's dark eyes looked up and glared sadly at his father. “Excuse me dad,” he murmured softly.
Without waiting for his father's answer, he threw the pillow back onto the couch and ran from the room. Sasuke pulled his knees to his chest and bowed his head. He couldn't be what Fugaku needed, not in this one moment of pain, in this one moment of desperation. And it was his father's fault. There were hot tears in his eyes as he struggled to try to talk himself into going after his son. But his body wouldn't move.
After all, a man did not show affection for another man.
--I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men--
Thirteenth Oneshot by ForyourLove
This one is written by me cause holy shiznit this thing got a review and that scared me XD YAY motivation, thanks MewMew2
Um, no one is on to beta this so...sorry for whatever mistakes and such will come.
Finger's run down a pale, lifeless cheek as another tear rolls down the mother's face.
"It shouldn't be this way." the mother mutters outloud followed by a choking sob. Her hand rushes to cover her mouth and it seems all the reality of it all suddenly slams into her. "IT SHOULDN'T BE THIS WAY!!" She screaks as she smacks the supporting hand of her family away and rushes forward, her head now resting on her dead daughters chest.
Tears rain down to coat the girls blouse as her mother begs, "Please my baby, come back to your momma! You have to, I can't live without you. Oh my precious baby PLEASE! Momma is so sorry." Her shoulders quake with the intensity of her woe.
She should have been able to protect her daughter, her precious life and soul...the reason for her living...shouldn't she have. Been at her daugthers side every step of the way, to fend off anything or anyone that made to harm her. But, how could she protect her from the people she thought she could trust.
Everything turned, everything went bitter when her daughter finally told the world who she truely is...who she truely loved.
Her parents accepted her truth instantly, they loved their daughter and knew that if she was happy they would be to cause it didn't matter that the person their daughter loved was of the same sex.
Ino's head roars back as her clenched fists slam against the casket before her knees collaspe beneath her and she falls to the floor like a limp ragdoll. Her arms lifeless at her side, fingers pressed to the carpet, as her head hangs. Chest continuing to heave as she sobs silently to herself.
A gentle hand rests on her shoulder, she doesn't even bother to shrug it off because it feels as if her body is just as dead as her daughter. "My love." the voice is from her long time husband, Sasuke. She never the man cry until the day they had to identify their daughter as she lay broken and dead on a cold metal slab, that was the moment Sasuke Uchiha's heart broke.
It seemed as if it took all the strength in the world as Ino slowly turned her shaking head up to face her husband, tears stained her beautiful face, her eyes seemed to scream at him all the turmoil that churned inside her but she was too weak to continue screaming.
A hiccup caught in his chest as another tear streamed down his porcelian skin. In an instant he was on his knees beside his wife, he pulled her into his chest with his nails digging into her back to pull her as close as he could he joined her and let their heartwenching sobs echo through the hollow church.
Sasuke had never cried before, he didn't know the feeling of tears cascading down ones cheek felt so....to him it seemed as if his tears were parts of his soul...parts of his life forces and he couldn't wait to drain himself of it. Maybe if he cried himself to death he would be with his precious daughter again, to hold her in his arms, to smile at her as she told him of her day, to sit next to her as they watched TV together.
The couple clutched each other tightly until no one could bare the picture before them, they all had their head bowed as they cried silently for the loose of such a bright young woman.
Naruto made his way up to the front, his heart teary in his chest as he watched his lifetime friends die before him. He knew there was no way back from this, that from now on he wouldn't have his old friends back ever again. "Sasuke." he whispered softly, "Ino." that name sounded more strained then the first, he could barely take it. The blond wanted to be able to do anything he could to make the couple full whole again, but there was nothing he could do and it was breaking him.
"Leave us alone." the Uchiha hissed, his face turned slowly from his wifes shoulder to glare up at the other.
Naruto's heart slammed to a halt in his chest. All his life he had never seen the man cry, he always wondered what it would look like...always wondered if it was possible. Sometimes in his life he even looked forward to a chance to be able to see the Uchiha cry just so he could know what it looked like or if it was even possible. Now with all his heart Naruto wished he could burn the image out of his memory.
Nothing....nothing in the world could ever break a person's heart in an instant like seeing an Uchiha crying...other then the loose of a loved one yourself. Naruto didn't know what he would do if he ever lost one of his own sons.
"Please, Sasuke...Ino...let me get you out of here so you can be someplace together alone." He made sure to word his sentence carefully.
Sasuke's body stiffened. Slowly he brought his wife up to her feet, her eyes stayed down cast toward her daughter's face, her body too drained to wail out her pain any longer...the only thing she could do was cry...tear after tear flooded down her cheek. "The last time we left my daughter alone with people we thought we could trust, with people who we thought would love her no matter what...she ended up dead. Don't think that for even a second we will leave our daughter's side."
The blond hid his face in shame as he remembered how his niece met her end.
"Grandpa?" the young woman asked softly. Her parents, Sasuke and Ino, had told her not to come to her grandparents home alone to tell them what she had just told her parents the other day, that she is a lesbian. But being hopeful and with a good sense of trust that everything would work out fine like it had with her parents made the girl come over on her own.
Her bright smile started to slowly fade to a look of concern as her grandfather's fingers clutched the armrest tightly, his face twisting to stern expression. "Aiko." he almost hissed as his glaring eyes turned up to lock with hers.
The girls heart started pounding in her chest, she swept her flowing black locks behind her shoulder as her bright blue eyes searched her grandfathers face, occasionally glimpsing over at her silent grandmother who had a far off expression etched onto her aged face.
"Aiko.....how could you?" Aiko recoiled slightly as a look of uncertainty crossed her face. She took a small step forward while gesturing with her hands before her.
"What do you mean papa?" Her eyes started to glow with anger as she started to realize that her grandparents weren't as accepting as her parents. "Grandpa! This is just who I am! I'm tired of living a lie and I wanted everyone to know!"
The man shot up from his chair, his knuckles popped loudly at his sides as his fists clenched tighter. He took a menacing step forward, eyes screaming his rage. "How could you do this to our family Aiko! Who do you think you are? WHO DOES YOUR FATHER THINK HE IS?! How could he take this so lightly...that bastard, I should have known he would do this to my grandchildren, I shouldn't have trusted him with your care."
His arm snapped back as confusion pulsed through Aiko's body, "What do you mea-" before she could finish his sentence her grandfather's hand came forward and snapped across her cheek. She tumbled back, but didn't fall as she backed into a wall. Her finger's sprawled over the smooth surface of the paint to support herself. Slowly her head turned up, anger and shock swirling in her vibrate blue eyes.
She couldn't get any words out before he was on her again, fist slamming against her delicate body.
The only thing that could be heard for the next five minutes was the sounds of a young woman's life fading away as someone she thought loved her no matter what beat the life out of her, shouting his disgust, while her grandmother sat silently in her chair just staring blankly at the fire crackling before her as a single tear traced down her cheek.
Sasuke and Ino sat on freshly placed patches of grass as they looked down at a cold cement slab that their daughter laid under. Everyone had long since left, and night had fallen around them...darkness hugging their skin as the moon tried its best to hide behind thick clouds.
Not even the stars were shining as brightly as they normally did...or maybe they were but the couple couldn't tell anymore. Their eyes burned, unable to focus or see anything but the headstone before them. Nothing mattered anymore, not even their own lifes./
--We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time--
OK OK, don't freak out peoples. Some people might be wondering why would did I use the grandparents as the heartless murderers? Cause~ IT HAPPENS! I don't pull stuff out of my ass...usually. Though most of the time the relatives don't actually kill the people.
I just figured Sasuke's dad would be the kind of person that would just snap like that, being a conservative christian or something. If you don't like that it was the grandfather, I don't care~ You should have written this oneshot yourself then.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.