first off, I'm reviewing the person at the top of the most prevelent reviewers catagory. I like this story and hope to see more of it in the future. oh, btw, naomi is totaly thumbs up!

Author's Response: The fact that I'm at the top of the most proficient reviewers list must mean I have no life T_T Anyway, I'm glad you like this story! Thanks for deciding to read and review, new readers are always fun :D Haha, I'm also glad you like Naomi, she's definitely a sweetheart to write about. Thanks a bunch for dropping in!

Just started to read this, and I say it is very interesting. I like how you're reviving clans of the old into a future generation.

Good from what I've seen so far.

Author's Response: Oh my gosh, I'm flattered you decided to read this! :D Well, I just take the characters I'm given and write them as how I think they'd fit into society. I'm glad you like this story so far! I hope you continue to enjoy. Thanks for reading and reviewing, Hazard-san, I appreciate it!

I read this before, around the time you posted it, but I didn't have time to review. I just read it again, for kicks, and you fixed a lot of the mistakes I had seen.... So much for that long list of editing errors I was going to give you XP

This was a very realistic chapter though. The fated introductions to one another was very well done, nothing too outlandish or crazy or anything, which I commend you on. For both groups, actually. The big get-togethers went very well for both sides.

Though why Megumi would mention chakra is beyond me. I'm very curious as to what her little mischievous mind is up to.

Naomi is a doll, I love her. Her character was so great in this, as was all of Kazuki's team. It was a very entertaining scene to read.

This was an overall incredible chapter. Great job, Silverwolf-san!

Author's Response: Cool! My proofreading skills are improving, it seems! Now if only I could do that before actually posting the chapter... Yay, I'm glad you thought the introductions went well for both sides! I was so hesitant about posting this chapter because I thought I did horribly for both scenes. I'm glad you like it though! Megumi's scheme for telling the others about chakra does seem counterproductive, but it shall be explained in upcoming chapters ;) Naomi seems to be a big hit in this chapter. I like writing her too, so I'm glad others like reading about her :D Thanks for the awesome review, Rainbow-chan! I love hearing from you!

Haha. Of course it would be Riku to step forward and go ahead and introduce himself. And then Kohana being the nice one to try and comfort Takara. As for Karasu...... Well, she's creepy. I loved how Shin had to cough to get her to speak. I absolutely loved this and everyone in it. I was somewhat surprised at how blunt Megumi was with telling them about chakra. I guess I was expecting her to see what they'd do, and then she does that. Now I really want to know their reaction.

Kazuki...... *facepalm* I'm sorry, but there's nothing more I can say. I mean, he's a great character, but still. I think he'd be easy to trick. Just tell him he's handsome and he likes you. I thought Naomi was cute in a strange way, and I loved how Yoru stepped forward to talk to her. I don't know why, but I did. I thought it was funny how Rin reacted to Kioshi. As for Umiko, I laughed how she just found all of it funny.

This chapter overall was amazing. You're writing is as amazing as always, but I did see a few mistakes. It was mostly added words, but I can't remember where I saw them. It seems as if I'm trying to make you look =P. But it was amazing and it has me hooked. I'll be sad yet happy when you start updating PotM because I really want to see what happens with both your wonderful stories. Dang it. You're just too good at making awesome stories, unlike me (and do no argue because you'll be talking to a brick wall).

Author's Response: Well, Riku just seems to be that kinda guy to be brave enough to introduce himself first. It just seems like who he is. Actually, when I was writing the part with Kohana being kind to Takara, I could envision you being like that. I don't know why, when are you ever that sympathetic? ;) Nah, seriously, I wrote her like that for you, because I knew she would be like that. Haha, Karasu is always creepy, did you really expect any less from her? Shin and Karasu make such an interesting pair though; they're such opposites that everything they do is just funny. Oh yeah, that was my twist for this not-as-great chapter. Megumi telling everyone about chakra seems counterproductive, but I am going to be showing some interesting sides to her character.

I know what you mean. Kazuki will take any compliment, even from a science experiment. I like writing about Naomi, probably because her character is just so complex, I guess. Complex in a simple way, if that makes sense.... It actually doesn't, never mind :P Yoru is the only one on that team who I imagined could tolerate Naomi's strangeness though, so it makes him a very sweet person. Hehe, Rin would have a crush on Kioshi; the both of them do enjoy science and all ;D Umiko... she's just mean to laugh at everyone XP

Added words, huh? I think that's a new one for me. I guess I'll have to read through and edit. Which I always despise doing because then I just end up hating the whole chapter. I'm excited to be updating PotM because I've been waiting to finish it up for so long. Now I can finally complete it, though it will probably still take a while. I'm glad you still enjoyed this chapter, even though I didn't really like it. Thanks for such a nice review, Sasaui! I always love hearing your feedback. Thanks a bunch for reading and reviewing!.... And your stories are better than mine ;D

Yay!! You updated again! I'm looking forward to seeing where you're going with this. Keep up the good work!

Author's Response: I know, I was excited too when I finally updated! Thank you so much for sticking with me thus far, Mindy-chan! I always appreciate such dedicated fans. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

I"m going to be spoilered, aren't I? *sighs* off to read PotM or Troal, even though I have no idea what those stand for. I think Potm is Pirates of the Mist? Anyways, Rose OUT! XD

Author's Response: Oh yeah, this would contain some spoilers... I'm sorry, Rose-chan :( Haha, TRoaL stands for The Reincarnation of a Legend and PotM is Pirates of the Mist. Again, sorry you can't read this. Perhaps in the future if you're still interested :)

First off I am going to say something to Glomp-chan: YOU ARE AWESOME. The Saviors idea is just plain amazing. You put one amazing brain (yours) and another (silverwolf's) and you get one amazing outcome.

As for your story, silverwolf, I will admit that I saw that part where you were a little worse in writing, but I cannot say anything bad about it since I do it as well. I mean, seriously, look at the introduction of Sorano and Rikuto to that of Amanda. My writing was WAY down I think. But since she already told you where, I'm not going to do it because I'm lazy that way. =P

Okay, now to the positive stuff.......

THAT IS IT! YOU HAVE DONE IT! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'VE DONE IT!

Dun dun dun.......

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!! You officially have another story on the YOUR STORY list that I have created but continue to forget to add to my account profile. So basically I'm telling you that this story has achieved YOUR STORY status (even though I'm not really sure why getting my ultimate compliment is such a great thing to receive. Now if it was someone like BattyBigSister or all the other amazing authors here, I'd understand).

Okay, now to reviewing the sections (because all of them are so great they each deserve their own comments). I really liked the beginning. It was just Madara talking to Zetsu, but then you added that Saviors thing and it left the reader wondering what they were. That was just plain amazing and had me wanting to skip ahead just to find out.

And I agree BigSis, Kazuki and Rin do make an interesting couple. And by that, I mean two people, not what is probably going to happen in the future. I just love the way they act, with Rin's bloodthirsty and cold nature contrasting with his mostly relaxed and bright self (at least that's how I think he acts). And then you have Umiko just suddenly attack him. Is it just me or do these females hate Kazuki? Poor guy =(. It's pretty bad that I feel pity for the evil dude......

I sure do like Amaya's spunk. She just seems so..... I can't find the right word right now, but she's so whateverthewordI'mlookingforis. I guess she just seems to have a strong spark of life in her. And as many others have stated, the sugar thing has me curious. I know that fleamicheal said something about it being an uh-oh, and I can't wait to see what you have planned for that. Knowing you, it ought to be good.

If I said I loved that strange Rin and Kazuki thing, then I totally love the Shin and Karasu. I was totally captured when I read the guard scene. I think the way he held her back and everything. I don't know what it was, but I still have that stuck in my head.

And I shall tell you now - you did perfect with Riku. If anyone I knew reviewed more (including Krina, Sky-chan, and Starless__Night), you'd be told the same about all their characters. Everything about that scene was realistic. From Riku's worry to Kohana's need to not let on she was hurt so she wouldn't hurt her friend. Then again, I did create her, so I'll probably think most things that you do with her will be realistic. I think it's funny how everyone seems to be hungry through this, by the way. At first I thought they'd all meet at the ramen shop =P. Riku and Kohana's friendship and everything about Kohana was dead on. Great job, Silverwolf.

Reading Yuna and Kaoru was really fun. It goes from the friendship that is full of worry because of Kohana being attacked to a friendship that is happy and goofing off. I really liked that, even if you didn't intentionally do it (which you might have). The part where Kaoru having her hair eaten was comical and I'm glad Yuna was able to assure her about staying with her family.

No offense to either Lilmissmindy or you if you didn't mean to write her this way, but Megumi seems like a brat. I'm sorry, but she does. Just the money thing made her seem spoiled and like that money gave her height in the food chain of the world. It just may be the way my mind works, I dunno. She was wonderful, though, and so was Takara and Ginmaru. I keep on wondering if maybe they'll grow bonded like all the other pairs have and then she'll help her turn from the darkness. I always want to see the bad guys come into the light because, well, it's just me. I think everyone should have a one way ticket to the light side, but the stupid Darth Vader thing seems to make people think they have to go to the dark side to be cool (my lame attempt at a joke, but I had to make a mention of Darth Vader and the dark side because my family brought it when I was watching them play Monopoly).

And I'm so loving Yoru. Just that way he seems to not care about anything is so hilarious. I'm sorry, Shadow-san, but it's hilarious reading all these characters getting under your character's skin. I really wonder how he'll fight since he's always calm so he'd be hard to provoke or scare...... Well, I can't wait to see more of him. I just feel so attached to him for some reason.....

-_-'....... WE'VE BEEN TALKING TOO MUCH!!! I mean, seriously, have our minds blended together? Just the whole Karasu thing seems like what I had planned. Well, it wouldn't be exactly like yours, but still, they met because her. Either way, the meeting was just plain amazing. I can't wait to see what will happen next. And BigSis has a point about the wondering off part, but you've already told here you had something planned for that, so I'll just have to wait and see. The meeting was hilarious, though. Well, Riku's rage was hilarious. The whole Yuu stopping her was pretty cool, though. And I liked the calm nature that Yuna had. =D All the animals are really protective. I was afraid we'd see a cat/deer/snake fight. And then Ginmaru jumped in and it seemed to slowly defuse.... Ah, Megumi, just what she needed, huh? Now she won't have to spend all her daddy's money *insert eye roll* to find them.

Here is proof that for any of my ocs, I try to imagine the worst things happening. The moment I heard about the Saviors, I wondered what would happen if Kohana was captured by them. Yeah yeah, I know, I'm evil and you probably pity every oc that has to put up with me. And just think, most of my ocs are still kids and I've already tortured them.

And Kioshi should be hit! Yeah yeah, he's doing it for the greater good blah blah blah! But how dare he treat BigSis's oc the way he does! Making her what she is. Then again, it's just a fanfic, but still. He needs whacked the same way that I thought Hidan needed to have his head banged off the wall a dozen times. He's a great oc and everything, but I still want to whack him.

As for Naomi, she's just plain amazing. My pity goes out to her, though. I can't believe that after everything Kioshi's done, he threw her into that filthy cell! I mean, seriously, experimenting on her until she is like she is! Unbelievable. I'm glad she at least has her friend Hamtaro, though. The way she went from talking from third person with humans to first person with Hamtaro was interesting. I kinda don't want any of the ocs to hurt her. She just seems to fragile and misguided. I hate when the dark hearted manipulate people who don't know better.

Overall this chapter was plain amazing. I loved every second of it and it keeps me wanting to know what's going to happen next. I hope this super long review makes up for the time I didn't review. But I just couldn't write a short one. This one deserved a longer review than this, but I don't want to make you fall asleep by rambling. I really wish there was a YOUR STORY button under that option list, but, sadly, that's only in the option box in my mind. Speaking of which, I think I need to do something. Give me a second......



If it doesn't show, here's the link: http://i.imgur.com/8oPJx.gif

The heart symbolizes that the story is so great it will remain in my heart. Yeah, sappy, I know, but it's true. Great job, Silverwolf. There's is nothing more I can say except this is definitely more than worthy than YOUR STORY.

Author's Response: Ah, you saw my decrease in writing. Well, I'm glad about that. That means you guys are paying attention and actually want to point it out to me, so thank you. Oh my gosh! I have achieved the YOUR STORY compliment for another story?! I feel so accomplished! Thank you very much!

Eh, I wasn't a fan of the beginning, mostly probably due to Zetsu; I just can't seem to wrap my mind around our cannibal friend. But yeah, the Saviors intro was meant as a semi-cliffhanger that was resolved at the very end of the chapter. Hehe, I'm so evil :P

Oh, I've thought of different outcomes for Kazuki and Rin, though I honestly don't know where the story will lead to in that aspect. But yeah, they do make quite the pair. As for girls being mean to Kazuki, Umiko just wanted to fight, that's all.

Ah, you like Amaya's spunk? Then I guess the word you're looking for is... uh, spunky, I guess? Really, 2-5 lines of the sugar reference has captured everyone's interest. Haha, yes, I do have an idea for that particular part of the story :D

Once again, everyone likes Shin and Karasu. I don't know what part you liked, but I'm glad you liked it at all XD

Oh, thank you for telling me I did a good job on the characters for your friends. The Riku and Kohana scene was one of the first scene I wrote, because it was sweet and realistic (as you said).

Um... I actually didn't plan the transition that way. I just went in order of when I introduced the characters before. But I'm glad you liked that anyway. Yuna and Kaoru are a really sweet pair to write about because I think their personalities just go so well together.

Oh, well, lilmissmindy had told me to write Megumi as disobedient, sarcastic, and loud. I suppose I didn't mean to make her come off as a brat. But lilmissmindy seemed to like her, so as long as I continue to write the characters as the creators wish, then I'm alright with that. Huh, BattyBigSis said the same thing about Takara and Megumi bonding. You guys just might be too smart for me ;) Ah, you'll just have to wait and see about them.

I love Yoru too! His calm personality is so annoying, and I love that! I'm glad you did too!

Haha, I guess we really have talked too much. I'm sorry that this seemed like something that you imagined for your own story. But I'm glad you liked the scene anyway! All the characters' personalities meshed together, and I'm glad to hear they blended well. I did think about the animals fighting, but that would have been counterproductive, as the heroes shouldn't really fight... yet ;)

Ah, the Saviors... yeah, I won't spoil anything ;D Though it's funny that you hate Kioshi so much; BattyBigSis herself said that she loved him. But I do also love Naomi, so I see where you're coming from.

Wow, thank you very much for the long review. When I said I liked long reviews because they help me to fix my mistakes, I didn't expect so much praise. And a beautiful banner to top it all off! Wow! Pfft, sappiness, I love sappiness, don't worry ;D Oh gosh, thank you very much for your wonderful review. It really made my day. You're amazing, Sasaui! Thank you!

So cool! It's so exciting that everyone finally met each other! All the characters were really awesome, you did a great job with them! Good work! I can't wait to see what happens now that the heroes are together and the bad guys are gathering up. Keep up the awesome work!

Author's Response: I know, I'm really happy that everyone finally ran into one another. I'm glad you think I did so well with the characters. The heroes and bad guys have gathered into their respective groups, so things will definitely be getting more interesting ;) Thanks for the encouragement! I really appreciate it!

Yes, I admit it! When you said you'd included every character in this chapter, I skimmed through the entire thing just to find out where (or, more accurately, who) I was. I'm right there at the end, as the plot twist. Wow! =0D She's awesome, so don't worry about my opinion and just do what you like with her. I knew you'd do terrifically... and you did. =0D
To be honest, I did feel some of the description could have used a little more detail here and there, but it was still really good. You seemed to be getting into your writing a bit more as we went down the chapter anyway. I only mentioned it, because well I feel i have to. If I don't mention it when I don't like something, it makes my praise less meaningful too.
Madara was having an odd day. He's practically being a gentleman towards the end there - which is technically in character I suppose - although I'm surprised. It's not as if he needed to be so nice to Naomi. She was hardly going to refuse... maybe she amused him. Who knows. It love that whole scene though. I was basically just being bought and sold as a kind of pet... and only the 'cannibal/man-eating plant' felt a shred of sympathy for me... or possibly just concern about the quality of the product. 'Daddy dearest' (as I will probably refer to him in every review from now on) was amazing. So self-righteously evil without realising it -- perfect.
Umiko sounds like an interesting little lady and Rin and Kazuki make quite an interesting pair - which makes for an interesting team I suppose. If I'm totally honest those first two scenes did feel as if they could have used a little more love and attention from their Mummy and were a tad harder to get into, which was surprising given that your standard is usually quite high these days... but everyone has off-days... and I'm guessing that the writing of those scenes coincided with other things in your life that understandably took more of your attention. Then again, it could just be that I'm so over-excited about the Naomi scene that I struggle to concentrate on everything else.
By comparison, by the time we get to Yoru's scene you've put in all your usual detail and eloquence and it was paying back its dividends. The waterfall was lovely and just as beautiful as in the OVA - and the dialogue was hilarious. What a guy! I think he's my favourite so far.
The Amaya and Yuu scene felt better done than the first two to me as well. Much more detail here and the thing about the cola was an interesting little ploy. I look forward to seeing him on sugar. ;0) They interacted really well - you could almost see them hitting it off.
Karasu and Shin were equally well matched and fun to read about, as usual. The poor boy really drew the short straw with her, huh? It's hard to say who manipulates who when they interact anymore - but they've certainly got each other's measure.
It's also good to see that Naruto's descendants are keeping Konoha's Ramen stores in business, but only ten bowls? I'm surprised. I'm sure Naruto's could have managed more. The Hyuuga genes must be keeping the ramen-eating down to more sane levels...
No, Riku and Kohana are really lovely and that particular extract was so vivid and detailed and in parts funny. Well, both of theirs were.
Yuna and Kaoru have a lovely interaction as well. I like how you describe them with the stag. With Yuna around their scenes take on a lovely peaceful feel as well.
And of course your scene. You know reading that - and her interaction with Megumi - I was strangely reminded of Demon Fox. It's kind of weird how they took to one another, in a nice way.... Excuse me, Cleopatra has just taken over the rear half of me for a cuddle. She does that. It's distracting. Oh, she gone again. Where was I? Oh right, yes, as I was saying, I wouldn't be surprised if they ended up with a 'sisterly' relationship (after many long trails of course)... Oh and the way she referred to her father's 'money' was precious... and hilarious. "Yes, Daddy's made this funding available to me so I can tack you down, spy on you and probably kill you, so don't hesitate about having a meal from it when it's offered." Brilliant as a twist. I do hope Takara gets some food though. She seems to need it.
And then we have it, 'Return-of-the-Ninja: the Big Meet and Greet'. You know, Megumi's getting all excited, but their meeting was so casual I almost wouldn't be surprised if half of them just wondered off again. I'm really impressed that you could get all ten characters together in such circumstances. I really can't wait to see what your plans for them are from here on out. I mean, how do you keep them together now they've met for a start? Exciting!

Author's Response: Oh my gosh, thank you so much for your honesty in the beginning. I knew that the description was lacking in certain scenes (why I posted it anyway, I don't know), and you're the first to point it out. I appreciate the fact that you pointed out where exactly the description was not as good, because I actually couldn't find which parts I was least happy with. Thank you very much for that. The first two scenes were probably not as good because I honestly didn't know how on earth I was going to bring everyone together. I had already set that goal for myself, and I was not going to go back on it. No, it wasn't your eagerness to get to Naomi; it really was that my writing was lacking in that higher quality that I wanted.

Hmm, I didn't notice that with Madara. He does seem in character, though I guess you're right in him being a bit too polite. I didn't mean for it to come across the way; it was more of the amusement thing, only slightly though. Yes, ironically enough, the cannibal was worried about your character's health. Zetsu's black half is actually the more logical part of his body, and it seemed appropriate that he would wonder why the Saviors' best experiment looked so horribly taken care of. Or at least that's how I envisioned it... Haha, I'm glad you especially like Kioshi. Let's hope I continue to do well with him, as his beliefs might honestly be a bit difficult for me to include, as I'm not used the 'mad scientist' in my stories.

I'll agree that the scenes got better as we went along, since I got more into it as I continued to write. Yoru's scene, admittedly, definitely received more detail than Umiko's introduction. But at least the waterfall and everything came out so well :D

Haha, everyone is so excited to see Yuu on sugar. He and Amaya are steadily growing closer, I'm glad that's showing. Same with Karasu and Shin, actually. Those two just make such a fun pair to write about. *sigh* Sadly, the strict genes of the Hyuuga clan completely threw off Naruto's ramen-eating abilities as they passed down the generations. Riku and Kohana, since they are so close, make me smile, since they're so close and adorable :) Yuna and Kaoru are also a nice mellow yet fun pair to describe, since their personalities just blend so well together, I think.

...Really? You thought of Demon Fox? Eh, well yeah, now that I think of it, Megumi is like her in some ways. And with their sudden 'friendship', well, Megumi is just that good when it comes to making friends ;) Aha, I'm glad you noticed the 'Daddy's money' reference. I liked that bit myself; one of my attempts at comedy, I'm glad you liked it.

Ah, yup, the Big Meet and Greet is an excellent way to put it. It feels rather good to finally bring everyone together. I understand what you mean about everyone possibly wandering off again, but don't worry about that... I have my ideas ;) We all must wait and see what plans I concoct for our heroes. Indeed, it is exciting! Thank you very much for reading and reviewing. I really appreciated your constructive criticism and positive feedback. Thank you very, very much. Your review really helped me think about this chapter. I always appreciate your words, they're very helpful. Thanks again for reading and reviewing, you're wonderful, BattyBigSis!

Awesomeness. The one thing I can say to review this.

You did a wonderful job on describing Karasu and her temper. I can not wait to see where you take this. It is not my place to judge other people's characters, but I loved Shin in this. keep up the fantastic work. =D

Author's Response: XD Yay! I'm so happy you thought it was awesome! I was honestly very worried about Karasu's personality. I know that she's cold and sadistic, but I thought her temper would be unlikeable to you. But I'm glad you thought it was so good anyway! I also cannot wait to see where I take this ;D Haha, I'm glad you liked Shin as well. He makes an interesting companion to Karasu, I think. Thanks for the awesome review, Fantasy Madeline! I really appreciate your amazingly kind words! Thanks again for reading and reviewing, you're incredible!

OMG! OMG! OMG!!!
UNBELIEVABLY AWESOME....!!!
YAY!! :D
my most favourite story (n my first TONFA story...) has set sail once again... :D
Hurray...!
i've waited like for ages... n as i always say... it ws soooo worth the wait......!!! :Dahaa... all of the characters finally together...
Oooh Kazuki ws perfect once again... n lol at his flirty nature...xD
wow... all the others were super too...
n awesome hw u brought them together :O
u've gt immense talent...!!!
*nervous laugh* naomi is gonna join us...?? *gulp* hurray... -_-'
all in all a splendid chapter... can't wait for the next one...
sorry 4 such a small review... coz this chapter does deserve a bigger one... but m in a hurry , but i just couldn't leave without reviewing :P
KEEP UP THE GOOD JOB URUFU-CHAN..!!!

Author's Response: Wow. I know that this is your first TONFA story, but it's also your favorite? Wow, thanks so much! Haha, yeah I know. It has finally started moving again, thank goodness. I'm glad this was worth the wait, as I was worried this would be a letdown :P Yup, I'm also glad I finally brought everyone together, it's such a relief. I'm glad I got Kazuki right once again, it's always nice to know that I'm writing the characters the way the owners want them. Haha, yes, Naomi is joining your group XD Thanks so much for the nice review. I really appreciate the positive feedback! Thanks again!

Aw, there's no next button... :(

Wow, all these characters in one chapter, it was amazing. Your skill at writing is really noticeable, as you're writing the characters as if they are your own. They stick so well to the owners' descriptions, and you write it so well, almost effortlessly, it looks like.

This a great story, with an intersting developing plot and great characters that you write so well. Good job, I can't wait for more!

Author's Response: I know, I'm sorry! I'll try to update this soon, but I'm working on a total of five stories, so the updates are scattered all over the place. But oh man, thank you for your compliments on my writing. It's very encouraging. I'm so glad you have found interest in this. I hope it continues to keep your attention. Thank you so much for reading my story and thanks even more for reviewing! You're awesome!