From Here to There
by nAnDo
One would have thought that, in the middle of this borderless forest, nothing could be found after it; that
there'd be nothing, at the end of the thick woods and the quiet streams. But there is something. A town.
The examination has ended. Konoha stands out in the middle of the forest, but it is still a little
far down the road, it is a cool breeze that brings it closer.
I hadn't noticed that my companion, now on the walk back to town, had his eyes fixed to something in
the horizon.
I break the silence.
-Are you tired from the examination?
-It always ti...
-Figures.
Shikamaru turned to face me with those lazy eyes of his.
So we have been given this time. Walking in konoha roads, smelling the scent of this village in the air,
hearing the sound of my own heartbeat, this fleeting feeling...
I look to the sky. Clouds. The only thing to fear is the wind.
Wind.
-It feels like rain.
-Oh.
When talking with you its like talking to no one, about nothing, using no words. If for a moment you
could just feel how i feel about you.
-Hey, hungry?
-Yes, why? You buying?
I said with a barely perceptible smile.
-I thought you could-
-Ah, forget I asked, lets go eat.
-Women are so-
-Troublesome?
-I'll have the set.
-Yeah, me too.
-Shikamaru, you didnt even looked at the menu.
-...
-Let me guess...
-Yeah.
-.......isnt it. Always. So.
But those eyes you look me with... Why now? Why with him? I had always tried to be so careful, have
everything planned, but now and here, so opposite, so different. What is it?
-Everything alright? You seem a little down.
-Sometimes it seems as if you've not changed from those days when we first met. Or maybe I just cant see it.
-You know, you do seem different, Temari.
-How so?
-I thought you were a cold biii-
-Is that what you thought about me?
-When I first met you. Yes. But then we kept bumping with each other and each time we were together
you showed me another side of the real temari. And I'm glad you did.
-Oh...really?
His words soothed, if even for an instant, my troubled heart.
-For I can see that you are a great ally for kono-
-Heh.
-What?
-Lets pay, ah, sorry. I'll pay.
Standing outside, tasting the scent of wet air. The sun is hanging on the horizon, there, unreachable.
If i could just touch it, even for an instant, and let it know how much I need it. But the clouds the
wind brought start blocking the sunlight.
-I told you it felt like rain.
But it is not only raining, it is the whole sky that is falling. Though, not only the sky.
-Ah, no luck. I'll go to Asuma's place for a shogi match, is closer than my place. Well...
Now I feel worse than before. It was starting to feel like something else.
Our eyes find each other under this heavy rain. They are locked like in a eternal gaze, but this is
different.
It seems like this moment will last forever. But it was just an instant. And when it ended we quickly
turned trying to avoid being found out.
-On the other hand, we can wait for the rain to quell at my place... I'd hate myself if you were to get
sick.
I want to, but I dont like to be second.
-Thanks...but I'll retu-
-Thank me when the rain is over. Come on.
...!
We were walking again. And stopped in a store to buy dinner, but Shikamaru bought sake.
-I dont drink, you know. But now, I want to.
-If I am a burden, dont worry, I'll-
-Nah. Come.
You said, turning to face me with a smile on your face. And I could see, for the very first time, the sunlight
cutting through the clouds.
Now we walk once more. We've been walking on this road more than we've advanced, so it seems. I am drifting.
Between thoughts, between feelings.
There's no one on the streets. The rain seems unstoppable, still we don't hurry. There's no one here. Only
us. We don't talk the rest of the way, at least I couldn't, my heart threatened to spill over. For that stretch, even
breathing was hard.
-Come in.
Suddenly we arrived. I didn't notice. How long we walked?
-Are your parents home?
-My dad's on a mission, and my mother is out until later.
-Just one thing.
-Yes?
-Even thought I am at your place, you brought sake, and there is no one home, don't get any funny ideas.
I said as I was entering his house.
-You're as safe with me as if Kazekage were here.
Thanks. Shikamaru.
-This is my room. Come on in.
-Exactly the lazy type.
-Heh.
-The bathroom is the last door to the left. You can grab a towel there and dry yourself. And you can put your clothes
in the dryer thats over there. 5 minutes'll do.
-Ok. But no peeki...
He sat, next to the kotatsu, resting his head on the palm of his hand, elbow on table. Looking through the window.
What is it that are you thinking at a time like this?
.
.
.
Are you nervous? Because I am.
.
.
-Feeling better?
-Yes, thanks for letting me dry. You can go too, now.
-Nah, later.
-This sake's good. Want some?
-I'd love some.
It feels so natural now. We could be like this forever.
It is still raining, and I am still here...with you.
I want to say something. But Shikamaru speaks first.
-Why?
-Eh?
-Why are you here? Why still here? I don't get it. I just don't get you.
-Excuse me...?
-What game is it that you are playing? What are you trying to pull off?
Not exactly what I expected. Sometimes it's so difficult to figure you out, and then you go out and say things
like that. So serious. I can't take it anymore. This feeling is overwhelming.
-I...I...
My voice is faltering. Escaping.
The sound of rain. I never really heard it until now.
I want to go out. What day is it today? Friday? Kazekage must be on a meeting, and Kankuro, must be resting from his
latest mission. If I go now I can be there by morning. Go somewhere...somewhere where I am...
Time to standup.
-I am goi-
-Temari! Hey!
Just stormed out. Under the rain he will not see me cry. I hope the rain is so thick that he won't see me at all,
anything at all.
Is it me, or the rain is stronger now.
-Don't come near me, you...you...Just don't come.
-Ok, ok. I'll sit here but please just...
-No! I thought...I don't really know what I was thinking, but doesn't matter at all. It was wrong. I was wrong.
-Just answer me and then we go our separate ways if that is what you want.
-What?! What I am trying to pull off, what game am I playing?!
-Not that. But why...why you who are up there, sister of Kazekage. Why with me, a lazy bum?!. Couldn't even bring Sasuke back that time. And
got my friends injured. Even though I've accepted the way of the ninja sometime ago... And I know I'm not that great of a guy. But still I wonder
why are you here?
-What?
Shikamaru...you...
-You are so hard to read...and I don't know. Why me? I never thought you-
-Now you are wrong.
-eh?
-What I see everyday I am with you is you. Shikamaru. And that is what I like. And you are the one that is hard to read.
You are like a vast and imprecise map of a vanishing region. You express in a language that tends to silence. You speak
with no words. And I no longer hope to be heard. Why always you, with the same indifference. For sometime if it was me
I thought that maybe...you...
-Me what?
.
.
.
-...nothing.
.
.
.
This is it. Maybe it'll stop raining now. At the end of all things. It could've been different.
No.
-Temari, before you go I want to say thanks for saving me that time. I don't remmember if I thanked you or not. But,
thanks.
Shika...
-I'd like it if we stay friends but I don't really know. Take care, Shikamaru.
-Can I... hope to meet you again? To start over, perhaps.
-...
-I always wondered, if you wondered the same. And now that I know, I go and fuck it all up. Now that it has all become like this,
let me tell you what I thought about you.
.
.
.
-I wondered that if you were like a strong wind then I'd like to be a cloud, free, to let itself be
carried away by the wind...
.
.
-But...then the cloud would disappear.
-Yes, within that wind.
-Shikamaru...
.
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