Well it all started three months ago, on a cold and stormy night, in the kumogakure chamber of judicial affairs...
“Funshazo Kariudo, you are charged with high treason for your transgressions against the raikage, What do you say in your defense?” Said the curmudgeonly high inquisitor.
“How was I supposed to know she was his daughter, eh? she looks nothing like him!” said the roguishly handsome and quick witted Adonis of a man. (Again he's telling the story, he is clever, but a roguishly handsome Adonis would pushing it, he is a little out of shape, tall, broad shouldered, dark brown eyes has shoulder length black hair, and is wearing fedora, a dark green jacket and dark tan pants)
“Silence! It matters not that you were unaware of her lineage, you still overstepped your boundaries, and that cannot go unpunished!” said the fuming and impatient raikage.
'Ugh... this sucks, I'm still on probation from the last time I was here, they'll probably make me do f-ranked missions... do they even have f-ranked missions. Man I'm hungry, and bored when is this gonna be over... I was going to find Ichiro and go bar-hopping!' “FUNSHAZO! ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING?!” bellowed the inquisitor.
“...Of course I was, I'm not a spazoid.” said the awesome and sexy hero of kumo.
“Well then do you agree to the terms?” said the inquisitor
“Uhhh... well, sure!” I said not totally sure what was going on
“Good! Then the all of your worldly possessions will be liquidated, and you will be cast out of kumo never to return, NEXT!” said the kage.
“Wait, what! NOOOOOOOOOO!!!”
{END HUNTER POV}
“And that's how I ended up here, mina-chan.” said hunter.
The hokage grimaces and his eyes do weird stuff.
“...Don't ever call me that! And have you finished updating your bio, so I can put it with your examination results in your file?”asked the fourth hokage.
“Yeah, sure whatever here they are.” hunter handed the folder to the hokage.
The fourth excused hunter for the day as he has no use for him at the moment, and reviews the file.
Name: Funshazo Kariudo
Aliases: Hunter, Jet, the third son of raiden, the demon of lightning
Bloodline: megumi no denkou; ability to convert energy into chakra and chakra into electricity, natural lightning affinity, rapid regeneration, and CLASSIFIED ABILITY
Rank: tokubetsu-jounin
Age:???
I.Q.: 131
Specialties: interrogation, assassination, poison, and improvised weaponry
Chakra Affinity: lightning
Fighting Style: defensive, he slowly wears his opponent down with mind games, and may or may not poison them, when he needs to end the fight quickly he uses a weapon.
Taijutsu: 3
Ninjutsu: 10
Genjutsu: -6
Armed Combat: 8
Stealth: 2
Interrogation: 10
Infiltration: 3
Assassination: 9
Medic: 4
Mission Success Rate: 87 percent
Bounty: 200,000
Notes: banished from kumo, the raikage's report suggests that he made a pass at his daughter, and that he is an eccentric, womanizing, alcoholic.
“How can someone get a -6, maybe it's a typo?” said the bemused kage.
Minato looked out his window and sighed... he hated how they made him look annoyed and constipated on the hokage monument.
'I don't actually look like that... do I?'
END
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Table of Contents
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Story notes: M first story... that doesn't suck.
Chapter notes: Naruto: darker, and edgier, now 32 percent more ninja-y!
Chapter one, a stake to the heart: as told by Hunter, so don't expect objectivity.
Chapter end notes: Disclaimer: I do not own naruto, and it's not unreasonable to say that I shall never own it, and I wont make any profit from this so there is no reason to sue me. (this applies to all chapters)
Author notes: this is my vision of how naruto should be, so if you say that a character is ooc, or that i'm not following canon, I will laugh at you... no really it would absolutely make my day. This chapter takes place 15 years before the beginning of naruto, and it just introduces an oc, and starts the story. Ignore the chapter names as they have little to no relevance to the plot, they just sound cool.