One: Konoha’s High. . .
“New kid in my class.” Kiba said, unpacking his lunch, “Emo.”
“Emo or Wemo?” Naruto asked.
“Nah, looks like a cutter. He’s real.”
“He’s got a couple of older siblings in the senior class, too.” Sasuke said. “Itachi told me at snack.”
“He’s already met them?” the blonde asked.
“They’re all coming over to the backlot after school.”
“WHAT?!?!?!?!” they all shouted.
“That’s not a place for newbies!!” Kiba said.
“Well, maybe for the cutter. . .”
“That doesn’t mean anything.” Shikamaru said, chewing on a long piece of grass. “Being a cutter doesn’t mean he’s a druggie.”
“Yeah, but apparently that Emo-kid’s older brother’s a light druggie.” Sasuke said. “You all going to come?”
“Of course!!” Naruto said, grinning. “Backlot Friday is the best day of the week!”
“Oo! Here comes the Cutter-Kid!” Kiba said, smirking. “Should we give him a hard time?”
“Nah, let’s not make him kill himself.” Naruto said. “Hey! New kid!!” Gaara turned toward the group of students who were his age, kind of glaring at the blonde boy.
“My name’s not New Kid.”
“So, what’s your name?”
“Gaara.” the redhead said.
“My name’s Naruto! Wanna come sit with us?”
“Well, you don’t know the ways of the cafeteria, and you might wanna be careful. We’ll help!” he said, grinning. Gaara looked skeptical, but then looked at the crowd. They all seemed to have their own little cliques, and Gaara did not want to stay with his siblings. . .
“Okay.” Gaara said, putting his tray down next to Neji, who had a hyper girl all over him.
“So, where are you from?” Naruto asked.
“No,” Gaara said. “Expelled.”
“Cutting during class.”
“Sheesh! I cut all the time and they haven’t expelled me!!”
“Not as in truant, Naruto.” the redhead clarified. “As in with a rather sharp razor.” Gaara pulled back his long sleeves to show his scabs and scars proudly. The boy smiled, though everyone else was a little bothered by it.
“Uh, I see.” Neji said. “Do you cut often?”
“No, just Fridays. . . best day of the week.”
“Why Friday?” Shika asked.
“Gives the cuts two days to heal, three if I’m lucky.” Tenten, who was clinging to Neji, scooted away from Gaara and sat with Hinata.
“So! I heard you and your siblings were going to go to the backlot!!” Naruto interjected. “You ready?”
“I don’t even know what that is.” Gaara admitted.
“It’s an old parking complex.” Sasuke said. “It’s on the south side of campus, and there’s never anyone there. On Fridays we go and smoke.”
“Whatever we can get during the week.” Shika said. “The lot used to be a weed farm, but we’ve smoked all that away since we started freshman year. Naruto and Sasuke always get the best stuff, so if you don’t have anything, I’m sure they’ll give you something.”
“What do you have?”
“I’m snorting today.” Naruto said. “I got coke.”
“My brother’s bringing Sasori’s weed.”
“Sasori?!?” Kiba cried. “Whoa! How Itachi get hold of THAT?!?”
“Am I missing something?” Gaara asked, knowing that Sasori was the Theatre teacher.
“Sasori’s come up with a way to grow weed inside of the dark or something.”
“That’s not it.” Shika said. “He’s come up with a variety of weed that grows with less light. That’s because the plant is considerably smaller, and it doesn’t even look like marijuana.” Gaara raised a nonexistent eyebrow. “It looks like large dill. Anyway, Sasori only gets a few good smokes in a month because there isn’t a lot of it. Itachi must have paid a LOT of money for Sasori to give up his smoke.”
“I’ll lend you some if you want.” Sasuke said to Gaara.
“I’ll just bring my razor blade and sit in the corner.”
“What’s so appealing about cutting?” Yumi asked, rubbing her wrists together. “I couldn’t even stand to watch you do that!”
“Hey, welcome back.” Kiba said. “You took way too long.”
“What?” she said, scowling. “Sakura was wide open and I had to nail her!!” Gaara kind of choked on his sandwich.
“Not like that, Emo-boy.” Shika explained. “Sakura and Yumi hate each other’s guts. What did you do to her this time?”
“You know how the cookies had raisins in them today? Well, I took out all those nasty raisins and pelted her with them.”
“You just threw them at her?” Neji asked.
“No, I had a sling shot!” Yumi said, producing the well used tool. “The little slut didn’t even see what hit her.”
“Where’s Ryuu?” Tenten asked.
“Pouring the crumbs of the cookie down Sakura’s skirt. I don’t think she’ll manage to do it before lunch is out, but I wished her good luck.”
“EAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Everyone on campus turned toward the shriek, which came from a very disgusted pink haired girl running to the bathroom. Not a minute afterward, Ryuu snuck back to the table where everyone else was.
“Congrats.” Yumi said, still laughing. Ryuu smiled.
“Told you I could do it.” the dragon girl said. Yumi nodded and pulled out five dollars.
“For that sight, I gladly pay you my alcohol money.”
“Cool, ‘cause I needed to buy cigarettes after school.” Ryuu said, tucking the money inside her coat pocket. Gaara was thoroughly confused. “So! Who’s the Emu?”
“Emu??” Gaara asked.
“It’s a flightless bird that runs in Australia.” Ryuu said. “Kinda like an ostrich.” Gaara’s eyebrow twitched.
“My name’s Gaara. You’re Ryuu?”
“Yes, as in the masochistic P.E. teacher.” she said, taking out a toothpick and chewing on it. “Damnit, I wish I hadn’t smoked my last cig this morning.”
“Hey, at least you’re getting your guilty pleasure after school.” Tenten said. “My mom took away my pills!”
“You’d better hope that you bleed in the next few days.” Naruto laughed out. Neji sighed.
“You can laugh because you’re not going to be a father.”
“Yeah, but I’ve been there.” Naruto said, smirking. “You gonna keep it if she’s pregnant?”
“Of course not!!”
“Then there’s nothing to worry about! Abortions are outpatients, aren’t they?” Kiba said.
“Pretty much.” Hinata said, saying something for the first time. “I’ve done it twice, and I’ve been out that evening.”
“Are you ALL insane??” Gaara asked, not believing his ears. They all turned to him, then to each other, and then back at him.
“Yes!!” they all said in unison. Gaara smiled, happy to finally see some people who were just as insane and screwed up as him.
“Oh, and guys? I can’t go after school.” Tenten said. “I’ve got to mow the lawn and do a whole bunch of other chores because my mom found out I was having sex.”
“You mow your lawn?” Gaara asked. They all looked at him like he was crazy. “Erm, is that so common?”
“Uh, yeah?” Shikamaru said. “What do you do with yours?”
“Well, it never grows. . .” the redhead admitted. “It kinda shrinks a lot, actually.”
“I don’t know! It cuts itself!!” he said. Ryuu and Yumi looked at each other and bust out laughing.
“GAARA’S LAWN IS EMO!!!!!!!!!!!”
“It cuts itself, thus is it emo!!” Yumi said. “Damn, I wish I had an emo lawn.”
“I could use and emo lawn right now.” Tenten said, her head on the table. “It’d be one less thing for me to do.”
A/N: Hey! Thanks for reading my Fun-fic!! I’ll be updating this one every once in a while when I just need some crack. . . Oh, and trust me, the food fight and peanut-obsessed vampires will come soon enough X3.
Please rate and review!!! ^________^
Chapter notes: Disclaimer in the summary. . . ^__^
A/N: I STARTED A NEW CRAP FIC!!!!!!!! XD
This was just for fun, and I thought that this would be a good cheese course before your dessert ^____^. Anyway, this is set in a high school, and much is to be explained later on. I don't know where this is going. I just had the compulsion to write about all the things mentioned in the summary ^^;;;
Please rate and review also!!! ^__________^