There was something not right.
He could feel it when he walked through the door. He could feel it when he took his shoes off, stepping completely into the small home that his best friend and his lover resided within. He knew that something was wrong and he didn’t like the feeling at all.
Moving quickly through the familiar hallways, the familiar path he’d taken countless times before when other feelings motivated him, he stalked through the home, intent on finding his friend. What he saw, was something he wasn’t used to.
In the small, spotless bathroom, his lover was in the tub. Water covered his naked form, and his body was resting in the water. His head was thrown back, appearing as though he was resting, but he knew that there was something wrong. He never got completely relaxed in the bath. There were too many memories associated with it and none of them were pleasant like they should have been. He could remember when he’d been told about everything, when he’d finally confessed, his eyes swimming with tears that wouldn’t be shed, tears that refused to fall. Even in his weakest moments, that man had never allowed tears to fall down his cheeks.
He walked forward, kneeling beside the man, bringing his tanned hands to the edge of the tub, hoping that he was wrong and that he was only sleeping, only relaxing after a long, long mission. He’d been gone for awhile; it was why he’d taken so long in getting over. He’d wanted to be perfect before presenting himself to his lover.
“Sasuke,” he whispered softly, his voice cracking in his throat. He knew, he knew that he wouldn’t be coming back. He knew that the man wouldn’t be answering him, not this time. “Sasuke, please?”
There was no answer, there was nothing. Sasuke didn’t bother to respond, Sasuke didn’t shift, didn’t wake, didn’t do anything. And he knew that that was how it was supposed to be anyway. If Sasuke had been lucid, cognizant, he would have heard the moment he’d opened the door, taken his shoes off and walked stealthily through the house.
He had a job to do now. He had to tell Hokage-sama, he had to make arrangements, he had to get everything set up and taken care of. He had to prepare himself for something he’d known would happen, eventually.
Mechanically, he drained the tub, watching the cold- far too cold (how long had he been in there?)- water disappear down the drain, exposing his lover’s body to the cool air in the house. It was hot outside, Sasuke must have turned the air on when he’d come home. He’d never taken kindly to the summers, preferring the winters. Rising, he pulled out a towel, one of the fluffy ones that Sasuke’d enjoyed. He had once told him that he liked to wrap the fluffy towels around himself and curl up on the couch, a book and hot chocolate in his hands. It was a great way to relax. He’d teased Sasuke for being a girl.
A small smile graced his handsome, scarred face as he wrapped the towel around the cold, stiff body. How, how had the gods dared to take this man from him? He’d known it would happen sooner or later, they were shinobi, they were tools and tools were bound to break eventually. And that’s what had happened to Sasuke. He could feel it in his heart of hearts.
He carried Sasuke to their bedroom, marveling at the added weight death cast upon the slender form. Without Sasuke’s awareness, the body was simply weight. A hundred and seventy-six pounds of dead weight. He closed his eyes and laid his lover on the bed, aware that they would no longer share the long nights here together, aware that he’d missed the only opportunity he’d had to be with him a final time because he had been out hunting, following the Hokage’s orders.
With Sasuke unmoving below him, he dried the pale body; much paler now that death had claimed him, and held his tears back, knowing that Sasuke wouldn’t like it much. He never had liked to see him cry, little though he did.
This was one more thing to add to the list of sins he needed to atone for. Not being there when he was needed, denying his lover the very presence he’d needed when he’d been needed the most.
He dressed him, moving his lithe fingers quickly and deftly over the dead form, letting his fingers not touch the skin, unwilling to feel the cold body that was all that remained of his lover. There was something so hard about being left behind, time and time again. And he knew that he would have to answer for that one day, when he died, but he didn’t think he could handle the pain, not when he knew that when his time finally came, he would suffer in hellish fires.
With Sasuke finally dressed, clothed in his ever familiar black pants and shirt, his scratched hitae-ate tied faithfully to his forehead like he’d worn it constantly. To any casual glances, Sasuke looked to be resting, a mission to come or fresh from a mission. He looked like he was gathering his strength about him. But to those that knew him intimately, it would be immediately apparent that his time had come.
He placed a kiss to Sasuke’s cold lips.
Sasuke’s cold nose.
Sasuke’s cold forehead.
He would never forgive himself for not being here, not when he had been all the last Uchiha had had left. He would not forgive himself for being late. Not this time.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t save you,” he murmured, his deep voice tinged with sadness much more prominent than anything else, the lazy tone gone.
Familiar hand signs passed and he poof-ed away from his lover, his dead lover that he couldn’t save. Tears fell from his eyes as he appeared before the Hokage.
“Kakashi, what have I told you about using doors?” she growled, her voice deep and husky, more manlier than it should have been in a woman as fair as she, belying her age.
“I have bad news,” Kakashi murmured, not bothering to comment as he usually did. “The ANBU, Uchiha Sasuke, was found dead in his apartment. Your orders?”
It was just another day, and soon, Sasuke would be just another name he would pay tribute to at the stone.
He was shinobi.
He was a tool, and he would be used until he finally broke.
But he was the last half of Team Kakashi, and he had a feeling that he would break soon. And when he did break, Sakura would be all that remained.
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Chapter notes: Don't own Naruto. Written for BrucesGirl because she likes this pairing.