Long ago in a magical forest of magic and wonder… oh who are we kidding the forest was a forest, green with trees and hoppy little creatures. Yeah, you know that kind. In the center of the not so interesting forest there sat a small kingdom, no this isn’t magical either so fooey on you.
In this not so magical kingdom there lived a King and his daugh-… son. The King was getting on in years and he feared that after the death of his wife, if he did not remarry, his son would be all alone in life. So one day the King decided to marry the Queen of a neighboring kingdom. Later he would learn that when on a dating site and searching for a queen to specify one that isn’t of the drag variety.
Moving on then… The King and the Queen got married, it was a lovely spring wedding with flowers and cake… and why are we telling you this? The Queen’s name was Kukazu, he was a greedy and selfish man who cared only for himself, only marring the King for his fortune. Kukazu had no place for the King or his son in either of his black little hearts… he had five after all.
Now one day the young princess…prince…daughter…son…spawn of the king had been outside in the garden sacrificing… playing with a bunny. He heard a scream from within the castle and rushed inside to find his mother like person standing beside the body of the King.
The King appeared to have died from old age, no one knew about the poison in his dinner so shush. It was when the King was buried that the Queen took the throne and took over. The kingdom was changed entirely so that all traces of the King be erased and replaced with Queen Kukazu’s image… taxes also skyrocketed.
Now while the queen took power no one paid much attention to the heir. The heir was a boy of pale skin and startling white hair and pale eyes. And due to the hatred of the Queen, he was often forced to wear a blue and gold dress with a red bow and sleeves. His name was Snow Hidan. Haha bet you all thought we would say Snow White..but see that would be normal and one thing we aren’t is normal.
One day the selfish and egotistical queen made his way down to his private chambers. The room was dark and filled with viles and potions and money hidden under things, no light made it into the room at any time of the day. Kukazu made his way in his grand purple and black robes down to the only interesting object in the room, a grand and shiny mirror.
“Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who is the richest and prettiest of them all?” the Queen spoke as he faced the swirling surface of the mirror.
The mirror shimmered for a moment before the face of a young boy appeared with a sigh. He had striking red hear and dark rings around his aquamarine eyes. “You…” he began.
“Oh I knew it!” Kukazu exclaimed spinning on his heels and hugging his money… where was he hiding that?
“Let me finish,” the mirror boy growled. “Ahem. As I was saying. You are not either of those things. For Snow Hidan is the richest in looks and blood…” The mirror person turned his head to the side and muttered, “Lucky spawn of the King having arms to kill….”
“Gaara! You must be joking,” Kukazu snarled turning on the mirror. There had to be some mistake.
“Nope.”
“Any chance of a cruel joke?”
“Nada.”
Kukazu scowled and turned around, his fists balled. “I must dispose of the princess…spawn creature.”
Gaara piped up and spun to face the queen in his mirror, “Can I have his body to kill with when you’re done?”
“No.”
“Damn you.”
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Chapter notes: *falls dead laughing* Ok if you don't get a kick out of this something is screwy in your head. This was inspired by a very funny and amusing picture you will get to see later in time. For now enjoy the insanity Rach and I have been planning!