A lifetime adventure
At the secret village of Konoha* everything and everyone were at peace.
Even so, they rested not. Here and there, surveillance was tight and alert.** Nothing a pretty skilled ninja could not deal, though.***
The mission was difficult. Information right from Hokage’s office had to be snapped away. It was vital to the spy that nobody noticed, because ninjas must be very careful when retrieving the documents back to Tsunade’s safe.
If anything leaked, then everything would be lost.
Early, reading a fantasy book, our spy found out a very interesting way to deceive skilled guards. The author claimed that moving quietly attracts attention to invader, so the way to roam around was to be part of the noise. Something like that.[4]
The main problem is: it was the first time anybody tried to do something like that in… how much time? Years? Centuries?
I mean… to obtain restricted information, without mean any harm to Konoha clan itself.
Even so, the information our spy needed could only be obtained in Hokage’s office. Because nobody else knew what our hero needed to know.
So, with a heart beating as loudly as it would beat when you are in a completely awkward situation, our ninja moved forward through the door. Oh, you thought about the window…
But as you recall, you are dealing with ninjas: so, you should expect then to jump around, et cetera, and them being caught by surveillance teams…
No… our hero – as Terry Prachett advised – had chosen the front door. Because, nobody would be stupid enough to choose such direct path. OK, I agree with you dear reader… Naruto would! But then Naruto is special and unpredictable. That is his best and dear trait.
The office was clean and neat. The safe would be… in the usual spot? No… that would be careless. Read the back of the back of the back, ninja’s first lesson. It was a very important document, and restricted for public view, as the subject it covered was like a classified item as nuclear submarine or Tsunade’s true age.
Of course, matters that serious would be codified. Everyday many classified documents were encrypted through a series of jutsus known only for Konoha decoding ninjas. But in this case, the spy was positive: the document was not encrypted!
So if it had to be hidden from spies, it had to be at the safe. But the safe would be the first place anybody would storage important – and not encrypted – documents. So it could not be held in a safe.
But then… Oh, my head spins…
Fortunately, unlike your humbly author, our ninja did not linger about this specific problem while in action. It thought hard and seriously about this serious problem early. For almost four hours…[5]
They were leaves. So were do you hide a leaf? In a florest, right?
At the mess of Tsunade’s desk, to be more precise. Because, as I told you, the remaining of her office is neat as Shizune’s righteousness and discipline.
Trembling, our hero searched for the prize. Not because our spy was eager, thinking at fortune awaiting for. For God’s sake[6] no! Not because the thrill of a amateur emulating James Bond in Impossible Mission. And even less probable, because the ninja was scared like a kitten when a big bad dog nears it.
It was because our spy was happy. A kind of happiness one can achieve rarely in his life, and he knows it. When your son is born, when your mother is proud of you at the graduation… and when your love smile.
A small tear fell to the floor, and it was the only evidence of its presence there that night. Perhaps Hatake Kakashi or Pakkun would recognize the scent, if somebody asked him about our night intruder. But as it stands, nobody would ever notice.
If I were a Hokage, or a Tsunade[9] I would be very worried about security after this story. Any volunteer to tell her it?
Four months, one week and four days and half later, a dumbfounded Naruto stared at the pack in his hands:
– Hinata, how come you know today is my Birthday!? Nobody never asked me or even knew it!
Hinata - of course - smiled her shy smile and blushed. It was her little secret, shared only with Tonfa readers. Her most prized lifetime adventure: to give her beloved a birthday gift.
And so, my infinite footnotes end. Sorry about the inconvenience. [10]
* Though it is hard to believe a village could keep a secret its location, when Japanese version of Rushmore mounts stand tall and proud at everyone’s sight. And as our history is after Third (Secret) World War, I wonder if they ever thought about Google Earth…
** That I found a bit more difficult to believe, as somebody like Kisame and Itachi were able to roam freely through the village. I mean, nobody thought them a bit suspect, being covered from head to feet?
*** And after that, I doubt even more about Konoha’s security program. What the hell are the guards doing?! They were worse than that Captain Vimes and the Vigilance in “Guards! Guards!”
[4] As a matter of fact, the author described his character – an assassin – to slide through. As I have only a translated version of Terry Prachett – Pyramids, I can only guess the original word. And because of this book, I got his irritating mania to insert footnotes. Though, his footnotes are much more fun to read than his actual fiction… that is pretty much good. (and I fear, my footnotes are worse than my fiction… that is pretty much bad as well)
[5] Well, it was not bad, if you ask me. At least it did not last four days… For our hero, everything dealing with the subject in question took at least a whole day. Read the last footnote only after reading the whole story, in order to understand this comment.
[6] OK, you anglo-saxan speaker guys, how did you know God drinks sake at Friday’s? (the bar[7], not the week’s day, mind you).
[7] Not the regular Friday’s, but one that must be in Discworld.[8] I mean there must be a Friday’s there, because even in Brazil there is one, damn it!
[8] As I did not read all Discworld Books I am only rambling foolishness. But as the Pratchett story stands, I would not doubt about Friday’s filial in Discworld.
[9] I admit, I envy her breasts. I am flatter than Lina Inverse, and as angry about it as the hot-headed sorcerer, and unlike Inverse, I can not hope they will grow because I am not a teenager like Lina.
[10] You understand that I had to put infinite footnotes in order to keep you away form this one: you agree with me, don’t you? I mean, when the subject is Naruto, Hinata can not act properly! Now, footnote [5] makes sense?
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Chapter notes: Disclaimer: Naruto is a Kishimoto Masato's manga. Bandai airs out and Shounen Jump publishes it. This is a fan work, not supposed to make profit of theirs.