~*~
After leaving the missions office late at night, I meander my way down the deserted village streets, heading home. As I pass by the Hokage mountain, I can’t help but lift my head to seek out the figure I know will be there, nestled between the Sandaime and the Yondaime. I don’t want to see the shadow of you huddled up in the comfort of stone but I know you are. You are always there, especially on holidays, regardless of how stupid they are.
I’d like to say you are plain troublesome and not worth the effort of my worry but I know I’d be lying to myself. You are worth the worry, so without a word I change my destination from my warm apartment and soft bed to the cold, sharp angles of stone. It doesn’t take nearly as long to reach the top as I had imagined and I know it’s because for some reason, you make me feel the need to be almost hasty with my approach. Not that I think you’ll do anything as stupid as throwing yourself over the edge – because we both know you won’t die from such a thing and you’re far too honorable for that anyway – but more because I already know that there are tears and shadows in your sad cerulean eyes.
Eyes that seem to have no business looking so forlorn.
Over the years since Sasuke abandoned this village – abandoned you – I have gotten to know you more, possibly even better than your so-called best friend had. For a reason unknown to me, that fact sparks a feeling of pride in my chest. I know your heart is still breaking, even after he’s been gone seven years, and I think the village misses your sparkle as much as I do. I’m not exactly sure when you became so important to me but as I step up next to your inwardly collapsed form and you lift your head to look at me with those heartbreakingly sad eyes, I don’t much care.
I plop down on the ground carelessly next to you and you whimper softly, my name escaping your lips in a caught breath, “Shikamaru.”
Wordlessly I open my arms to you and soon you’re within my embrace, your tears sliding down my neck and your pain seeping into my skin but I don’t care because maybe if I take some of your pain like this in small doses, it will soon all be gone. Maybe you can smile again and have it mean something. So as you curl into me, your hands clutching desperately at my jounin vest and your soft golden hair tickling my neck, I tighten my arms around you and press a kiss to the crown of your head.
“Everything will be fine eventually Naruto. Soon you won’t hurt so badly but until then, I’ll always be here for you.”
I’ve told you the same thing every year since that damned bastard deserted you, broke your heart and tried to kill you and every year you respond with a sniffle and a muffled “I know.”
Every year except this year and I am shocked from my toes to the tip of my ponytail.
“Thanks Shika. You mean more to me than you know.”
Once my shock fades, I smile softly and nuzzle your hair, my arms tightening around you as you slip off into sleep. Every year you cry yourself to sleep in my arms and I carry you back to your rundown apartment.
Every year except this year, when I’ve decided that since you have changed up the routine, I will too. Instead I bring you to my apartment and after removing our weapons and shoes, I settle you down next to me in my soft bed. Your arms slide around my waist and your face presses into my chest and I smile as I join you in dreams where tomorrow the sun shines a bit brighter and you might chance a smile.
~*~
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