“You asked for me.” Shikamaru yawned, leaning against the door frame with his most bored expression.
Tsunade would have boxed the shadow-nin’s ears if she didn’t know that his attitude was just a front to hide the turmoil underneath it. Leaders had to keep a constant attitude even in times that it became unthinkable to, Nara Shikamaru had to look bored or suffer the consequences of panicking his followers. Leaders could not be allowed to look affected as the majority were, they had to stay strong and distanced from such emotions or everything fell apart. And they could not afford things to happen that way, not now.
“We cant ignore the fact that Konoha is in danger, Pain has not acted but he will eventually.” She said with a low urgency in her voice. “And when he does…”
Furusaku nodded, she didn’t have to finish her sentence.
“Naruto will succeed.” Shikamaru said hotly. “I believe it.”
Tsunade shook her head. “We cant let this hinge on Naruto, we must also do our part.” She told him sternly. “We will help him. Pain is waiting for us to panick and crack on the inside.”
“He wants us to go into civil war,” Shikamaru said. “That’s how he learnt, his suffering was through war. So that’s what he hopes this atmosphere of uncertainty will do to us. But hell if I’ll run around like a headless dog.”
“He could use the Kyuubi for war.”
“Yes, but accumulate all of them for minor attacks?” Shikamaru pushed on. “No, he’s only going to use them when he wants to destroy all the countries at once, a mass cleansing of lives. Not yet, he will kill us eventually but not yet. He’ll wait till we crack.”
“That doesn’t do us any good, Shikamaru.”
“I know.” He said. “But we do get to keep our wits about us.”
Tsunade studied both men for a while. Well, he did have a point, but they couldn’t rely on it one hundred percent. And that was that. She didn’t know what else to do except…
“I may have a plan.” Furusaku said quietly. “Its not the best but its our only shot.”
They had talked about this between the two of them endlessly. Tsunade couldn’t refuse, like he said…it was their only shot.
“You’ll need the first Hokage’s private records.” Shikamaru said casualy. “He might have something there.”
Surprise flitted across Furusaku’s eyes. “How did you know?” he asked, sounding impressed. “Since when did you suspect this?”
Shikamaru just shrugged. “It was the only logical explanation as to why she called you. I don’t think she’d allow to send you away easily, so her sending you away now must mean something real important, something she couldn’t send anyone else for. If she couldn’t send anyone else for it then it must mean the mission involves your specific skills. Skills of control which are deeply in need of when linked to the Kyuubi situation.”
Furusaku met her glance, but there was no doubt in his eyes.
“But you can’t take me with you. Im not being a coward” Shikamaru said. “I need to stay, I owe Asuma that. If we’re dying anytime soon then I’ll have to look after Kurenai. I gave my word.”
“We didn’t doubt that.” Tsunade said.
“Then why’d you call me?” Shikamaru said and immediately looked surprised that he had spoken. Which was strange, Nara Shikamaru hardly said anything without having thought about it.
“I could hardly send you away,” Tsunade smiled, taking a small pleasure at his astonishment. It was a small pleasure indeed, a butterfly upon a dung heap, a revolting destructive dung-heap with situation being as it were. “People would wonder and that would run the panic quicker than poison runs through the blood. Youre one of the most capable chounins we have and we need every kind of that we can get.”
“So I suspect my jobs simply to keep the anarchy of civil war at bay,” he sighed looking a bit disappointed in what he probably assumed was a minor job. “Do I need any defense strategies for Konoha? At least just for appearance’s sake, help make people feel safer and look like we’re actually doing something that could seem to potentially help us.”
“Obviously you have something in mind or you would not have brought the suggestion up.” Tsunade said as patiently as she could.
“So I’m right.” He managed to somehow look smug, yet subdued at the same time.“Well, I geuss I’ll ask some minor chuunin to start patrolling about at night, small shifts between eachother, just making rounds. On the look out for whatever seems shifty. Radio communication between each patrol unit will be put in place ofcourse, so we look official.” Shikamaru said at the top of his head. “That’s it.”
“Well,” said Furusaku thoughtfully. “If Shikamaru isn’t coming I may have to look for someone else.”
“Sai?” suggested Shikamaru as if it wasn’t the most obvious thing in the world.
“He was my first choice.” Furusaku explained. “But Danzou’s rigged him up for something we as usual have no idea about.”
Tsunade had to keep herself from scowling, even if Danzou recent intention had been to help Konoha it did not mean he had a constant agenda. That man was as slippery as a snake and she could never forget that his initial aim had been to make her job as Hokage as difficult as possible. She would never like that man.
Shikamaru muttered something under his breath, it sounded like a weary resignation to the word ‘troublesome’ but it sounded almost mournful, too. “Sakura…well, she’s hardly in the state for a mission. I don’t think she could deal with such a serious mission at her best potential when she’s got all that emotional baggage.” He wasn’t being mean; he was just putting it out on the table as it was. What with both her teammates gone – one abandoning the village to become a traitor and the other chasing away after a demon-man – and her sensei dead, Tsunade did not blame her. But if the girl didn’t pick up soon…she was afraid of the scars such pain and suffering would leave. No one should ever suffer that way, no one not ever.
“Furusaku,” Tsunade snapped out of her reverie. “You may have access to the first Hokage’s manuscripts – whatevers left of them anyway – and when you find someone as soon as you can, do not delay in your journey, just leave me a message and go before anyone notices you wanted to.” She told them firmly. “No one must know of our true situation.”
Two men nodded and left. They both had their missions and they would carry them out as long as they still had but one drop of blood within them.




Lee didn’t know what to say, he knew he should say something but he just couldn’t find the words. Sakura was just a ghost, she smiled she laughed, but there was something in her eyes that spoke of deep war wounds, of a dying light. But he couldn’t do anything, try as he might he couldn’t forget that she was waiting for someone else.
“You know you could just talk to her.” A voice came from behind him.
Lee whipped around. “Neiji! Er…what are you – ”
“Don’t change the subject,Lee.” Neiji sighed “Go talk to her.”
Lee shook his head. “I don’t know what to say. She’s in real pain Neiji and I can’t make it go away by just talking to her.”
“How do you know if you don’t even try.” Neiji said reasonably.
They stood a long time looking at eachother. Neiji never gave advice and Lee knew it must have taken a lot out of him to overcome his whole bastard front he put up and come out and say something. He was kind of surprised and…touched. Neiji looked slightly irritated at this.
“Thankyou.” Said Lee.
Neiji shrugged. “Don’t let it get to your head. I’m only helping you out because I know Sakura was the only one who kept with you while we were away.”
Lee smiled before walking away. “Thanks anyway.”


“Shikamaru!”
The shadow-chounin lifted a sleepy glance to Ino, she couldn’t want to do the chuunin rounds, could she? Shikamaru knew there could be potential danger and Ino should be able to take care of herself independent of him, but a small part of him recalled that she was his teammate and he didn’t think he wanted to loose one. He couldn’t imagine loosing another part of his team to join Asuma.
The blonde ran up wheezing for breath.
He felt a bit guilty. If Ino knew his thoughts she’d probably be pissed…a lot pissed that he didn’t trust her to be totally safe. It would be the same he would’ve done for Chouji if Chouji wanted to go independent of anyone else of the team yet somehow different….
“I have..something..important…to..tell you.” She clutched her side.
“What?” said Shikamaru pulling a shurinken from the bark of the tree he was practicing on. He inspected it idly, as always his aim was perfect. Whatever Ino had to tell him was probably something fickle and irrelevant, she was his teammate and he cared, but she was also a girl. And that was just troublesome.
“Its Kurenai!” Ino stomped her foot. “Why’d you think I ran up here for?!”
Shikamaru whipped around. “Whats wrong with Kurenai?!”
“She’s having a baby that’s what!”
Without another word Shikamaru set into a streak for the hospital.

Blood dripped from Sakura’s hands, coated up to her elbows. You could use Chakra to fix things medically, but you couldn’t heal a pregnant woman until the baby was out. And thus the baby was removed the old fashioned way. She liked to be busy, when she was busy she didn’t have to think so much, she just had to act and do what the job at hand required of her.
The dream ended when she placed the babe in the woman’s arms.
So…small.
How long would this last, how long would the baby live in such uncertain times. When the world was on the brink of chaos, how short would this life be lived? How painful? It was a dangerous wild new world and no one could protect the present nevertheless look towards the future.
So…small.
Kurenai seemed dazed but she looked so beautiful, even when she was as exhausted as any woman in labour. She shone with a radiance Sakura supposed only belonged to woman holding a piece of themselves cradled in their arms. She didn’t even bother to wash her hands properly, Grabbing the towel off it’s perch on the operation table she let one of the nurses close the wounds up while she went out to give the news.
Tube lights blinded her vision and she had to blink for a bit to see everything properly. Everyone was gathered round her but it was the first person who questioned was the assault of Shikamaru;
“How is she?” he barked.
She smiled and she must have looked tired. “Fine, she wants to see you now.”
Shikamaru sigh sounded as bone weary as she must have looked because Ino frowned with concern as Chouji did too.
“It’s a boy.” Sakura included the group. “A beautiful boy –”
“Thankyou.” Shikamaru breathed intensely. “Sakura, thankyou.”
She blinked back tears, as she followed them in. All three groups were here. All except her’s. Tears were alright in these circumstances, today was a day of celebration and she hoped they looked like tears of joy rather than pain. She did not think she wanted anyone to repeat those same words to her, she heard them every night, they were said by someone else, somewhere else. But it was painful all the same.





Sakura looked up to find Lee waiting for her at the exit. Waiting…for her? Probably someone else. But-
“Sakura-chan.” He said warmly.
She smiled hoping the hesitation didn’t show on her face. “Hey.” What did Lee want? no one rarely approached her and she really didn’t want his pity nor anyone else’s. Working on Kurenai had taken a toll on her…seeing all the three remaining teams undivided cooing round the newborn baby served as a constant reminder that she was without a team herself. The sense of loneliness in such celebration had become so unbearable she had had to leave the room on some murmured excuse.
So when Lee accompanied her on her walk she hadn’t refused, why? Her heart screamed to be alone but another small part missed being in company with someone else. She missed company a lot more than she let on.
Lee didn’t say anything, he walked with her.
“You should have seen Shikamaru, Sakura.” Lee said. “He was pacing around so much just looking at him made me tired.”
“He was pretty worried, wasn’t he?” She smiled.
“Of course, that’s his sensei’s kid.” Lee nodded. “It meant a lot to him, Sakura. You heard what he said.”
Sakura shrugged. “I was just doing my job, Lee.”
“Yeah, but Shikamaru was real relieved. I’ve never seen him so worried before.”
Sakura frowned, Lee had grown up. He didn’t look so silly anymore now that he wore his chuunin vest, she was oddly surprised at the line her thoughts started taking. He was taller and more confident. The old shyness was still there, but a more modest confidence blazed underneath it, a detemination to succeed that wasn’t quite so cheesy anymore. It struck her how much he and Naruto were alike, Naruto determined to fight those above him and Lee determined to defy what fate had brought him. Just him wearing his chuunin jacket showed how much he succeeded, how much he could succeed. And his eyes…there was no pity in them, just…just hope. And…something oddly like love.
Like he would protect her no matter what and not just her, anyone.
He wanted to help, but he didn’t want to shame her through pity.
And she was so glad at that. God, Sakura was so glad.
“You looked lost for a second.” Lee smiled.
Sakura shook her head. “No,” she smiled. “I’m not lost. I think I know where I am now.” She’d miss her team-mates
She’d miss them all the time and she’d hurt forever until she was united with them. But…Lee was here. And she started thinking that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to talk to someone once in a while. Just once in a while so she didn’t have to be so alone.
“Youre in Konoha and youre an awesome shinobi.” Lee played along though he couldn’t possibly know what she meant.
“Please, Lee.” She told him. “I suck at it…I’m more of a medical ninja.”
“Don’t be so self-depreciating.”
“Well its true, I suck at attack... Defense and healing is all I’m good for.”
“I heard a lot about you’re chakra control.” Lee said seriously. “You could make a real cool assault ninja, Sakura.”
“Medical is all I know.” She sighed. “Anyway, I’ve already found my place and since Kakashi sensei is sort of…” She felt weak, she couldn’t even finish the sentence. Since Kakshi was dead there was no one to teach her, well no one she felt worth being taught by, not right now. It seemed that all she had cherished had been shattered. With Kakashi dying so had the last bond that had existed to tie her, Naruto and Sasuke together.
Lee looked pensive for a moment and then finaly he spoke. “This isnt what Kakashi would’ve wanted.”
“It’s not what I wanted.” Sakura whispered.
“He wouldn’t want you dead like this…I don’t want you dead like this.”
“Well, I can’t do much about it, Lee. This is all that’s left for me.”
“You can’t say that.”
“Its what I feel.”
“You don’t have a dream?” Lee said before he cold stop himself. “Any aspirations?”
Sakura lifted her green eyes and stared at him for a long time. “If you’re trying to mean a goal I can work towards, then…no.” she said. “My dream is, well – not something I can work towards. I can’t make it come true, because I already tried. I’ve realized that I have to wait for that dream, it has to come towards me, and my dream has a mind of its own. It won’t listen to me when I call. So I’ll just have to wait and be patient”
Even if it killed her…She’d wait for him.
Lee studied the ground, for a while she couldn’t see his face.
“How long will you wait?”
“As long as it takes.”
There was no mistaking, no dodging about who they were talking about. They both very well knew. She loved Sasuke, it was as simple as that. She had thought she could salvage his innocence. The first attempt had almost killed her if Furusaku had not jumped in front of her. After he killed Orichimaru, she thought he’d come back . But he didn’t, he created Hebi and killed his bastard of a brother without their help. Then strangely enough…he went on to join Akatsuki, the very group his brother had belonged to. Why?
And she still loved him. Even when he had never loved her, when he had never cared. And that was the truth, he had never cared, except…
Sakura, thankyou.
For what? Thankyou, for what? What had she done to ever make him say that. Why?
Sakura, thankyou.
That was the last thing he had told her. That was the only hope she had left and the only reason why she held on and waited. No matter what.
Then Lee said something that flooded her with gratitude so immense it must have burned in her eyes. “Then I will wait with you.”
A ninja always kept his word. That was Lee’s code. She almost cried right then because she couldn’t love this boy the way he needed, but he still held out his hand to her and held it out so it would always be available should she ever want it.
“But you have to train.” Lee pointed one finger in the air on this condition. “I’ll help with your training and prove you wrong, you could be an awesome ninja, Sakura. I really believe that. And I’ll keep on believing until you believe it.”
“Thank you.” She choked. “Thankyou, Lee.”
She knew he had turned his face so he didn’t have to let her know he saw her tears. She appreciated the act but it just made the tears flow faster. Naruto wasn’t here, but now she had Lee. It was Ok.
she was already at her door and Lee was leaving, she could weep in peace. It didn’t hurt to cry once in a while. And it had been a long time since she had something nice and hopeful to cry about.
And for the first time in a long time, she was hopeful. And with that came a relief, like someone who had been drowning for such a long time that when their head broke the surface they didn’t know it till it happened.