Reviews For Naruto: An Alternate destiny
Name: factknowhow (Signed) · Date: 13/02/11 - 11:52 am · For: The Yondaime Lives
why do the best of fanfictions only have 1 or 2 chapters? :(
Name: Patsuki21 (Signed) · Date: 12/01/08 - 06:21 pm · For: Chapter 1 Naruto the New Shinobi
great story this totally answers my challenge
Author's Response: haha well to tell you the truth i didnt see your challenge
Name: Justeene (Anonymous) · Date: 07/01/08 - 12:00 pm · For: Chapter 1 Naruto the New Shinobi
this is really good. i love how you changed the plot to fit your story. its perfect. if there's any more, please update it. and write until your finders fall off.lol just kidding ^_^
Author's Response: Thanks ive had the biggest writer's block for a long time
Name: Diln (Anonymous) · Date: 11/10/07 - 03:35 pm · For: Chapter 1 Naruto the New Shinobi
wow, i love it
Name: white cat (Anonymous) · Date: 11/10/07 - 03:04 pm · For: Chapter 1 Naruto the New Shinobi
This is great! But the pace of the story is a little fast... Perhaps cutting individual incidents into chapters and describing them in more detail could make it less overwhelming to read. Other than that, a good story so far. Looking forward to the rest!
Name: MindlessWanderer (Signed) · Date: 02/10/07 - 02:38 pm · For: Chapter 1 Naruto the New Shinobi
Ok, so you said you wanted some constructive criticism. Well first things first, the basic story like you've got going on here is pretty good, except you seem to be rushing the characters developement really fast.
Also you are making Naruto into a Gary-Stu, he's too powerful and likable and doesn't seem to have any weaknesses.
don't get me wrong the story is pretty good I just think you should slow it down a little.
Name: Immortal Mdawg (Anonymous) · Date: 02/10/07 - 04:33 am · For: The Yondaime Lives
Good so far, but isn't it enma not emma
Author's Response: yeah that is one of my typos because i forgot to double check information
Name: Silent Witness (Signed) · Date: 30/09/07 - 10:38 pm · For: The Yondaime Lives
One tiny little thing: use html to break up paragraphs. The basic code for a paragraph is this: use "
Name: Swords_and_Bandages (Signed) · Date: 29/09/07 - 09:54 am · For: The Yondaime Lives
Your story concept and the general plot are good. In my opinion, though, even though this is just the intro, I think you're letting the story progress too fast. My suggestion is to include a little more detail, and be descriptive, so that the reader can perfectly visualize what is going on.
Otherwise, you're in a good place. Just keep on doing your thing.
Author's Response: Thank you for that advice I value it.