Reviews For The Forsaken Heirs
Name: mst88 (Signed) · Date: 04/06/15 - 02:19 pm · For: The Seven Deadly Sins - (Part I) Lust
I cannot tell you how much I love all of the roll in the mud, drag threw the dirt, take a crap in somebody else's yard political intrigue. Not usually my thing but hell yeah this freakin Naruto! Speaking of which the CPR thing had me dying of laughter. Use that tongue Naruto, after all you are a go big or go home kind of guy lol! Friend you have got me going through Hyuga's like Choji with a bag of chips(loved the talking chips BTW)and kicking them to the curb. First Ko, them Tokuma and now Iroha, hope Sasuke takes him up on the offer to return. Of course I have to mention Kiba the ass kicker for money, all sweaty, bloody in his tightie-whities, rubbing his two brain cells together. So hot! And then there is our power couple, who have finally coupled after almost a year of being married. Sasuke may still get that clan revived yet. I am so freaking greedy when it comes to what you write, these are so deliciously long but yet when I am done reading I am still wanting more lol. Like an addiction. I seriously can't wait for the next chapter. Oh yeah before I forget, are you going to continue The Glam Show? Just wondering.
Name: mst88 (Signed) · Date: 23/02/15 - 11:28 am · For: A Tyranny of Souls - Part II
How do you do it friend!? You have painted Tokuma into such a hot naughty badass for me to feast on! Forget Ko! Although I do um like them hehe together. Is it bad that I hope Tokuma makes the elder bleed a slow horrible death since I think he is a dirty old man and has used Tokuma as his personal blowup doll, could just be the flu clouding my thoughts. Yes I am horrible sick again. I love all the intrigue and backstabbing going on in the Hyuga ant hill. OMG the story of the Shinigami, that was just ahhhh wonderful *sighs dreamily* Oh man and the underground group(I forgot what you called them, sorry)You know Shino of the 4SW will always be the Shino I remember and think of, not the XMan *shakes head to much and is now dizzy*My heartaches for his current state in your fic. Then there is Kiba. Kiba, Kiba Kiba and I have to ask he is a male prostitute because that is the vibe I'm getting, if he is I am exchanging my $$ into Ryo and want his number By proud of that chin hair Kiba because it skyrockets your hotness in my book. I wonder how Sasuke is going to react to Hinata's worked over look if he returns before it's healed that is. Until next time my friend I'll be under my snuggie with Roy, a cup of hot apple cider and tissues.
Author's Response: I AM NOT THE ONE WRITING THIS FIC!!! I am the one typing it, but it writes itself. Nothing in here is my idea. The characters just appear out of nowhere to harass me and are like ... do it this way or else we will not give you any peace. I can't even sleep. I study and write, that is what my life has become, mostly because of this goddamn fic. I only think of it, I dream of it, the characters are with me wherever I go. This fic is not MY FAULT. Had I written it, it would have been different and not so cruel. I am deeply horrified by concepts like child rape and soldiering, torture and the likes. I generally keep away from those themes because I am a war-child myself and lived in refugee camps for a little less than half of my life. Things like international politics, wars, tortures, genocides ... there are certainly not things I want to delve into. Because they already have destroyed my life before I even started living it. And yet, here you have the Hyuga pulling the worms out of the ground and right back to the surface. Writing this fic is torture. Because you could just transpose it right back to real life. And that's scary, very scary. I also have the impression Tokuma has been abused by the Elder. Relationships with very young boys were pretty common in feudal Japan, but it doesn't make it right. It reminds me of those horrible stories I read of Americans adopting poor Romanian children after the downfall of the Socialism in Romania and transforming them into sex slaves. Again, things that make me feel very ill at ease and that I usually like to ignore. I guess this fic is God taking my face and shoving it into this big fat turd that we have made of the world. And I greatly suffer for Tokuma, on fanfiction.net, he is not a favorite character, a lot of people dislike him. But of all the characters, my hear truly breaks for him. Stuck killing his own father, not having the right to approach his cousin, surrounded by nothing but death. A tool whose only contact with reality was based on Ko, Suzuki and Hiruka. That is horrible. Shino is without any doubt the character I respect the most. I want to show him off a little more in the upcoming chapters, because I feel that in all this craziness he is the only voice of reason. And it makes me worry for Kiba. As you realized, he does do some shady things. Prostitution is one of them. My dear, I want you to take care of yourself and for Roy to finally do his job and cure you. I hope you get better soon!
Name: mst88 (Signed) · Date: 11/01/15 - 05:34 pm · For: A Tyranny of Souls - Part I
You know I would totally take up yoga if I had a Sasuka(Shika, Kaka, Kotet, Izzy, Gen, Deid or hell Jira)to get all horny on my ass(wouldn't even do it for my guy right now, jerk). Anyway, this was an action packed chap and awesome!!! I don't even know where to start drooling!! I will continue to love any and all interaction with Naruto lol. I am still envying Hana btw where Kakashi is concerned. I love all the politics and business stuff, to say my heart wasn't in my throat when Sas drug Hin to the Hyuga compound. Oh how could Ko do that, my heart(I have to add that Tokuma reminds me a lot of Neji)So can't wait to read more. Back under my blanket my friend, I seriously need to feel better.
Author's Response: Finally. Sitting down and responding to your reviews. And then, I will be catching up with your fic ... which I have been wanting to do for the longest while ... and then I will most probably beg for yet another fic of yours. But I will wait till you finish the Kiba one. It will be tough. Really tough, maybe will I even ask for two fics of yours, one of which might be yaoi (AND I NEVER READ YAOI, WOMAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME, we will discuss that in another review). Okay, okay, focus, Voyna. The yoga pants, eh? Well, I don't know how low Sasuke will fall, very honestly. Chapter 8 is THE chapter (if you see what I mean) and I am just waiting to see whether he will beg. After everything he made Hinata undergo, I would very much want him to simply beg. There is just so much sexual tension a man can take. But then, can you imagine the Avenger begging? I am writing that chapter at the moment and he just almost burned an ANBU with a cigarette while trying to smother another one with his foot ... yep. I guess sexual tension REALLY got to him. Naruto is a dickhead. I love him. And I hated him before this fic, very honestly. But he just started growing on me. He is stupidly brilliant. He is dumbly perceptive. He is an atomic rainbow. Why do I imagine Naruto like the Mantis Shrimp? Google Mantis Shrimp Oatmeal on the net and enjoy. Oh and if you want to know how I approach the SasuHinaKo relationship google The Velvet Mite Oatmeal. YOU HAVE TO DO IT!!! It is hilarious. Oh and if you want to know how I feel about the girl-power in this fic and Inuzuka Hana, just google How the Angler Male Gets Screwed Oatmeal. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO!!! I need you to. So you have a thing for Deidara?! Isn't he a tidbit feminine?! I mean you really are into males, Kakashi, Shikamaru, Jiraiya, Izumo, Kotetsu ... Deidara doesn't fit. But hey, I am into Kisame and Madara. I am so into Madara. I just want to write a MadaHina oneshot, but it would turn out like Lolita by Nabokov, and I hated that book. I am ranting so much, I missed you goddamit! You know you are perceptive. Neji and Tokuma do look a lot alike. And remember chapter 2 or 3, it was hinted Hanabi might have had feelings for her cousin ... this fic is becoming so deeply sleazy it puts me ill at ease. As for Ko, he is a broken man. With a strange sexuality. Since the first chapter I was wondering whether he wasn't actually gay. It doesn't leave my mind. Is Hyuga Ko gay?! He did have an erection in chapter 3, with Hinata. But it isn't unheard of that gay men have erections in heterosexual situations. Some marry, have children, etc. Is Ko gay? It obsesses me. It worries me that you are so sick. Are you sure you are okay? I mean that cold of yours has been going on for a very long time, my dear. Have you been to the doc? Get better or at least have some unlawful fun with Roy. Because if your man is being a dick, he doesn't deserve anything but you abusing Roy Mustang.
Name: mst88 (Signed) · Date: 28/11/14 - 07:57 pm · For: A Girl's Blood
I FREAKIN LOVE THIS STORY!!!! There is just way to much for me to comment and drool over.
All the thought you have put into for the inner works of Konoha, the politics, economy and all that has my mind blown(something I would so do if I could rub two brain cells together on a good day)I always enjoy reading any Sasuke/Naruto add a dash of Kakashi interaction.
OMG the whole Kiba/Anko thing, my gawd I want him as a stripper(what is he up to btw, do tell?!)
Then Sasuke/Yuina oh the fluffiness and the Hinata surprise hahaha.
And then the end AHHHH, I almost fell off the couch because the chap ended.
Oh man I finally broke down and read the final of Naruto I think WTF became my mantra for most of it. My gawd Shikamaru is so damn hot(I kind of have, yes have a thing for his dad still)Temari is on lucky biotch. Kiba is still good looking, I'd tap him, Shino went all Xmen??WAAA Don't get me started on Ino/Sai's kid which I'm still no sure of it's gender or that girl being Sakura's. Karin/Sasuke had a child and Sakura is passing her off as hers. I'm scared to see what happen to Kotetsu, Izumo and Genma. Where the hell is Orochimaru and Kabuto?!? So many unanswered questions.
Anywho, excellent my friend(I got so excited when I saw this)!!! I shell wait patiently for the next chap!
Author's Response: Ok. I need to bitch about the ending of Naruto now that you read it. Like, I need to bitch about it WITH YOU!!! I had to contain myself for a whole month now not to spoil anything. So, about Salada (how dumb a name is that, please?!) the whole fandom is like ... so this is Karin and Sasuke's kid. And now here comes my theory. Karin got sick of running after Sasuke and being his lapdog, she decided she could do her one-woman show and dumped the kid to him. The guy obviously has better shit to do than to take care of that kid (I mean, what a loving father, he is never there going around doing his shit and being all in all away) so he comes back to Konoha, finds his psychotic sycophant and dumps the kid at Sakura's because she is the only girl that is stupid enough (besides Hinata it seems) to destroy her future for a guy that has abused her during more than 600 chapters. He comes by, has a nice pussy to sink in every six months and so, doesn't have to take of his kid because Sakura does the job out of wuv for him. And here goes all that bitch'n'moaning about her becoming strong, and a mednin, bla bla bla. Fuck. You ever saw a doctor that had time to clean?! I never saw a doctor that had time to freakin' eat, let alone cook and clean! Hinata ... oh don't get me started on Hyuga Hinata. Obviously not the leader of her clan, obviously not a strong and independent kunoichi that does her shit. Nah, she just accepted being the second choice of a guy that ignored her for 700 fucking chapters, are you fucking kidding?! Becoming his baby incubator and cleaning lady ... and still having a shitty dressing style. FFS. TenTen bitching about there being no work while Lee is off having fun with their kid. Kurenai at age 40-something (I think 45 or so) looks as old as my mom ... who is 65. Megumi still bitching about men. LIKE IS IT ME OR THE WHOLE EPILOGUE REVOLVED ABOUT DICKS?! Like excuse-me ... NO. We are not human incubators, we are not cleaning ladies and the likes, we can be badass ... Oh, and the most badass of all badass girls, Anko ... fat. You know, I love curves on a woman. And I believe the important thing is to feel good in your body. But the way she is drawn is a caricature. So she decided she could live her life without a guy so she has to be unattractive based on Japanese standards?! I am pissed. About Kiba. He is gorgeous, but he looks kind of sad and alone as a girl pointed out. Everyone has a contact with someone else and here he is alone, with a girl that doesn't even open her pretty little mouth, and Akamaru is old. I am pissed. And obviously we will never hear anything about Kotetsu, Izumo and Genma (I was a HUGE fan of Kotetsu and Izumo, I loved those guys), we have no idea what happened to Kabuto/Orochimaru. Or Suigetsu. Or Jugo. Or fucking Karin. Or even fucking Yamato. Like, way to half-ass a 15-year old series. Wow, Kishi. You've done some really dumb shit, but this finale shines of stupidity. The only two things I am pretty sure about are that Gaara is gay. Celibate, but gay. And that Sai-Ino's kid is a boy, his name is Inojin they say. Anyways, like honestly the only good of the whole ending is ChoCho, she is feisty like shit, I love her. And I don't mind Sai-Ino, they make a nice couple of sexual predators. All this being said, thank you so much for your review. About Kiba ... he is my favorite bad boy, hence you can be sure that you will get your share of him next chapter. We will give another glimpse into the revolution and why Team 8, even broken and suffering is the baddest of all the teams. I took a vacation with this chapter, but the next will be just as bad as what I previously wrote. I'll give you a hint, Hyuga Tokuma will become a Hyuga general and sit at the general council, whith Hinata and Hiashi playing Go. While Sasuke rages and Hanabi blushes :P Now you think about it. By the way, while we are at it, a beta-reader is someone proofreading your work and giving you suggestions before you publish. I obviously don't have a beta-reader but I am offering my services because I hate waiting for updates :P
Name: mst88 (Signed) · Date: 10/11/14 - 03:49 pm · For: Queen of Hearts and King of Spades
Ahhhh!!! OMG this was so ahhhhh!!! I don't even know where to start on this chapters greatness. I absolutely love how everybody interacts, my god Sasuke and Naruto getting drunk lol. Oh Shibi Aburame making an appearance very nice, so how is Shino wink wink. Oh shit on how him and Kiba look now hot damn!! Now that I know what Shikamaru looks like(like his dad be still freak in heart)I want Temari dead so I can have his ass. Sorry I got completely off track lol. Can't wait to read more of this epically awesome story.
I'll be putting the final touch on Kiba's storry(on the first chapter), so look for it very soon my friend!
Author's Response: *sigh* I love you, ok? I got one of the worst flames in my life on ff.net for this chapter. Like the person accused me of having made Sasuke have sex with Hana ... what? Like ... what?! Anyways, I came here to get my dose of love from you. And yes, I wanted to make some nice Naruto and Sakura apparitions, even if I feel so much like bashing them at the moment. You read the ending of Naruto?! I feel like bashing each and every character. Shino and Kiba, my babies, included. I want to just get Kishimoto a copy of "The Feminine Mystique". He would need to get educated in certain respects. I think you haven't read the ending because our sexy Shino ... is not all that sexy in age :( Oh my beloved Shino, what happened to you. All in all ... this is all I will be saying about the ending. I love how greedy you are. Mind you, I would get into Kiba's boxers (do Inuzuka wear boxers, maybe they free-ball) anytime myself. I would take Shino. I will you Shikamaru though, I am not planning on having to claw my way into his ... heart (hah) with you and Temari on my back. I am so looking forward to that fic so much!!! I am so excited. I have been thinking about it a lot and harassing your profile actually. Good thing this isn't ff.net where you can see when someone checks out your profile and where he/she comes from. I think I checked it twice yesterday ¬¬ I have become a stalker.
Name: mst88 (Signed) · Date: 18/10/14 - 08:35 am · For: The Veiled Schemers
Before I do anything, let me take a minute to wish I was Hana . . . Okay so I have a ton of questions running through my head about what is up between Kakashi, Hana and Kiba but I will be patient and wait to find out.
Sasuke better watch his shit around the Hyuga grandpa. The man will own his balls as it is. And then poor Ko, oh I so want him to but then didn't, oh the emotions. Damn do I love this story!!!
On a different note I have the first chap done, just have some cleaning up to do ;)
Author's Response: Woman. Woman. Let me breathe her. Please, please, please tell me you are following the updates for the Naruto: The Last movie. Like ... did you see the new designs for Shino and Kiba. Of course, Kiba is kibalicious, who would ever doubt. But Shino ... I WANT TO BE SHIZU, NOW!!! OMG, he is so absolutely wonderful. Dreamy. Sexy. Perfect. Everyone is fawning over Ino though. I just feel she looks like a mix between Tsunade and Kaguya ... and her butt seems to have gotten bigger :D Like, understand me well, if you are writing a KibaSomeone, you need to look at him, he is pure perfection. Pure testosterone-filled perfection. Ok, back to the review. Let me tell you this way. I godforsakingly love you. You are picking up all the right parts, my dear. Kakashi, Hana and Kiba are very, VERY important for how this fic goes. I am sick of writing romance and am at a point where I want to shake some shit up. And when you want to shake some shit up, you need the Inuzuka, right? The next chapter will be called "The Queen of Hearts and the King of Spades" and will introduce that little plot twist I had in chapter 4 of the original. And as you say, that Elder makes my skin creep. He has his own agenda and it might get between our beloved power couple. We will see. And Ko ... what do you want me to tell you? Life is never so easy and sometimes honor is stronger than anything. But honestly, when I was done with that chapter I wondered he was gay. Very honestly. It had be thinking for a good thirty minutes. He actually could be ... NOW DON'T FORGET TO DROP ME A WORD WHEN MY KIBA FIC IS OUT. I am still thinking about it!
Name: mst88 (Signed) · Date: 03/10/14 - 07:22 am · For: The Beauty of Broken Things
As always another phenomenal chapter you have written my friend. I love how you have portrayed each character and of course your style I drool over with envy.
Oh you make me want to fly into your story and comfort Ko with every fiber of my being. Damn you(not really cause I heart you)for making me fall for his tormented soul!
Author's Response: *hug* Thank you so much. I just got a horrible flame for my chapter on FF.net. And I was like ... Do I really have to explain to you the fact that Hinata said "I WOULD have loved you", which means she didn't love him, and that Hanabi considers herself a nihilist and she doesn't know that she was in love with him. *sigh* I would explain it to the person if she had made herself an account so I could write a whole essay about Dostoyevsky's Karamazov and the expression of nihilism. But no, so I am ranting to you, who always write me wonderful reviews and whom I love ... and I still want my Kiba fic, I am so gonna harass you about it until I get it. But you know, I drool over your writing style as well, it is so simple, so straight to the point and just agreeable to read! Mine feels like an elephant in the china shop. AND WHO WOULDN'T FALL FOR KO'S TORMENTED SOUL. Yes I admit, another inspiration of Dostoyevsky, now the Demons. I need to stop reading Russian lit, honestly. Many kisses to the best reviewer AND WRITER of this site!!!
Name: mst88 (Signed) · Date: 14/09/14 - 04:29 pm · For: The Lady by the Pond
OMG I so can't wait for more of this!! The way you wrote the Hyuga all stern and unfeeling(except Ko who I still adore in this)switching to the cheeky unabashed Sasuke was just wonderful, I truly looked it! Excellent job my friend!!
Author's Response: Well, I am writing chapter II. And yeah, I have had a few strange ideas that I want to incorporate into this. I worry about this fic very much. This other fic I wrote got a much better response on Fanfiction.net (here it got none at all, whatever, don't care) and I wonder whether I should not switch my writing style completely to AU fics, they are easier to write. But no, we will go on with this. I hope you will like what is coming!