Reviews For To Be a Ninja!
Name: ontuva (Signed) · Date: 23/12/10 - 01:19 pm · For: Chapter 1
Alright, after only one chapter there's not much I can say about this story (I like to base my opinions on many chapters, because only then I can see if I really like the story or not). I'm curious to see where you are taking this (for example - is this going to be one of those Mary Sue -filled horrors or actually a decent and enjoyable fic).
I noticed one mistake in the beginning: "but he her his hands on her shoulders " but since I think I understood what you were trying to say it didn't bother me that much. ^^"
I do have one complaint though - this chapter was really quick. I mean, you just jumped right into the action, with no back story. Are the girls from our world or are they from Naruto-verse? And if they are from our world, how did they got to Naruto-verse? I would like the story to explain this. :)
Author's Response: I honestly don't know where I'm taking this either, as it's a rewrite to a fic I wrote, like, two years ago, but I'm trying not to make it full of Mary Sue stuff. (Note the trying)rnI was going to explain about the girls in the first chapter, after they had lunch, but I thought I'd put that in the second chapter, because I get bored quickly with super long chapters.rnThanks for the review! I'll try to make it better in the oncoming chapters based on what you said (and go through and fix those spelling mistakes... x'D).